03/06/2014 02:56 pm ET | Updated Mar 06, 2014

We Can't Even With Martha Stewart's Sex Advice

Matt Sayles/Invision/AP

Martha Stewart gave some absolutely incredible sex advice during a Reddit AMA on Thursday.

As she dictated words to her gay assistant Pierre from her gilded bathtub while sipping crisp Chardonnay and treating her skin to a Susan Ciminelli Hydrating Gel Mask,* she said:

"Don't forget to brush your teeth."

She also advised: "Always take a bath before and after."

Martha also offered cooking tips, invited Snoop to join the discussion, and asked "What's a dildo?"

For the full Q&A, click here.

*This is 100% made up but we like to imagine that's how it went down.

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