Old? No, We're Just Older

I remember the Life magazine that came out the week I became a "grown up." That was, of course, when I turned 13, and, therefore, knew more than anyone, was finally old enough not to be treated as a child, and the whole world belonged to my generation.

A "Quartet of Bing Crosby's Boys" was on the Life cover. I had crushes on a couple of those boys and thought there must be many more like them available to a new teenager. Ironically, decades later, my husband and I bought the house where Bing's "quartet" was brought up.

Life was full of good news for newly-grown-up teens like me. Although never dreaming we would be called "Baby Boomers" in our 50s and 60s, we did know life would be sweet.

Vacuuming would be easy for we future housewives of America. General Electric's latest "work-saving features at no extra cost" included the Cord Reel Cleaner, so "no more messy tangled cords" would waste women's time.

Boeing announced it was about to introduce a new plane, so people could cruise in a "restful, serenely quiet" atmosphere with no vibration.

Bargains were everywhere. We could even be rewarded for having a sore throat. Life advertised, "Cracker Jack free with Smith Brothers 3-pack."

Houses were going to be bigger and easier to maintain. Simoniz Vinyl Floor Wax was introduced in a "gay new container," and Norge introduced the "world's first truly automatic washer."

Ah, life would be great, youthful and easy, according to "Life."

I had no worries when the Beatles wondered about life "when I'm 64," or when the Who sang they hoped to "die before I get old." We were never getting old.

The media (yes, I'll blame the media, of course) disagrees.

Businessweek has a story and chart called, "How To Drive like an Old Guy," with a drawing of a man that shows how Nissan's engineers are donning "old" suits that simulate the effects of aging. Among the simulations are "cataract goggles" (to impair vision); neck restraint (for restricting range of motion); elbow restraints (to limit arm flexibility); knee straps (to mimic stiffness); "raised toe" footwear (to diminish sense of balance); waist belt (mimics thicker midriff and discomfort behind the wheel), and other items such as gloves and body casts.

Ouch! And, then, just in case we wanted to write this off to one company just being prepared for when we aged another 40 or 50 years, the Wall Street Journal ran a headline, "Designing for Senior Surge: Makes of Appliances, Bath Fixtures Target Aging Boomers; Cooking for the Forgetful."

Our maladies are universal. GE is shown simulating factors for cooking that deaden the sense of touch. A company is testing font sizes, colors, sounds and touch for display panel designers. Delta has a faucet that just needs to be tapped to turn off or on. Other examples are lowering products for "older backs," producing toilets that can be lowered or raised by touching a button and equipment to prevent tub or sink floods and cookware temperatures to prevent boil-overs by forgetful new oldsters.

We felt so mature at 13. Now, I wish I was mature enough to appreciate, rather than resent, the anticipation of increasing physical problems as we age. Maybe Microsoft or IBM is working on that now.

Comments

[Newyorkgal]

My mother had that vacuum cleaner, an automatic washer and even an early remote control TV (giant cords and all). We were so grown up and hopeful. I'm all for more comfortable cars and sink heights that don't hurt my back. I just wish today's teenagers had optimistic futures like ours ahead of them. I sure like the nostalgia.

[QueenCeleste]

I recently read that there will be a shortage of doctors to treat the geriatric set. I guess that's a good field of specialization for those in medical school.

I suddenly felt advanced in years when I suddenly realized one day that I was older than my doctors, bank clerks, most shop clerks, police, fire fighters, waiters--even politicians (well, except Hillary and McCain). As I did when a helpful young bag boy at the grocery store offered "Would you like some help out to your car M'am?" And just a couple years before I'd been carded while buying spirits. From youngish chick to aged dame in barely the wink of an eye--disconcerting to put it mildly!

[ohjaygee]

cont: The result being that our lives and all that we are or strive to be today, are constantly being subjectively measured or judged or scrutinized or controlled or accomplished in nano-seconds, or less " and yet in doing so, in attempting to compress ever more into ever less, and despite every counter-the-ageing process youth enhancer available, we"re simply hastening the onset of being increasingly mature, of reaching a sell-by date that much earlier " through becoming increasingly less objective, free-thinking or original - and ultimately becoming old and older. You"ve reminded me that I do miss those days when "Life" featuring the people of America, pre Vietnam of course, was the centre of my world, presenting an instant, even if it was possibly a somewhat dated monthly world view, one that subsequently provided months and years of treasured wonder and inspiration. Despite my being a lot more mature now (of course), they are memories that are surprisingly as focused as they were in my youth, and seemingly unencumbered with subjective agendas as "Life"s" images from that time were, when the world was a lot younger, yet seemingly a lot more mature as well. A time when age, happily just possibly, happened elsewhere in Life but never in "Life".

