If you're not following legendary sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer on Twitter, you are robbing yourself of some serious joy.
The German-born 85-year-old offers smart perspective for hard times, as she knows them well. Polar vortex got you down? Have sex. Favorite TV show got cancelled? More time for sex! Not attracted to Abraham Lincoln? That's OK (and you're not alone).
Dr. Ruth is a realist. Sure, life is full of highs and plenty of lows. But often the only remedy you need is healthy sex, along with a lighthearted attitude, to reel you back up from rock bottom. For virtually any problem that's got you down, @AskDrRuth has you covered.
When you are feeling particularly devastated about 2014's lime shortage:
Is lime shortage putting crimp on your Cinco de Mayo? You don't need limes to have sex so skip margarita & celebrate in bed!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) May 5, 2014
When you're experiencing self-consciousness about your "bikini body:"
Just because you don't think your body is ready for the beach this summer doesn't mean it's not ready for sex tonight!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 29, 2014
When you spiral into that dark, fearful place wondering what it will be like to get older:
Here's photo of me and Marc Anthony pic.twitter.com/SklKNdTa9O
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 17, 2014
(You've got nothing to worry about.)
Saw Marc Anthony concert from 1st row. He blew me kisses & I gave him two hugs backstage as he said 1 wasn't enough.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 17, 2014
When ibuprofen isn't helping:
For example did you know sex can actually cure a headache? http://t.co/XlX4S2F5bY
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) January 15, 2014
When you've become attached to your phone and also feel bloated:
Moral is if you spend more time having sex & less time on cell and eating you'll have better sex. Seems obvious.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 4, 2014
When you're concerned about your son's well-being:
If young man taking too long in the bathroom, probably masturbating so don't bang on the door otherwise rushing may get ingrained
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 29, 2014
When you couldn't find a bright side to the Polar Vortex:
Positive aspect of polar vortex: if guy is shivering his penis might act a bit like a vibrator.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 26, 2014
Dr. Ruth will keep you in check:
Stop complaining about the weather. Nothing you can do. You can improve your sex life however so get to work.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 4, 2014
Seriously, weather will probably never get in the way again:
Temps to drop here on the East Coast. Upsetting I know unless you focus on "drop" & think of pants and panties doing same
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) March 12, 2014
When you feel out of place because you're not sexually attracted to one of the most famous U.S. presidents:
Going to luncheon where I'll be learning a lot about Abe Lincoln. As President's go, he's a bit too tall for me!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 29, 2014
When for a split second you let yourself be concerned about the damn thigh gap:
Seems lots of women concerned w/thigh gap. I say as long as partner fits in your gap all is fine. Stop worrying about silly inches
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) November 21, 2013
When you're conflicted about the NSA and your love for gaming:
If u have Xbox w/kinect ur cable co could be watching u. So either cover up in front of it or else put on a show worth watching!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) June 14, 2013
When you're debating whether or not to shave down there:
Normcore of Pubes http://t.co/CShk3rjTZv All I have to say is that you can enjoy sex with or without pubic hair. Isn't that a relief.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 3, 2014
When you're getting a little too distracted by late-night TV:
Congrats to @jimmyfallon for reinvigorating The Tonight Show. Just don't let him ruin your sex life. If necessary have sex earlier.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 18, 2014
When you need a push to ask for that raise:
It seems the more sex you have the higher your wages. http://t.co/xlF9nJ86Tv As if you needed more incentive to sex.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) August 16, 2013
When rent is due and you're feeling blue:
Consumer spending is rising. If you can't afford to spend more I know some activities you could do that don't cost a cent!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) March 28, 2014
When you're having trouble sleeping:
One way to get a good night's sleep - have sex first!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) April 23, 2014
When you think you're the only one who gets a little horny in the middle of the week:
I know the phrase Hump Day has nothing to do with sex but be honest, do you just think "Wednesday" when you hear it?
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) October 23, 2013
When you're wondering just how one goes about twerking:
Do condoms make twerking safer? No but spanx might make twerking more appealing.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) September 3, 2013
When you beat yourself up about oversleeping:
If you overslept this morning hope it was because you were having fun in bed last night & not just because it was darker.
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) March 10, 2014
When you're unimpressed by the Chinese calendar:
So it's #yearofthehorse. I still contend size doesn't matter!
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) January 31, 2014
When you're contemplating the effects of Daylight Saving Time:
Notice the days are getting longer? No? That's good as I don't want you staring out the window but looking partner in the eyes
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) January 7, 2014
When you think there's nothing that could pull you out of that rut:
#throwbackthursday pic.twitter.com/QUgatzFaZi
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) May 8, 2014