Let's hope those orange jumpsuits have a lot of breathing room.
William Gibson, 50, allegedly exposed himself outside a Goodwill store in Jensen Beach, Fla., earlier this month, then claimed he was "airing out" his penis, T.C. Palm reported Friday.
Gibson allegedly first stuck his hand down his pants and smelled his fingers before dropping his drawers. Then, according to a witness statement obtained by T.C. Palm, "All of a sudden [Gibson] just pulled down the front of his underware [sic], to expose his genitals, fluffing them."
A witness called sheriff's deputies, who say Gibson stated he was arrested merely for "airing out" his penis.
He was charged with lewd or lascivious exhibition in the presence of the elderly.
This isn't the most outlandish excuse alleged flashers have given. In February, police officers said a man caught masturbating behind a convenience store told them he was only exposed because his pants had shrunk.
And last year, a man accused of masturbating in public decided to prove he was really just scratching a rash by whipping out his testicles to show the rash to cops. The craziest thing about this excuse was that it actually worked!