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Alan Black
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Alan Black is 50 and works in a bar. He'll be slinging drinks until Last Call.

Entries by Alan Black

Notes From a Dive Bar - High There!

(0) Comments | Posted April 27, 2016 | 12:43 AM

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The rocket fuel of weed and whisky. A plastered man says, You know, if they smoked a joint in the lunar module when they first landed on the moon, it would have been a real buzz Aldrin.

You are a lunartic, I...

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Notes From a Dive Bar -- The Lonely Whisky

(0) Comments | Posted April 19, 2016 | 5:36 PM

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For a while, I've been noticing this shot of whisky abandoned on the bar. A napkin covers the rim, a message printed upon it.

Call me! Then, a number.
All around, the world spins.

Screwdrivers twist over it, greyhounds run...

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Notes From a Dive Bar -- The Sporting Life

(0) Comments | Posted April 11, 2016 | 8:35 PM

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Arriving from beyond, it is Bill. He died a year ago. He sat on the same stool every night until sports killed him.

Baseball, football, basketball, NASCAR -- all four took his soul. It's all he lived for. He swapped caps depending on...

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Blackout Is Over

(0) Comments | Posted April 8, 2016 | 6:15 PM

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A four month blackout on Notes From a Dive Bar.
Now returning with news of a fight.

Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna. My hands in prayer mode, shouting Hare Krishna. Peace. Peace. A flying punch whistles past my nose. The...

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Notes From a Dive Bar -- New Year's Eve

(0) Comments | Posted January 1, 2016 | 6:10 AM

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It's the most wonderful time of the year. No it isn't. Not for bartenders cleaning up the sprays of joviality.

Lying at the bottom of the stairs, a young woman, robbed of decency. Her bum is...

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Notes From a Dive Bar: Ulysses Walks Into a Bar

(0) Comments | Posted December 14, 2015 | 11:57 AM

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Ulysses walks into a bar, sort of...

Talk. Talk. Talk. Sticky mouths moving, shapes and shapeless lips, tongues tremble, then later some kissing and more to come if lust legs it. What are my words? Yes. Next. Thank you. Repeat....

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Notes From a Dive Bar L -- Anti-Social Media

(0) Comments | Posted December 7, 2015 | 5:49 PM

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He's had enough, he says, he's going to end it.
I say, think again, but he's adamant.
Is there an emergency number to call for a drunk about to delete his Twitter account?
He has 12 followers.
Hey, look,...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XLIX -- Disappear

(0) Comments | Posted November 29, 2015 | 2:18 AM

Scott, they never found him. Trays of French cakes and souffles were overturned at the restaurant he worked in, but no Scott. They came looking for him in the bar, under tables, in the head, no Scott. Vanished, ephemeral, a barrel load of mystery tapped into gone.

Down the...

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Friday Night: Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXVIII

(0) Comments | Posted November 22, 2015 | 2:54 AM

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There really is no fun on drugs, says Martin. I shrivel.

He installs solar panels and enjoys New Age ambient music. Early evening, he has failed to fire up the engine, again. Soon, he will be lying down in his bed listening...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXVII - The Body of the Bar

(0) Comments | Posted November 18, 2015 | 6:03 PM

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Tony Bennett left his heart in San Francisco. George left his liver.

His brother came in looking for it. George is in the hospital bright yellow, jaundiced. I look under the tables for a purple puss filled organ but to...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXVI - STOP!

(0) Comments | Posted November 7, 2015 | 7:28 PM

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John escapes from the rehab nuthouse. Vanishes down the lane, straight to the bar stool. They thought I'd be a prisoner, he says. I hand him a Tecate.

They're out there looking for him. Men in white coats with sniffers that can detect...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXIV - Nature Calls

(0) Comments | Posted November 4, 2015 | 6:20 PM

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The laws of space, the workings of nature.

A puddle forms on a bar stool. No hole in the roof, so it can't be rain. California is in a drought. It's not liquor or beer, neither soda nor tears. No chemical spill...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXV - Trumped

(0) Comments | Posted November 3, 2015 | 11:10 PM

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On the box, Trump looks like he is having a good time ranting and raving. Talking about The Deal.

He plans to replace Social Security, says Phil, lonesome, on a fix for politics. He's going to replace it with room service. Once...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXIII -- Straight Bends

(0) Comments | Posted October 31, 2015 | 5:55 PM

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Bobby, on meds, says he can't think straight.
Have you tried curved thinking, I say.
What's that?
Stand with your head at an angle when you think.
It doesn't work. He falls over drunk.
I'm unstable, he suggests.

...
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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXII - Going, Going, Gone...

(0) Comments | Posted October 28, 2015 | 12:00 AM

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Going, Going, Gone...

#83

Wisdom is my forte, says Alex, an idiot. He dispenses opinions.
Think of the poor mirror's feelings when you look in it, he says, to an ugly man. If you were to choose between your personality or...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXXI - Thinks

(0) Comments | Posted October 26, 2015 | 12:11 PM

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MAC thinks. He's in the smoking room around last call, hand on chin, thinking about how shit life is.

Does it help? I ask. Thinking, I haven't tried it.
No, he says. Don't bother. He pulls out a deck of...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXX - Scary Monsters and Super Creeps

(1) Comments | Posted October 22, 2015 | 12:00 AM

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Scary Monsters and Super Creeps...

Did I just see something slither to the shadow? Trip to the ice machine, all that is frozen in time like that cockroach, just kidding. I need to get my peripheral vision checked. I'm sure I just saw...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXIX - The Alones

(1) Comments | Posted October 18, 2015 | 11:29 PM

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The Alones...

She feels. She's sad. She tips double on her wine. She asks me if I want one. She asks me again if I want one. She wants to buy me one. She really wants me to drink one. She has her...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXVIII -- To the Nut House

(0) Comments | Posted October 15, 2015 | 10:42 PM

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John is going away. To a rehab nuthouse -- his words. One year in exile with a bunch of drunks. Ordered by psychiatrists. The doors are locked night and day. But he's figured out a way to get supplies delivered. His cell overlooks...

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Notes From a Dive Bar XXXVII -- Sticky Situations

(0) Comments | Posted October 12, 2015 | 11:10 PM

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A long trail follows curious Steven, long sheets of bad luck. He's been in many a sticky situation. He picked up a brown paper bag from the shade in the alley behind the dive.
What's in here? he inquired. A used...

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