iOS app Android app

Allison Tate
Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and a mom to four. She is a graduate of Princeton University and uses her degree in English to try to talk her kids into cooperating on a daily basis. Her 2012 HuffPost essay "The Mom Stays in the Picture" led to multiple media appearances and was selected as a BlogHer Voices of the Year selection in 2013. You can find her on Facebook and on Twitter as well as her personal blog. Her writing has also appeared in Brain, Child Magazine and in two anthologies, The HerStories Project and This Is Childhood.

Entries by Allison Tate

Just Tell Them Your Mom Tried

(3) Comments | Posted January 6, 2016 | 10:45 PM

Every morning before school, I beg. I plead. I implore.

Then, every morning, I kiss my 8-year-old's head as he heads off to third grade rocking some concoction of neon -- but woefully mismatched -- athletic wear, two different socks often of two very different heights, half-brushed bedhead hair, and...

Read Post

What A Fingernail Taught Me About Being The ‘Perfect' Mom

(16) Comments | Posted August 24, 2015 | 12:00 AM

When my husband and I brought our first baby boy home from the hospital exactly 13 years ago, everything was perfect: the nursery color (a light yellow I had made my husband re-paint after his initial choice turned out to be more highlighter than moonlight), the crib bedding that we...

Read Post

The Moment I Tell New Moms to Hang On For

(9) Comments | Posted May 14, 2015 | 5:27 PM

I'm not supposed to say it out loud, I think, but I didn't fall in love with my baby the first moment I saw him.

My labor was hard. My body was wrecked. When he came out, slightly indigo from having a cord wrapped around his neck three times and...

Read Post

Help Me Find the Heroes Our Kids Can Believe In

(7) Comments | Posted December 18, 2014 | 3:16 PM

As I have aged, one of the hardest things I have found about being counted amongst the "grown-ups" has been having the curtain pulled all the way back, leaving me privy to the true evil in the world. No matter how old or jaded I am, I am never prepared...

Read Post

35 Reasons Why Summer Needs to Be Over Now

(6) Comments | Posted August 12, 2014 | 11:48 AM

1. Wet bathing suits.

2. Wet towels.

3. We find a reason for ice cream every day.


4. My shorts are getting tight (see number 3).

5. My toddler has sunscreen in her eyebrows -- and I didn't put sunscreen on her today.


Read Post

10 Ways Twitter Is Like Parenting a Toddler

(0) Comments | Posted May 16, 2014 | 1:51 PM

Is it possible to sleep train Twitter? Would you have to go in every ten minutes or so to settle it back down? Or could you -- if you were exhausted, say, really fried -- put it in a dark room, safely contained, close the door, and leave it to...

Read Post

The Parenting 'Rules' My Mom Taught Me to Break

(4) Comments | Posted May 6, 2014 | 11:35 AM

In many ways, my childhood was completely conventional: my parents raised me and my younger brother in a two-story house in suburbia and sent me to public schools. My mom played team tennis and was president of the PTA; my dad was an attorney and came home every night from...

Read Post

Why Our 'Imperfect' Moments Are Perfect to Our Children

(4) Comments | Posted April 17, 2014 | 5:00 PM

One day last summer my friend Cynthia Graham, a professional photographer, offered to take pictures of me with my children on vacation in North Carolina to help me in my effort to "stay in the picture."

The morning we arranged to take the pictures, my parents were in...

Read Post

10 Movies This Child of the '80s Wants Her Kids to Learn From

(88) Comments | Posted April 7, 2014 | 11:29 AM

Somehow, I am 39. I am 39, even though I still feel like I am maybe 17 and I still look around for the real "grown-ups." As I stare down 40 and gear up for another phase of life, I find myself going back to the things that...

Read Post

The Day Someone Threw Me a Rope

(49) Comments | Posted February 18, 2014 | 7:59 AM

I can still remember where I sat on the floor in the room, the Southern California light pouring in that way it does, diagonally through the plate glass windows and bending through the blinds. There were about twelve of us sitting in a circle, leaning back against folding cushions, our...

Read Post

The Rocks in His Pockets

(3) Comments | Posted January 22, 2014 | 2:36 PM

They started appearing about a month or two ago by the handful. Every day, after school, my youngest son would show me when he hopped into the minivan and dropped his backpack into the backseat. "Mom, you will never guess what I found today!"

They are all alike, the...

Read Post

There Is No Gentle Death for a Mother

(1) Comments | Posted January 14, 2014 | 10:54 AM

On Sunday night, as I lay in a bed in a darkened room with my 6-year-old son's arms twisted around mine, newly slack with sleep, I clicked the Twitter app on my phone. I wasn't quite sure my son was far enough into his dreams to leave him, but I...

Read Post

This Is (My) 39

(7) Comments | Posted January 3, 2014 | 11:22 AM

I am feeling my age. Age is a loaded word and concept, but in my case, what I mean is that I feel this year of 39 completely: this is not just another year in the life. When I was younger, the milestone birthdays seemed to be 13, 16, 18...

Read Post

Sometimes Good Parents Miss the Class Party

(13) Comments | Posted November 12, 2013 | 12:06 PM

The day after Halloween is never an easy day for anyone associated with children. I do not understand why schools don't just give up the (Halloween) ghost and make the day after Halloween a teacher work day. Should we really subject teachers to classrooms full of exhausted children with sugar...

Read Post

Un an après, Maman reste toujours sur la photo

(0) Comments | Posted October 8, 2013 | 10:05 AM

Il y a un an tout juste, j'avais réussi à m'échapper pour déjeuner au restaurant avec mon mari, quand mon téléphone a bipé: j'ai vu alors que Le Huffington Post avait publié un texte que j'avais écrit, intitulé "Maman, reste sur la photo!". La semaine qui a suivi...

Read Post

Lessons Learned from a Year of Staying in the Picture

(15) Comments | Posted October 6, 2013 | 12:56 PM

It was a year ago this week that I was sitting at a restaurant booth with my husband, sneaking in a lunch together, when my phone pinged and I saw that the Huffington Post had published a piece I wrote called "The Mom Stays in the Picture." The...

Read Post


(33) Comments | Posted September 24, 2013 | 12:12 PM

Years ago, when I was still trying to decide whether or not to add a third child to our family (never mind a fourth), I attended the wedding of two dear friends in Chicago. The bride was the baby of her large family, the groom the middle of three brothers....

Read Post

Growing Pains

(15) Comments | Posted September 9, 2013 | 3:45 PM

They grow up so fast, says everyone. He's so big, they marvel. Look how grown up he is now. And my heart hurts.

My oldest son, my first baby, started middle school today. It was not long ago -- not in my (admittedly addled) mind, at least -- that...

Read Post

The Best of Mothers

(55) Comments | Posted August 19, 2013 | 5:23 PM

"Farewell, best of wives, best of mothers."

The words on my Facebook page stopped me in my tracks. They formed my college friend's status update -- solemn, careful words, the likes of which rarely grace my newsfeed. Below, he posted his mother's memorial page, explaining that she had recently succumbed...

Read Post

The Third Metric: It's All About the Halloween Parades

(6) Comments | Posted June 13, 2013 | 1:59 PM

Last month, my third child graduated from kindergarten. This means that, among other things, I am now a three-time veteran of the Kindergarten Halloween Parade. Three times, I have hurried to the elementary school to watch from the sidewalk as a tiny boy I love marched beside his classmates --...

Read Post