Dancing With Clay Aiken?

12/02/2010 05:12 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

So ABC-TV casting executives are wracking out their brains as to who they can cast for the next season of Dancing With Has-Beens... I mean... Dancing With The Stars. They are wigging as to how to top the Bristol Palin coup d'états. Word is that DWTS was originally after Todd Palin for this past season and that Sarah Palin, in her unyielding control freak way, offered up Bristol Palin as a peace offering with the intention to bring grace back to the out of wedlock teenage mom. Let's face it, Bristol, left to her own devices would just as quickly cast herself on that MTV Sixteen and Pregnant reality show.

So who would be a good topper to Bristol? You know that David Hasselhoff's (The Hoff) daughter, Hayley will be cast... but she will NOT cause as much of a stir and the Republican Party will not obsessively vote for her like they did Bristol. So who else? Naturally, ABC is running to their piggy bank to see if they can scrape up enough dough to entice Kim Kardashian... but... hopefully she will have enough sense to pass on this. Though I bet her mother, Kris, is going to offer herself up. Again, she ain't no Bristol... and will provide no Republican sweeps. Susan Boyle might be a good one... but is so koo-koo that she would be more trouble than it's worth. I guess they should start pawing through the American Idol alum because they could surely use a boost and Lord knows their middle American fans have nothing else to do but eat and call 800 numbers incessantly. So we are talking Rubin Studdard, or Clay Aiken.

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