While you were out stocking up on bottles of champagne and 2014 glasses (these worked much better in the aughts, before we were asked to limit our eyesight to the narrow hole in a "1," who's with me?), celebrities were being their witty selves on Twitter. Come on, did you really think they had to plan their own parties?
Don't fret, we've been monitoring to make sure you don't miss a single joke that you could drunkenly pass off as your own tonight. If Shia LaBeouf can plagiarize tweets, so can you! But you didn't hear it from us …
Friends are asking about my New Year’s plans, but drinking off-brand gin & browsing http://t.co/5PN4QhsFL2 isn’t really something you plan.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) December 30, 2013
The new year is just around the corner! In preparation, I started writing 2014 on all my checks weeks ago.
— Ellen DeGeneres (@TheEllenShow) December 30, 2013
Going into 2014, let's just all stop lying to ourselves. Kale is gross.
— Abigail Breslin (@yoabbaabba) December 31, 2013
It's New Year's Eve! Don't forget to set your clocks back.
— Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) December 31, 2013
Hey no pictures or videos of fireworks tonight please, thanks. signed, everyone on Twitter Instagram and Facebook
— David Spade (@DavidSpade) December 31, 2013
Happy New Year other side of the world...you're so ahead of everyone else, good for you!
— Lisa Kudrow (@LisaKudrow) December 31, 2013
The period between Christmas and New Years is the taint of the holidays.
— Lance Bass (@LanceBass) December 30, 2013
Whether you're a Belieber or a Gervatheist, I wish you a very Happy New Year. Peace :)
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) December 31, 2013
2014 Resolution - I need to work on being a less controversial tweeter.
— Shia LaBeouf (@thecampaignbook) December 31, 2013
Let's just cancel New Year's Eve
— Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) December 31, 2013