Love: The Ultimate And Highest Goal

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, this is probably as good a time as ever to discuss the relationship between "love" and the "search for meaning." In this regard, Viktor Frankl's holistic view on the importance of our intuitive capacity for love offers great insight into how meaning in everyday life--and even at work--reveals itself.

"Love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire....The salvation of man is through love and in love. I understood how a man who has nothing left in this world still may know bliss, be it only for a brief moment, in the contemplation of his beloved."

Dr. Frankl, wrote these words in his classic bestseller, Man's Search for Meaning, a book that was first published in German in 1946 under the title, "Ein Psycholog erlebt das Konzentrationslager" (From Death-Camp to Existentialism). For good reason, Man's Search for Meaning remains one of the most important books of modern times (the Library of Congress named it one of the ten most influential books in America). Indeed, Dr. Frankl's personal story of finding a reason to live in the most horrendous of circumstances--Nazi concentration camps--has inspired millions of people around the world. To be sure, I am both honored and humbled to have had him as a mentor.

Alex Pattakos with Viktor Frankl at his home, Vienna, Austria, August 1996

It is against this personal backdrop that Frankl's quote about love must be considered. And considered very seriously. You see, although Viktor Frankl was blessed with surviving his horrific ordeal in four different Nazi death camps, including Auschwitz, his mother, father, wife, and brother were not so fortunate. And even though he had been stripped of everything, down--literally--to the bare bones of his humanity, Frankl experienced moments of bliss, especially when he thought of his beloved--his wife, his parents, his brother, and others who were dear to him. In no uncertain terms, he learned unequivocally that love was his salvation and that, among all of the values that offered him a source of personal meaning, it was love that proved to be the "ultimate and highest goal to which he could aspire."

I would like all of us to reflect seriously upon the above passage from Man's Search for Meaning, along with Dr. Frankl's personal, love-affirming experience--today, tomorrow, and forever. What do you think about it? How does it make you feel? How and in what ways are you bringing and weaving love into your life? Into your work?

Into your "work?!" Yes, that is what I said. Even though we don't normally associate this particular "L" word with work or the workplace, it does have an important and meaningful role to play. I'm not talking about romantic love, even though we all know that it sometimes finds its way into the work setting. I'm talking about love in the sense of caring about another person's "highest good." And this includes those with whom we may work, such as co-workers, colleagues, associates, customers, vendors, partners, students, patients, and so on. This notion of work and the workplace is not as far-fetched as one might initially think. For instance, in my book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts, I write about a company, Skaltek, a major equipment manufacturer based in Stockholm, Sweden, where the task of building a meaningful workplace is taken very seriously. Listen to the words of Őystein Skalleberg, the founder of Skaltek, as he describes his philosophy about people and work:

"Every human being is a Leonardo da Vinci. The only problem is that he doesn't know it. His parents didn't know it, and they didn't treat him like a Leonardo. Therefore he didn't become like a Leonardo. That's my basic theory."

Because Skalleberg seeks to practice what he preaches, there are many attributes of the working environment at Skaltek that would be considered "radical" by even some of the most innovative companies/organizations in the world today. One is an annual employment appraisal process that involves the use of randomly selected performance review teams. According to Skalleberg, since no one knows who will be conducting their performance review each year, "Everybody smiles in all directions!" Skalleberg also has a revolutionary formula for building a company culture in the postmodern era:

Confidence is the start of it,
Joy is a part of it,
Love is the heart of it.

Now, doesn't Skaltek sound like a company with a meaning-focused philosophy about bringing love to work?

And, once again, with Valentine's Day just around the corner, why not make now the time to (re)affirm too that "love is the ultimate and highest goal" to which we all can aspire?!

***

You can find out more about Dr. Alex Pattakos, author of the international bestselling book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts, in his HuffPost Bio and at http://www.prisonersofourthoughts.com. See also his "Dr. Meaning" Channel on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/DrMeaning. You can contact Alex at: [e-mail].

