Daisy Coleman On The Night She Says She Was Raped: 'If God Were Real, Why Would He Do This?'

10/18/2013 10:18 am ET | Updated Oct 18, 2013

The Missouri teen at the center of the controversial "Nightmare In Maryville" rape case has revealed new details about the party she wishes never happened, the torment she suffered in her small town and the personal struggle that followed.

In a blog post published on XOJane, Daisy Coleman describes her mother finding her sprawled out on the front lawn, her hair in "icy chunks," and the painful visit to the hospital:

My mother told me she found me outside, left for dead, and when she heard me trying to get to the door, she thought it was a dog scratching. I was weak and could have died in the below freezing temperatures.

Next thing I knew, I was in the ER getting blood drawn and having various tests done. We all knew what had happened, we just wanted someone else to say it for us. The doctors examined the rape kit and verified that our nightmares were real. This nightmare, though, didn't end. It continued on for many long months. It was only later I learned that my best friend, a year younger than me, had been raped, too.

In the blog, Daisy admits that she quit praying, because "if God were real, why would he do this?" She says that she began cutting and burning herself all over her body, twice attempting to take her own life.

"My scars only come to the surface when I'm tan or cold now," Daisy writes. "It's as if over time my body learned to heal some of the ugly, but it will always be a part of me."

On Wednesday, the same Nodaway County prosecuting attorney who dropped Coleman's case announced under mounting public pressure that a special prosecutor would be appointed to review the details and charges of the alleged rape.

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