[ohjaygee]

cont: Once we were subsequently finally granted the "privilege" of being exposed to television, and naturally as I "grew older", my regular reliance upon "Life" for my world-views and outlook and opinions rapidly and sadly diminished " ditto albeit not unexpectedly, the continued survival of the magazine as well. And so too, without really wanting to acknowledge it, but ultimately not being able to avoid this inevitability as I matured, so too the concurrent evolvement of my reference became the accepted norm " as did the demands and pressures for more and more. So from "Life" once a month to a 24/7 blanket coverage of life, ultimately instructing us in life as to where we are or have to be today " or need to strive towards - we"ve in the process somehow become a much more "mature-orientated" place, one that constantly evolves and involves, entails and demands of us, in the need to become a world that"s increasingly ever more immediate and present - and thus intrusively real, with the media"s relentless and ultimate quest of packaging and thus sanitizing their perceived ever altering ideals of life (bearing in mind the ratings of course).

[ohjaygee]

During my formative youthful years, or thereabout-ish, "Life" magazine was literally the centre of mine. Being raised in South Africa, we never had access to "television" (yup I can still clearly recall listening to a delayed "wireless" broadcast of "¦one small step for man¦"), as it was deemed to be a "communist tool" or some such equally crazy notion " and thus forbidden. However we used to receive "Life", thanks to the foresight, very unique and privileged in hindsight, of my parents who subscribed to the mag, each treasured issue being delivered by "airmail". All the way from America to Africa, at the time even this being a concept of never ending fascination and marvel for me. It was of course always a much anticipated and significant day when "Life" was delivered, as it enabled mine to become a part of the real world, aka USA. My knowledge and understanding of this world was literally based upon what used to be contained within Life"s large-format living pages " including the fact that everyone, or certainly those living in the USA, always seemed to be depicted as being successful, happy, free, in love, good looking, smiling, sophisticated, wealthy, living life to the full, etc " and of course perpetually young. That idyllic image altered forever during the period of the Vietnam War, as a result of the harsh reality I became exposed to through "Life"s" coverage of that conflict; particularly the photography that I still remember so clearly.

[manndan]

Having just finished a cross-country trip in a Scion I'm glad to hear that Nissan is addressing the comfort of us geezers.

[OnTheCusp]

Yeah, GenX and Y will get old too, and by then, you old boomers will have perfected the face lift, tummy tuck, butt lift, etc. But it won't matter to them, because they won't get a cent of social security and will still be paying off the bills of the "Me Generation," the greedy, it's-all-about-us-generation, the screw-the-rest-of-the-generations generation, also known as the "baby boomers."
If they're smart, the X'ers and Y'ers will start businesses that capitalize on the never to be deflated boomer egos and then just maybe they'll get back some of the money the boomers have selfishly hogged to themselves.
Honestly, if GenX or Y had the vast number of "members" that the boomers had, the world would be all about THEM. There is nothing inherently "special" about boomers except there were so many of them. Boomers did not change the world, they just arrived "in numbers too big to ignore." (With all respect to Helen Reddy!) But nothing has really changed. Women are still second class citizens and gays are still ostracized. We can all talk about it now, but the generation that protested the war in Viet Nam sent us to war in Iraq out of sold out fear and greed for oil. I suggest that the boomers take a hard look at themselves and think about what they can really offer the people and the planet during the 21st century.

[marignymitch]

Hey! It's not the Boomers' fault that members of GenX and Y weren't smart enough to be born in our generation.

[OnTheCusp]

That's all you've got, huh? Membership in "The Club." Wow.

[jeff01]

Ouch is right. I blame Paul McCartney for predicting we'd all turn 64.

[kaseybandit]

My vacuum cleaner cord still gets tangled, and I somehow missed those airplanes that didn't make noise. I don't like the idea of these products for us oldies but goodies, but I'll take them. It's some consolation knowing those x-ers and y-ers will experience this, too.

[Chip1222]

Recently read a study that 80 year olds are happier than people in their 20s. Yes, we have aches and pains, but we're smarter, too. All I have to do now is make sure I turned off the stove and drive slower. Thanks for the giggles.

[ThreeCentsWorth]

Saw that Business Week story with the drawing of the model with impaired vision, touch, mobility, etc. It made me hurt. I don't hope to die before I get old, but hope not to get old. Where's the fun of Life Mag when we need it most? Mrs. Spelling -- Do you have any spare tickets for the Love Boat?