Comments

[Pearlswan]

Its not always possible to love the work you do or to work in a loving and nurturing environment. That is unfortunate. However, it is always possible to bring the light of love to whatever you do. For instance, who could love cleaning toilets for a living? Its a dirty job that offers little to love. But, if you think about the job in the context of the people it serves, then love will manifest itself. If you believe that a job well done will keep the workers who use the facility healthy (less germs) so they can keep earning money to provide their families with a decent quality of life, then you have just brought love to the workplace. People recognize a job well done with gratitude. Gratitude is the basis of love. So that love flows on to the next person, and the next, ad infinitum. That's how it works.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

"It is always possible to bring the light of love to whatever you do." Very nicely said! As I write in my book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts, "When we meet our work with enthusiasm, appreciation, generosity, and integrity, we meet it with meaning...­.We breathe, therefore we are--spiritual. Life is, therefore it is--meaningful. We do, therefore we work." I now must add "gratitude­." Thank you for your comment!

[Eli Davidson - Huffpost Blogger]

Victor Frankl is one of the most heroic examples of living love beyond one's circumstances.

The most horrific of circumstances that make our current challenges look pale in comparison.

"And even though he had been stripped of everything, down--literally--to the bare bones of his humanity, Frankl experienced moments of bliss, especially when he thought of his beloved--his wife, his parents, his brother, and others who were dear to him. In no uncertain terms, he learned unequivocally that love was his salvation and that, among all of the values that offered him a source of personal meaning, it was love that proved to be the "ultimate and highest goal to which he could aspire." THANK YOU!

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thanks, Eli, for sharing your comment! It looks like we are traveling similar (and meaningful) paths! Against the backdrop of my post, I wish you a very Happy Valentine's Day! Alex

[Norge]

Yes it is fine to bring love to the work place though those who do need to leave their organs at another place they call home.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

As I said in my post, I wasn't talking about "romantic" love, nor was I referring to the kind of human encounters that is implied in your comment! This said, thanks for sharing!

[SharonB]

The traits that make one a person of dignity:

love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Google them and see where they come from.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Ah, "Google"; where would we be without it?!

[Mari X]

Love & Work. Yes, these two fundamental human imperatives have enormous power when joined together in a meaningful "job".

I, particularly, prefer to work in collaborations with other creative people. The mix of ideas and the common LOVE for what we're doing- and why we're doing it- produces some very satisfying results.
Sadly, our current American business culture, one that separates, divides and fosters only competition in the "workplace" ( that can be in one's own HOME now, too) has made a bunch of scared, insecure workers rather than the confident, caring types who could temper the emotional climate, so to speak.

DaVincis, all. Perhaps. I will agree that our environments have a lot to do with shaping the people we are. We all need to practice the giving and receiving of love in a continuum of consciousness as much as we need to work at something bigger than our separate selves, alone. Thank you for this thoughtful article.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thank YOU for your thoughtful comment! The practice of giving and receiving love, at work and in our personal lives, is a manifestation of "spirit." Importantly, spirit does not recognize barriers, divisions, or fragmentation between people and other living entities. Spirit, in other words, is boundary-less. Hence, bringing the "L" word (Love) into work and the workplace is analogous to bringing the "S" word (Spirit) to work and the workplace.

[DiogenesOfAlaska]

Skalleberg's view strikes me as similar to what Joseph Beuys taught - another proof that Beuys really was an entrepreneur first and foremost: one who knows what 'intrinsic motivation' is.

And you can't begin to imagine how I love the sound of puff that befalls the hollow threatening 'incentive' each time I put the two next to each other.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thank you for sharing and for underscoring the importance of "intrinsic motivation" in the workplace, etc.. The more that we are able to factor in the value of "intrinsic" motivation of human beings, rather than focusing solely on "extrinsic" motivational factors, I believe that work and the workplace will become more "meaningful" in all respects.

