CELEBRITY
10/08/2013 09:23 am ET

The Most Embarrassing Ways To Drink 'Wines By Wives' (PHOTOS)

Wines By Wives

Serious oenophiles, you may want to avert your eyes. Everyone else, come along with us on a wine-drinking journey to the center of the earth. By "center of the earth" we mean a place so embarrassing, you'll hope no one on earth can actually see you.

Wines By Wives is the celebrity wine club founded by "The Real Housewives of Orange County's" Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Barney. Club members select which celebrity housewife they'd like to receive wine recommendations from (for some reason) and then once a month, they'll send you two bottles each of their chosen whites and reds. Wines By Wives is careful to note that they are the only celebrity wine club that donates a portion of their proceeds to charity, although to whom and how much still seem to be a little foggy. The club's website indicates that "Tamra has chosen a Breast Cancer charity and Vicki has selected a Battered Women's shelter as their recipient organizations."

Now, we are all for discovering new wines, and we are also all for charitable donations through wine consumption. What we are decidedly not for are terrible, gaudy, overpriced wine accessories that make you look like a Martian wearing a "human woman who loves to drink wine" costume (although, kudos to anyone who figures that out for Halloween). In this spirit, we bring you 11 of the most embarrassing ways to drink wine, as furnished by Wines By Wives.

  • 1 I Love Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $19.95 from Wines By Wives

    Well, we're convinced. Please, tell us more.
  • 2 Sunflower Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $28.00 from Wines By Wives

    This tells us you probably know everything there is to know about both wine and what sunflowers look like.
  • 3 Frou-Frou Wine Charms
    Wines By Wives
    $11.95 for 6 from Wines By Wives

    Nothing enhances the wine-drinking experience like accidentally getting marabou feathers in your glass.
  • 4 Solid Pink Cheetah Painted Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $29.95 from Wines By Wives

    Because who wants to see what you're drinking, anyway?
  • 5 Faded Pink Zebra Painted Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $29.95 from Wines By Wives

    Rather than inspect the legs on our wine, we'd like to gaze lovingly at the pelt of an ombre zebra. Obviously.
  • 6 Giraffe Painted Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $29.95 from Wines By Wives

    Giraffes, for us, have always symbolized excellence in winemaking. Right? RIGHT?
  • 7 Party Diva Wine Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $19.95 from Wines By Wives

    As if they didn't know.
  • 8 Summer Celebrity Gold Cross Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $29.95 from Wines By Wives

    Gaudy, sacrilegious, and nearly $30 a glass. We'll take it.
  • 9 Mirage Cross Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $29.95 from Wines By Wives

    Scratch that -- we want the one that's wearing its own jewelry.
  • 10 Fleur De Lis Rhinestone Glass
    Wines By Wives
    $24.95 from Wines By Wives

    Well, these are on back order, so YOU'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO WAIT.
  • 11 Who Are You Drinking With T-Shirt
    Wines By Wives
    $24.95 from Wines By Wives

    We're just going to take a stab at this one: ourselves?

Want to read more from HuffPost Taste? Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest and Tumblr.

ALSO ON HUFFPOST:

Sangria Recipes

CONVERSATIONS