The best of Broadway gathered Monday night (their one night off, host Billy Crystal joked) to celebrate Hillary Clinton, the presidential candidate most likely to get a free ticket to “Hamilton.”
“Broadway for Hillary” featured an impressive cast of recognizable faces from Hollywood and the Great White Way. Yes, Neil Patrick Harris was there. So was Hugh Jackman. (And Alan Cumming, Bernadette Peters, Dame Helen F**king Mirren ... the list goes on.)
Speaking of “Hamilton,” Lin-Manuel Miranda showed up with his former costar Renée Elise Goldsberry to perform a rewritten version of the song “The World Was Wide Enough.” It’s not difficult to draw parallels between the politics of two centuries ago and the politics of today ― stolen correspondence, foreign meddling, a rich and entitled New Yorker running for office, etc. But in case you were having trouble, the original stars of the “Hamilton” musical are here to help with a useful parody.
Below are the entire lyrics of the rewritten song listed as “The World Was Wide Enough” in the program (though some are referring to it as a “Ten Duel Commandments” parody), as sung by Miranda and Goldsberry:
One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine
There are ten things you need to do (number one!)You register to vote and it’s on
You post that Hillary sign up on your lawn (number two!)Call some undecideds in your crew
Your cousins in Ohio maybe try and flip ‘em blue (number three!)Watch Hillary examine the terrain
Watch her campaign with the man Tim Kaine
Tim Kaine in the membrane
Tim Kaine in the brain (number four!)Hillary makes each decision
Looking at the world from a rarefied position
A public servant with tenacity, agility
Mi gente, experience is not a liability (number five!)Now we all know this is the time
When the other side tries to fly low we go high (six!)We know that our Hillary is no quitter
We watch as her opponent sits and fiddles with his Twitter (seven!)Confession time? All in a burst
I want to vote for a candidate who puts our kids first (November 8!)Your last chance to participate
Roll up to your polling place, vote up in your home state
It’s down to the nitty gritty
Three weeks to go, are you ready New York City?Yes, in a world gone berserk
Hillary rolls up her sleeves and goes to work!
I have only one overwhelming feeling
Anybody here wanna shatter a glass ceiling? (nine!)Look them in the eye, clear your throat
Summon all the time you can devote
Then count (one-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine-number-ten, paces, vote!)
Some other highlights from the night: Ayodele Casel’s tap dance performance, Harris’ “Origin of Love” rendition (accompanied by ballerina Stella Abrera), Barbra Streisand as the voice of God, Jon Hamm and Jake Gyllenhaal’s “It Can’t Happen Here” skit, Sarah Jessica Parker and Andrea McArdle’s “Annie” homage, Cynthia Erivo’s absolutely arresting “Battle Hymn of the Republic,” Angela Basset’s reading of “Ain’t I a Woman?” and Julia Roberts’ f-bombs.
The event, held at the St. James Theater in New York City, streamed on YouTube Monday. Despite the seemingly endless hellscape that is this election season, for just a moment, the world was a little happier. Or, at least, filled with more show tunes.
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