[dougreeler]

I was struck by the word "kindness" - its a groundd word... we express love through kindness, loving kindness. One of the most humanly functional schools in Cape Town has kindness as its core value and staff and learners are encourage to find ways to express kindness.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

"Kindness" as a core value at work?! What a powerful and meaningful concept. Thanks for sharing. I'm not sure if you are from Cape Town, but Viktor Frankl was very active in South Africa and there is a "Viktor Frankl Foundation of South Africa" that seeks to advance his message.

[timezone]

I believe going into the world with a loving heart ,no matter where or what the situation, is crucial for a fair, just and happy world. I believe the biggest problem love and kindness face in the workforce is that many see the workplace as being about strength, competition, and "eating what you kill". It's also about egos in a very big way. To show kindness and fairness can be seen as weak, and sometime someone feels to hold onto one's status as a boss or the boss, they must appear strong, possibly even a bit menacing. Everyone wants to take the credit, and teamwork or being truly happy for a co-worker's success, isn't the norm. Until the corporate business structure changes and endorses fairness and caring, and looks at customer service even more than pure, immediate profit, I think love and kindness have their work cut out for them.

[GrainOSand]

I concur with your assessment.

We will be forced to change when we finally realize the folly of our approach and the long-term damage of short-term and short-sighted tendencies of selfish behavior that are too much weighted on lust of things and perverted love of self (vanity, greed, cruelty, feelings of inadequacy producing competitive drive, etc...)

[timezone]

Thanks for your comment, Grain. Unfortunately the short-term and short-sighted tendencies you speak of haven't seemed to change in much of the high-level corporate world yet, even though those behaviors have gotten the world economy where it is today. As long as some people can still get theirs, they don't seem to care much about the rest of us. I guess they have to tumble to the bottom to realize the folly of their approach..­..I hope it isn't too long of a wait.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thanks, "grainofsand," for helping to keep our collective focus on the will to meaning, rather than either the will to power or pleasure!

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thank you for your insightful comment. Although I agree that "love and kindness have their work cut out for them," I'm optimistic that progress "is" being made! The creative destruction that we are witnessing around us at this very moment is also a catalyst for meaningful change. Let's not either give up hope or become complacent. The alternative is not acceptable! Thanks again.

[GrainOSand]

Wow!

First I have got to get to Sweden and put in an application at Skaltek. (-:

Mr. Pattakos, thank you very much for saying it loud and making it plain. Love is misunderstood. It is the highest. At a time of great struggle and uncertainty in life I am flying high and unencumbered by the weight of fret because I still love, because I can still think outside the box of selfishness to be concerned about another to the degree I am moved to soar. At the time of the greatest injury I have ever sustained to my heart (years ago), it was love that sustained me.

In Mr. Frankl's book there is much to remember or to heed. What always stuck with me was when he described those who lost hope and how once that is lost it is a difficult road back to anything resembling life. I lost hope, but I never lost love. I lost faith in the American system, but I never stopped loving the people of America. I lost hope and faith in myself, but it was apparent throughout that I could not deny that I was and am worthy of love. What makes me good at anything I do is the amount of love I have for the task. Love caused me to pull eighty hour weeks on a salary that paid no overtime.

Continued.­..

[GrainOSand]

II
Love caused me to utilize free time to bone-up on the latest advances in my field with a passion that fostered excellence. Love got me out of the bed in the morning, not the paycheck. When love left my profession I left with it.

Unconditional love is an indescribable power. I cannot deny the joy of such a heart. It does not shield you from pain it puts pain in perspective. It does not shield you from setback it picks you up off the ground when you fall. Love is the real progressive agenda and the task of the enlightened politician is to figure out how to express that in policy. I truly love every individual alive, dead, or to be born. I love their spirit, their potential, and their unique gift of precious life. My idea of love says that if there is anything I can do to further the advance of another, it is my duty to act. I have no self-righteous, holier-than-thou concept at work in my thought process. All of my proclamations are made with the humility of one who knows his own feeble nature. I still say that love is key, love is truth, love is light, and love is sustainable. It is the cure-all for all that ails us. The pond awaits and horses can be led to the pond of love. Taking a drink remains individual choice. Oh how refreshing the pure water of love.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Let me also say, "Wow!" What an enlightened soul! Keep spreading the light! Not too many years ago, I was facilitating a dialogue session in Europe with participants from some 60 countries, many of whom were living in places of civil unrest. I remember one of the participants, who was not into "metaphysics," remark that light naturally seeks to spread itself, i..e, expand, across a dark room. In other words, a little "light" goes a long way!

