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07/11/2014 02:52 pm ET | Updated Jul 14, 2014

Somewhere In Brooklyn Right Now, There Is A Pregnant Tarantula On The Loose

A pregnant, Mexican Red Rump tarantula is crawling its way through Brooklyn.

According to a flyer spotted in South Slope and posted onto Reddit for the world to collectively gasp at, the "mostly harmless" creature recently went missing and her owner is now seeking a safe return.

"She's mostly active at night and likes to hide in dark corners. She shouldn't bite, but sometimes jumps when frightened," the absolutely unreassuring poster reads.

Of course, the flyer could very well be a hoax. Either way, we encourage you to be vigilant. As these unscientific Yahoo posts indicate, the Penelopes of the world are known to lay anywhere between 400 and 1000 eggs between the months of July and September, which is yes, right now. If Penelope's existence is in fact true, her imminent newborns could very well take a cue from the following:

Update: Penelope was indeed a big, unnecessary lie.

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