In 2009, I landed a book deal to write about what I felt was (still) the final frontier for feminists in their personal lives: how to be in a relationship and maintain your independence. I had just broken up with my boyfriend and was starting to realize that being in a couple may not have been for me. In looking for guidance, I turned foolishly to the self-help aisles of bookstores, only to find the shelves lined with harangues on how to make myself perfect for Prince Charming. How was it possible that publishers were still peddling sexist messages to women about how best to find love? So I wrote a book.