[Anne Naylor - Huffpost Blogger]

Alex,

Wonderful post, thank you.

The workplace, where a person spends a good part of their living day, is absolutely the place to cultivate love - in the forms of respect, integrity, kindness, consideration, caring - well the list goes on.

A world in which there is more love will make for better health, greater productivity - it could even be the world we are now evolving into. I hope! I am sure that the intention to love more clearly and deeply is what gives life its greatest meaning.

I appreciate your opening this discussion.

With love and blessings,
Anne

[GrainOSand]

Love is the essential element. It is fundamental to great societies, corporations, neighborhoods, families, and individuals, in my humble opinion. It is missing and at the same time prevalent in this society. May we stack the odds in the favor of love prevailing over hate. We have the framework now let us build the society that exemplifies love.

With love and blessings indeed...

...with love and the blessings thereof, we can address all human needs.

Life is hard enough without hate.

Let us do all we can to find a better way to relate to one another, to be a family of loving and kind, sisters and brothers.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Amen!

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Thank you, Anne, for your very kind words. Indeed, this is a discussion that needs to be opened and continued until we create the kind of meaningful workplaces that you describe, as well as create a better world for everyone.

[wm1066]

When I was a senior in high school in the late sixties we had to read this book, its one of the only books I remember reading in school. It was a profound book that inspired lots of debate in class.
I know think that to be "saved" is not who you pick as your god, whether its Christian, Muslim, Jew ,Hindu, Buhdist or what ever. Its if you give more in life than take. I think anyone that gives love will get to heaven no matter what god they follow, even if they don't believe in god. Its the ones that take (like Madoff) and are parasites to society that don't get to the promised land.

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

I'm so glad to hear that you not only remember reading Man's Search for Meaning but were inspired by it in high school. And, of course, thank you for sharing your perspective!

[Michele Rosenthal]

Yikes! Alex, the last word of my comment got sacked: 'know'. If you remove the word 'our' from the first paragraph ("While it's true we find meaning in our love for others') you should be able to add the final word to the last sentence. Sorry for this inconvenience. I don't know why the application posted without a warning.

Have a love(ly) day!

[Michele Rosenthal]

I'm so glad you included work on your list of ways in which we can seek meaning through love. I would add: Love of what we do! While it's true we find meaning in our love for others, the foundation for how well we love others begins with how well we love ourselves -- which can be incredibly buoyed by how we feel about the contribution we're making to the world. Pursuing a career that we love (and that we love ourselves for) is a great way to position ourselves for love and meaning to enter all aspects of our lives.

I'm a trauma survivor recently healed from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). A large part of my healing came from learning to love the person I'd become due to trauma. Not mourning who I was or could have been if fate hadn't intervened, but learning to appreciate and celebrate the evolution from Before to After to Now - and bringing into my professional life that love for myself and others on a similar path.

We cannot find meaning in suffering, but we can make meaning come out of it if we take the love we develop for our traumatized and healed selves and use it for good. It's exactly this inspiration that led me to found a PTSD advocacy organization.

Imagine how much good we could do if everyone sought to approach the world through an avenue that makes us love who we are, what we do and who we

[Alex Pattakos - Huffpost Blogger]

Hi Michele, thank you for much for your excellent and insightful comments. To paraphrase Viktor Frankl, "You don't have to suffer to learn. But, if you don't learn from suffering, over which you have no control, then your life becomes truly meaningless. The way in which a person accepts her/his fate--those things beyond one's control--can add a deeper meaning to her/his life. S/he controls how s/he responds." In the final analysis, love, as the highest and ultimate goal (and meaningful value), is the most powerful response available to us.