Baby Name or Weapon of Mass Humiliation?

What's the worst thing you've ever let your older child do to the younger one? Ours are two years apart, so we let the older one stay up later, we let him have my old iPhone to use as a wireless device and yes, we sometimes give in to his requests because, at 8 years old, he's a more sophisticated negotiator than the 6-year-old. When he was 4, we let him name the fish someone gave us. Why? Because he came up with a name faster than his little brother did. (Calvin, as in Hobbes, in case you wondered.)

Yes, I believe in letting kids name things. Pets, stuffed animals... no problem. But another child? What was this mom smoking? In this week's episode of Coffee Shop Confessions, a mom let her toddler name the new baby, and he predictably chose a name he loved: SpongeBob.

In our family, baby names were settled as soon as we found out the child's gender -- both of our kids were named after family members and the discussions took all of five minutes. But if I were this mom and were somehow backed into a corner by my evil step-son, I'd happily make up a fake birth certificate. Maybe even legally name the baby Robert. Or if that were no good, provide the kid with a list of popular cartoon character names that would be less likely to provoke a playground riot. Phineas, Charlie, Lola, Diego, Max, Ruby, Peppa... the list goes on. We don't live in Sweden, where there's a legal precedent against cartoon character names, but as this mom confessed her story on CafeMom I'm surprised she hadn't seen The Rules - particularly #20, which recommends "no free brand endorsements."

 

 

 

Follow Alex McCord on Twitter: www.twitter.com/mccordalex

Comments

[Hugo Stiglitz1]

03:37 PM on 06/03/2012

Mr Carlin please...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oo8CrY_ZfFk

[MikeDu]

02:19 PM on 06/03/2012

I recall years ago being at a party where I overheard a couple teachers from a local magnet school mocking the names of their students. If you name your kid Semele or Leto one day they're going to run into someone who knows their Greek classics.

[ecotopian]

10:21 PM on 06/03/2012

I know the Greek classics. I really don't see anything wrong with Semele or Leto, mothers of gods both. Semele went up to Olympus with Dionysus and became a goddess. Leto was the goddess of motherhood. I don't see the problem with these names other than they are not what is considered traditional in the US right now. Do you have a problem with the name Maia, too? She's the mother of Hermes.

Now if the kid was named Medusa, there might be a problem :-)

[pecosdog]

10:29 AM on 06/03/2012

My brother in law picked his own catholic confirmation name as they do. He liked Ted Nugent. Thought he was going to be cool. He was beside himself when they called "Theodore" to come up to the altar.

[garystartswithg]

01:03 AM on 06/03/2012

You can change your kid's name, its not permanent -- my god child was named something most unfortunate, and then mom went with Henry later. He is now the coolest hipster alive.

[giagul]

07:38 AM on 06/02/2012

oh god, is she going to let the toddler drive and eat chicken nuggets every meal now.
she could have lied to the little boy and said his name is spongebob. how would he know? when the boy is older, he is going to think they are crazy

[Alex McCord]

11:10 PM on 06/03/2012

Exactly my reasoning behind photoshopping a fake birth certificate!

[afowler712]

07:29 AM on 06/02/2012

If my parents had let me have my way my younger sister Amber, would be named Penny after my three year old self's favorite cabbage patch doll.

[facethetruth1128]

03:47 AM on 06/02/2012

I don't think it's any crazier than giving an 8 year old " an iPhone to use as a wireless device".

[mommy2wes]

08:09 PM on 06/02/2012

Thank you!

[Alex McCord]

11:11 PM on 06/03/2012

For the record, it's an old one that doesn't have phone service, and is cheaper than buying him an iPad. We do what we can live with.

[digr4u2]

02:25 AM on 06/02/2012

A friend of mine let the older daughter name the new baby girl. She named her, Bella Ariel. Glad she was into Disney. I guess it could have been worse??

[Alex McCord]

11:12 PM on 06/03/2012

I went to school with a Misty Dawn. The mockery was rampant among boys, and unfrotunately, their fathers.

[Suzanna Schroeder]

12:07 AM on 06/02/2012

I let my son name his sister when he was 6. He named her Emily. It's not always a bad idea,

[afhsinger05]

11:57 PM on 06/01/2012

It could be sweet for the older sibling to name the new baby. It may let the older child feel they are more involved with the new baby, since alot of the focus will shift from the older sibling(s) to the newborn. As long as the name is not something outrageous, there is no harm. But the parent(s) should veto the name if it is outside of the box a little too much.

[Johanna DAmbruoso]

11:36 PM on 06/01/2012

Parents should choose their baby's name together, that is special.
Stop the spoiling...say "no"!

[ipleathe5thh]

11:19 PM on 06/01/2012

Kids should be included when it comes to making some descions for the new baby arrival....We let our oldest name one of our twin daughters and she did a good job and picked McKayla & we picked Arianna and then when we had daughter #4 we let the Twins help in picking a name but they didn't acutally give us names what we did was put a bunch of names we liked in a bowl and they each picked one name and what they picked was Brookelynn Oliva & it sounded just right....There are other ways to include your kids in the naming of the new baby with some grownup help and they feel special and get to feel proud that they helped Momma & Daddy pick their new sister's name. As cute as this story is about the Spongebob name that's giving a little too much power to the kiddies. But it's a good idea to include them....It's what our doctor told us when we were expecting the Twins we let our now 8 year old help picked the name with some help from mommy & daddy and it made her so happy because she was able to help and she loves helping with her younger sisters when it comes to changing diapers to feeding and everything....It makes em think wow! this is cool and they'll follow my example and show it off in school and their friends.

[zeroagenow]

09:49 PM on 06/01/2012

spongebob makes as much sense as track,trig, stick ot any other name these doper republicans come up with for their kids

[see-ellen2001]

10:19 AM on 06/02/2012

Zeroagenow: that made me laugh. Couldn't help but think if they were twins,would the names be track and field, trig and anometry, and stick and stone.

[thegrrrr8est]

12:33 PM on 06/03/2012

Oh, yeah. Those names are really stupid. Unlike these, by famous Democrats:
Duncan Zowie Heywood Jones
Kal-el
Suri
Fifi Trixibelle
Heavanely Hiraani Tiger
Moxie Crime Fighter

Zero, every fricking thing doesn't have to be about politics.

[Glenda Barker]

09:39 PM on 06/01/2012

I let my older pick the middle name of his little brother.. he did a great job. My son thinks it's funny he's named after the karate kid.. Daniel

[redhed67]

08:06 PM on 06/01/2012

One of my older brothers picked my middle name when I was born. Luckily, it's a nice, normal name!! LOL It's ok to allow children some input in naming their siblings as long as you also use common sense.

[ipleathe5thh]

11:19 PM on 06/01/2012

It wasn't Redhead or Ginger was it?

I'm just kidding!

[Catalina hime]

11:55 PM on 06/01/2012

Why aren't you a politician? You make so much more sense than many of the politicians I heard.