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Hollywood Republicans Respond to Satirical "Don't Vote" PSA with Counter-PSA

11/02/2008 05:12 am 05:12:02 | Updated May 25, 2011

A short film script, in response to this message from the Hollywood liberal elite.

FADE IN:

INT. LUXURIOUS MANSION - DAY
KELSEY GRAMMER speaks into CAMERA.

KELSEY GRAMMER
No, but seriously: don't vote. Unless you
make over $250,000 a year.

Grammer eats a piece of sushi off a BEAUTIFUL NAKED WOMAN in his Beverly Hills mansion. She may or may not be dead.

EXT. IN FRONT OF "SEINFELD" DINER - DAY

JOHN O'HURLEY (a.k.a. Elaine's boss J. Peterman) stands in front of the famous Seinfeld diner.

JOHN O'HURLEY
I know the liberals were being ironic, but
this is serious. Plus shorter and less boring.
Please don't vote, unless you don't believe in
time tables.

He NUDGES a legless VETERAN on one of those rolling dolly things down the street. The Veteran CRASHES into a garbage can.

INT. FAMILY PLANNING CLINIC - DAY

A NURSE hands a BOYFRIEND and GIRLFRIEND information on having safe sex.

NURSE
Here you are...

CHUCK NORRIS stands beside her.

CHUCK NORRIS
So don't vote, unless you don't believe in
family planning.

He ROUNDHOUSE KICKS her in the face, sending her through the window.

CHUCK NORRIS
Because there's too much at stake not
to NOT vote.
(off CAMERA)
Wait, did I say that right?

FADE OUT: