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AKMuckraker

AKMuckraker

Posted February 26, 2009 | 02:02 AM (EST)

Witches and Demons and Republicans....Oh My!


I know that there are many Republicans out there, who think that Sarah Palin is a complete "whack job" (to quote a source in the McCain campaign). I know this because I just had dinner with one of them the other night. My impression was that she voted for Obama, almost out of desperation, because she wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing Sarah Palin was a heartbeat away from the presidency.

I'm sure many of those people watched Governor Bobby Jindal's response to Obama's speech tonight hoping that there was, indeed, and up and coming young Republican that wasn't....well....embarrassing. His underwhelming performance was more than a little bit "me me me" and quite devoid on actual policy. It was a pretty obvious opening act to his 2012 campaign. And, he didn't mention veterans. And he mocked volcano preparedness (was that just to tick off the land of Palin?) And he tried to use Hurricane Katrina as a Republican talking point, and that story may in fact be a lie. And he didn't really exude sincerity either.

OK, let's face it. That speech was pretty damn bad. But these people are desperate for SOMEone. And he's still a relief from the whiny, hand-wringing, gun totin', winkin', cookie bakin', spotlight hoggin' Wasilla gal with the crazy witch hunting pastor. You remember that guy, right? Pastor Muthee from Africa (which is a continent by the way, not a country) who came to fame and fortune by driving a witch, menacingly named "Mama Jane" from a village, after killing the demon in the form of a python she kept as a pet. The one who flew multiple times to Wasilla and prayed the witches away from Sarah Palin, while she stood at the altar with arms extended and palms toward heaven. Then he asked Wasillans to pray that God would take over the banks and the schools and the businesses and the minds of the little children, and of course, the government. Still don't remember him? Here's a reminder.

2:57 - First mention of Sarah

5:00 - We need God to 'take over the education system.'

5:27 - We need God to 'take over the media' and Hollywood itself.

6:08 - We need the government run by born-again Christians.

6:58 - Praying for Sarah to become governor (Doesn't this impact their tax-exempt status? Anyone?)

7:12 - Sarah herself enters and is "prayed upon".

8:38 - Another witchcraft reference.

Doesn't it seem even weirder now than it did back in October?

So, yeah. Those Republicans I mention, are looking long and hard at Jindal. After last night's performance, they may not be dancing in the streets, but at least he's not the star of that video clip above.

Not so fast, my disenchanted conservative friends.

This came to my attention, and made me start to wonder what exactly is IN that red Kool-Aid? This has just got to make you wonder.

Let's wind the Bobby Jindal time machine back to 1994, when he wrote an article entitled...are you ready? Are you sitting down? "Beating a Demon: Physical Dimensions of Spiritual Warfare."

No, this was not some term paper for a creative writing class, or an abstract for Comparative World Religions or Cultural Anthropology. This was an actual true-to-life story; a personal narrative, if you will. Yup. Bobby Jindal - Demon Beater. Spiritual Warrior. Exorcist Extraordinaire. Who knew? Did he put this on his resume under "Skills and Talents"?

The original article will cost you money to see at The New Oxford Review. But for those of you not wanting to part with your hard earned $1.50, here are some of the highlights.

Some background first. Jindal's best friend Susan has not been doing well. She's been diagnosed with skin cancer, and her behavior has become strange and erratic. She is surrounded by "sulphurous smells," and has come to a prayer meeting for help.

Jindal writes:

The students, led by Susan's sister and Louise, a member of a charismatic church, engaged in loud and desperate prayers while holding Susan with one hand. Kneeling on the ground, my friends were chanting, "Satan, I command you to leave this woman." Others exhorted all "demons to leave in the name of Christ." It is no exaggeration to note the tears and sweat among those assembled. Susan lashed out at the assembled students with verbal assaults.

Whenever I concentrated long enough to begin prayer, I felt some type of physical force distracting me. It was as if something was pushing down on my chest, making it very hard for me to breathe. . . Though I could find no cause for my chest pains, I was very scared of what was happening to me and Susan. I began to think that the demon would only attack me if I tried to pray or fight back; thus, I resigned myself to leaving it alone in an attempt to find peace for myself.

It appeared as if we were observing a tremendous battle between the Susan we knew and loved and some strange evil force. But the momentum had shifted and we now sensed that victory was at hand.While Alice and Louise held Susan, her sister continued holding the Bible to her face. Almost taunting the evil spirit that had almost beaten us minutes before, the students dared Susan to read biblical passages. She choked on certain passages and could not finish the sentence "Jesus is Lord." Over and over, she repeated "Jesus is L..L..LL," often ending in profanities. In between her futile attempts, Susan pleaded with us to continue trying and often smiled between the grimaces that accompanied her readings of Scripture. Just as suddenly as she went into the trance, Susan suddenly reappeared and claimed "Jesus is Lord."

With an almost comical smile, Susan then looked up as if awakening from a deep sleep and asked, "Has something happened?" She did not remember any of the past few hours and was startled to find her friends breaking out in cheers and laughter, overwhelmed by sudden joy and relief.


I leave you with this thought to ponder. Why are these two the new great hopes of the Republican Party; the shining stars; the young energetic faces of the GOP's future? If this is the case, the best movie analogy may not be "The Exorcist". It just might be "Night of the Living Dead."

Dems, just sit tight and don't be corrupt. The world is yours.

I know that there are many Republicans out there, who think that Sarah Palin is a complete "whack job" (to quote a source in the McCain campaign). I know this because I just had dinner with one of th...
I know that there are many Republicans out there, who think that Sarah Palin is a complete "whack job" (to quote a source in the McCain campaign). I know this because I just had dinner with one of th...
 
 
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06:39 PM on 02/28/2009
As a Christian I have to say this Jindal exorcism story is just nuts. But then the right wing pseudo Christian thing is just nuts. As for "leaders" of the GOP-they do seem to be in a quandry. Now they have Joe the Plumber and that 13 year old child prodigy. Jesus did say "when the blind lead the blind, they both fall into the ditch."
11:37 AM on 02/27/2009
OK it's now time to update the Republican anthem... 'ew ee ew ah ah ting tang wasilla wasilla bing bang'. You can find the rest on Limewire song 'Witch Doctor'.

You're welcome!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CamJam
07:16 AM on 02/27/2009
Great read as always AKMuckraker!

I'll never figure out the republicans... they just can't see the forest for the trees.
IMHO, (now I am just talking as an Independent voter of many years, turned Democrat March 2008 to be able to vote in the Oregon primaries) I thought Chuck Hagel was the only one that could have saved the Republican party. It's no wonder he's retired now... and that's sad for the Republicans and for America.
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MajorKong
If the pilot's good, see, I mean if he's reeeally
09:15 PM on 02/26/2009
I love Jesus. It's his fan club that really creeps me out sometimes.
ThinkCreeps
Seriously, it's time.
01:28 AM on 02/27/2009
You're right - this poor Jesus guy keeps being forsaken.
11:44 AM on 02/27/2009
Great comment!
ThePeacemakers
Concerned Citizen
07:35 PM on 02/26/2009
Elmer Gantry.
'Nuff said.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
phoenixdoglover
My dog loves my progressive treats agenda
09:39 PM on 02/26/2009
Just read it. A timely and startling depiction of the forces and personalities behind evangelical Christianity...only written almost 100 years ago! This has been going on way too long.
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
zoozey
07:23 PM on 02/26/2009
Egads. Poor Susan. Here she is battling skin cancer, probably on chemo or some sort of meds that are causing this "sulphuric smell," probably acting "strange due to HAVING CANCER, and she gets tackled to the floor by a bunch of nin.compo.ops. No wonder she couldn't get the words out-----only profanity....!!! Probably just gave in to them and declared she was "cured," just so they would leave her the he## alone!
11:46 AM on 02/27/2009
Or she is mentally ill, like many through history who had "visions"

Famous nun, Hildagard of Bingen, made lovely music, but she has epileptic seizures mistaken for visions from god. Whomever wrote the book of Revelations was also most likely mentally ill or had taken some excellent mushrooms.
02:41 AM on 02/28/2009
That Revelations inspiration would be mandrake, the old world relative of Charlie Manson's psycho-delic nightshade of preference (Jimson Weed).
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Rockwell
Recovering Reagan republican. 26 years sober.
06:42 PM on 02/26/2009
So Jindal's friend was surround by "sulphurous smells"?

If that's a sign of demon possession then I'm going to have to douse my brother with Holy Water.
07:12 PM on 02/26/2009
LOL rockwell!
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
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06:36 PM on 02/26/2009
"Dems, just sit tight and don't be corrupt. The world is yours."

Best line of the whole piece.
06:54 PM on 02/26/2009
I agree.
06:25 PM on 02/26/2009
Wow. The worst part is that Jindal is well-educated face of the Republican party. Can it really be that even their brightest leaders are prone to believing in demons while rejecting science? Maybe he thinks prayer will stop volcanos from errupting.
09:40 AM on 02/27/2009
being well educated does not make you smart.
I.E our former president a Yale graduate
06:06 PM on 02/26/2009
Hey folks, the corporate media is at it again, they are doing the same thing they did with President Obama Recovery Package. They have the republicians out in full force complaining about President Obama 2010 Budget and as usual, the republicans are using their same scare tactics and misinformation. The GOP is fighting hard for corporations and the lobbyists are coming out in big numbers. It's a shame their voters don't realize they could care less about them except when it time to vote.

If we find any Dems fighting against the President, we should automatically look at who's lobbying them.
05:59 PM on 02/26/2009
Great post, AKM.

Your use of humor and wit makes entertaining reading...... but also serves to emphasize the darkness of your topic. Well done.
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GayGrandpa
05:48 PM on 02/26/2009
Dear Jesus please protect me from your followers!
05:33 PM on 02/26/2009
A mistake that some folks make, me included, is to think that these folks dont really believe
in this kind of vodoo, they are just trying to look good for the "base"....or something......that would be a mistake!
Never doubt a person who says they believe in creationism, demons, angels etc.
It does not matter if they are Christian, Muslim, jew etc.
They REALLY do believe this mythology...and are willing to hurt you if you DONT.
They do not think like you or me or even their co-mythologists, witness the plethora of
church's, mosques, temples, sects and denomonations...they cant even get it straight among themself's!
Then, when you challenge them with....rational logic or anything close to it, thats when the piles of sticks are gathered together...its witch burning time! And you, (not Pastor Muthee?) are the main course...
05:18 PM on 02/26/2009
Great to see you here, AKMuckraker...

More info...on Palin...and the witchdoctor mentioned...

http://www.talk2action.org/story/2008/11/5/13585/8320/

Thanks, again, AKMuckraker!!!
04:21 PM on 02/26/2009
I would not be so biased to assume that only Republicans believe in God. There are many Democrats who believe in God, pray to God and go to church religiously. There are many evangelicals and other religious groups that vote for the Democratic Party.

The democratic goes too far sometimes. Folks like you give the democratic party a bad name as much as Rush Limbaugh often makes the Republic appear to have a couple of thousands members. You may not like Governor Jindal, but don’t deny that his messa was a simple reminder of what this country is about.

The Democratic Party, since the 08 presidential elections, has been talking down the economy. I’m sure you’ve heard of that saying, be careful for you wish for because you might get it. The Democratic Party has gotten exactly what it had been wishing for – a RECESSION. There’s not enough Prozac to give to everyone of us, a show of faith is a bad thing. This country needs to be rebooted. A message of hope and of belief in America is what is needed now.
It’s time to reboot the United States of America and bring back hope, courage, pride, ethics and morality.

As for Governor Palin, no matter how un-informed people think she is, for as long as this country is a free country, Governor Palin has the right to speak
04:42 PM on 02/26/2009
Say what? The democrats got what they were wishing for? Where diid you hear that....Rush Limbaugh by chance? Are you frickin' kidding me. Ignorance....plain ignorance.

As for the message of hope and belief in America that you said we need so much right now. Why do you think Obama won? Look at the fear and hate that Palin and McCain used during the campaign. Why do you think they lost? People were looking for hope and Obama offered that hope not hate.

On the other hand, you have the GOP leader, Rush, saying that he hopes Obama fails. Wow...there is hope we can all believe in.....he is hoping the President fails so we all fail.
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pfrogger
04:50 PM on 02/26/2009
agreed many people, Repubs and Dems believe in God.

As for Jindal's message, please tell me you're kidding. "a simple reminder of what this country is about."? Really? He brought up Katrina and why the government is the problem?
His party was responsible for that catastrophe. In case you missed it, the "greatest" country in the world responded to that disaster with the efficiency worse than a third world country.
We had the supplies!!!
They got very close to the people!!!
They were turned away!!! TURNED AWAY!!!
People suffered and died, not because we couldn't respond, but because the government actually prevented the help!!!

Guess which party was in charge? Which party's leader chose a person completely incompetent for the job (he was a horse trader for God's sake, and he was put in charge of the Federal Emergency Response? you can't make this stuff up!)
and he's talking about the government? his party? really? and what about now, he's governor? New Orleans is still a mess, the levies have NOT been fully repaired. places that make money are fixed, and poor places look like war zones.

and don't tell me the Dems wanted a recession when the Repubs and their free market voodoo actually caused it. on their watch! the buck stops where?! Politicians, Dems and Repubs are to blame, but the Repubs were in charge for 6 out of 8 years.
so please tell me about "pride, ethics and morality" when the Repubs were in charge