We love clothes -- coveting them, shopping for them, styling them, devoting our lives to them.
But sometimes, clothes are the worst. Thus we hereby present our list of garment grievances, ranked by awfulness -- and if anyone out there can invent an easy solution to any of these problems, we will basically give you all our money.
#17: When the fabric of your jeans rubs thin between your thighs
It's like our pants are taunting us.
#16: Static-y scarves
Also: Static-y hair.
#15: When your jeans fade only in the knees
What are you supposed to do, not bend your legs?
#14: Itchy tags
Why aren't all tags made of, like, cashmere?
#13: When crumbs get lodged in the corners of your pockets
It's like we're being punished for being messy eaters.
#12: Sweaters that literally snag every time you wear them
Walking suddenly becomes an occupational hazard.
#11: Oversized tags that poke out the bottom hems of your shirts
As if we really needed extra material at our hips.
#10: Belts that won't actually stay on your waist
They have just one job to do...
#9: Yoga pants that pill at the crotch
As if we didn't feel self-conscious enough wearing leggings...
#8: When your skinny jeans stretch out but just in the butt
There must be a limit on how many times you can re-shrink jeans in the dryer.
#7: Sweaters that shed on everything
This is what cats must feel like every day.
#6: Jeans that rub blue dye all over your shoes
Also known as White Sneaker Ruiners.
#5: Skirts that ride up so when you stand up, your undies are showing
These garments are probably the reason underwear exists.
#4: Long shirt sleeves that bunch up when you put your jacket on
This is always followed by an awkward lunge up your jacket sleeve to retrieve your shirt.
#3: Sweaters that pill after, like, a day
Why does this even happen??
#2: Shirts with high arm holes that get your deodorant all over them
At least we smell good?
#1: When your jeans zipper will close 98 percent then refuses to go the other 2 percent so it always looks like your fly's open
We give up.
While we're at it, let's banish these items: