Manhattan is filled with interesting characters, and when you leave your apartment you never know what you might experience, which emotion may surface from our broad spectrum. I decided to capture these moments here.
*****
Elle is a rare find. I met her 21 years ago after uprooting from my mother's house in Southern Virginia to live with my father in his Midwestern town with one blinking light. Of the 52 students in my new graduating class, Elle was one of the few that stood out. She was genuine, yet sarcastic, fun and real.
We did lose touch after high school but one good thing about Facebook is that you find people, and they find you. Ironically, Elle had moved to the East Village one year after I'd relocated to Manhattan. But it didn't surprise me much, because amazing people seeking amazing opportunity, move to New York City.
Elle and I were back in touch and meeting for brunch at Cafe Orlin on a Sunday. We hadn't seen each other in 20 years, but we picked back up and spent the entire day together. There's something uniquely special about being around someone who has known you for so long.
*****
Two years later, our rekindled friendship continued. This particular afternoon we were meeting for coffee in the Village.
*****
"Hey!" she said.
"Hi! So you were at the doctor? Just a regular checkup or is anything going on?"
"You know my toe fungus? Which is how I met Vlad, which is how I met Victor?"
"I remember," I said.
"It's back. So I went to a podiatrist. I asked Victor if I could just go see Vlad and he said 'No! He'll chop off your toe! He's still bitter I stole you.' So I went to this other doctor. He was great. What's happening with you?" she asked.
I grinned.
"I didn't get much sleep last night...because... I had sex!"
"So did I, but I'm not nearly as excited about it as you are."
"Well it was the first time with this guy. And... I like him. Crap."
"Is it serious?"
"No!"
"All you've been wanting is a relationship and you finally meet someone you like and now you don't want it?"
"I do. I don't know. It's scary. We'll see. Get this. He's black. And he's 50!"
"So what. No judgment here. Age is not important."
"I'm feigning for a 50 year-old black man. This is actually happening."
We laughed.
*****
"So how are you and Victor?" I asked.
"We're good. You should have heard our conversation this morning. I'm blow-drying my hair and he goes, 'Elle. We have to talk. When are you going to give me a baby?'"
"Oh my goodness."
"Right? He said, 'You're 36. If we start trying in a year, you'll be 38 before you get pregnant and then 39 before you have the baby. And if we wait any longer, you'll be in your 40s!'
"Thank you for analyzing my life in terms of my age. But right now I'm 36 and I don't feel 36. I don't even know what I want to do yet. I can't have some little accessories tagging along."
"Accessories? Ha! I can't imagine it either," I said. "I can't believe we're 36. Sometimes I catch myself saying I'm 30. And then I'm like, 'No, what? I'm 32. Wait, no, I'm 36!' Time goes so fast it doesn't seem real."
"I know." she said.
"So yesterday I'm at the Connecticut Muffin," said Elle, "and I'm sitting there with my computer planning to drink tea and write and this old man starts talking to me. He sees I have the real estate section.
"'So you planning on buying some property?' he said.
"I have the paper to save my table actually,' I said.
"He continued. 'Because I can tell you anything you want to know about this neighborhood,' which he proceeded to do.
"He went on for 15 minutes and I said to myself, 'God, this man obviously struck up a conversation with me for a reason, so can you just have him spill it already?
"I kid you not, right then he goes, 'Are you married?' I said no. 'Do you have kids?' 'No.' 'Do you want to get married and have kids?' he said. 'I don't know,' I said.
"'Well, listen. Get married and have kids. When I was younger I dated a lot and women were lined up for me.'
"Sure they were,' I said."
"You said that?" I asked.
"Yeah! And he goes, 'now the only people who come check on me are the people I pay. When you have kids and grandkids they come over and do things for you because they have to. So have kids!'"
"Wow. That's crazy how as soon as you said 'show me the reason this man is talking to me,' he came out with it."
"I know!"
"So do you want to marry Victor?" I asked.
"No."
"I kind of thought you'd come around at some point. He's crazy about you."
"I know. We're going to Paris next month."
"Wow!"
"Yeah, he wants to go so we're going. But, I mean, his dreams stop here." She holds her hand up a foot out from her body. "And mine keep going."
"I know," I said. "I hear you."
*****
"So this might sound a little wacky," Elle said. "but I've been researching a lot and I came across this stuff about the afterlife, like this medium, Danielle MacKinnon."
"Yeah?"
"It's helping me to relax about things," Elle said.
"I like that one thing we talked about," I said, "about floating 'downstream' instead of fighting upstream against what flows naturally. I applied it yesterday. Listen to this." I started laughing.
"What?"
"You don't want to hear this. Too much information, but you will appreciate it."
"What?"
I laughed again.
"So I've been seeing the guy for a few weeks. I really like him and was going to wait to sleep with him. Six months. But he's so smooth and sexy and I was going crazy and felt the need to sleep with a black man. So I was brainstorming options as I'm walking around the city yesterday."
"Oh my God, you're a mess."
"And I thought of Ulysses."
"Ulysses?" she said.
"Remember that picture I had in my phone for the longest time? I showed it to you and you said I should delete it immediately."
"Oh! Your old neighbor, that sent you the 'unsolicited' pic?"
"Yes! So we run in the same circles a little. And now he has a girlfriend so I feel more comfortable like he's not going to hit on me. I started thinking he might be an option. I could run into him, one thing would lead to another. He could cheat on his girlfriend just once, I could get my fix and we could just stay friends. This actually went through my head.
"And then I said, let's not scramble and try to make something happen. Chill out and float 'downstream.' Later that day my guy asked me out. We had a great time. I was not going to let him into my apartment, because I knew what would happen. I let him in. And it was phenomenal. Just by floating downstream. I sat back and smiled, proud of myself.
Elle laughed, averting eye contact. Too much sex talk.
*****
"Tell me about this afterlife stuff," I said.
"So I'm Catholic, right? I've been questioning religion lately. Think about it. The bible was written thousands of years ago. People used to think the Earth was flat. I think religion should evolve as we evolve.
"This is pretty out there," Elle continued. "I've been reading about the different worlds our spirits live through. When we die our spirits go on to the next world, traveling in groups. You know when you feel you've known someone forever and you've only just met? Or there's a connection with someone you're watching on television you've never met? You knew their soul in another life."
"I could see that. I feel connected to Woody Allen."
"Are you being sarcastic?" Elle smiled. "I'm sensing sarcasm."
"I'm totally being serious!"
"Like de ja vu. We experienced that moment or feeling in another life."
"I just got chills," I said.
"It's made me worry less about things. Victor is like, 'What is up with you? You've turned to mush. You used to be this high-powered executive in a suit who made things happen. Now you're mush.'
"That wasn't me, I told him. You thought that was me. 18-hour workdays, crying myself to sleep, getting screamed at by my CEO. You have to go after what you want in life, and work to keep it, but life is not supposed to be hard. People think it has to be a struggle when life is supposed to be fun."
"I agree."
"We live all these lives and our souls evolve with time. You're super sexual," said Elle. "You were probably a guy in a past life."
"I think I was a very well-endowed black guy."
"I think I was an old man in a past life," she said.
We laughed.
She continued, "Like maybe Henry Ford invented something much smaller in a past life, and as time evolved and he was born into this more advanced world, he created the assembly line and then the Model T."
"Yeah, maybe he was a caveman who invented the wheel," I said.
"Sometimes I look at my parents and wonder if I've lived more lives than they have," Elle said. "My dad I get so much knowledge from, but I feel like I'm trying to teach my mother things."
"I feel the same way about my mother," I said.
"I'll just look at her sometimes and think, 'Is this right?'" said Elle.