Aisling Carroll

My pen hovers over "The Help" and "The Tree of Life" on my fake Oscar ballot. I can't decide what bubbles to shade in under Best Picture, Best Director or Best Actress, because I haven't seen these emotionally charged movies. I shun them. My movie picks these days are less...

With one eye open and one closed -- it feels like an energy saver -- I stare at the eBay page and click on "Sell an item." I slump low in my chair and type out my ad: "Broken (but spirited) body seeks new owner." I weigh inserting an exclamation...

"I invite you to consider your life wheel," says the lithe, springy-haired leader of this goal-setting seminar. "Is each part of the wheel equally inflated? Does it roll?"

I look down at my wobbly-looking wheel on the lilac piece of paper in front of me with amusement....

I sit on my living room floor, lean my head back against my green couch and try to focus. Squint-eyed, I gaze up in awe at Katy, who sits above me and holds my cell phone like a bolt of lightning while she effortlessly dials Comcast. I think she might...

I drive past my HMO's "increase your laugh expectancy" bulletin board. I swear and stare down at chaotic pages of doctors' reports, which teeter across the hand brake of my car. As I jerk my head back up to the freeway in front of me, I recite phrases from the...

With an impressive amount of Cha Cha blush on my cheeks, I lie down flat on my hardwood floor. As I hoist my legs up against the living room wall, I admire my new skinny jeans. This pre-date pose ensures I won't swoon around Scott, literally. It wards against blackouts.