11/08/2010 05:15 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Bush Publishes Memoir, I Can Has Prezidensy

The Borowitz Report has obtained an advance copy of former President George W. Bush's memoir, entitled I Can Has Prezidensy. Here are some highlights:

  • The book contains a "Where's Waldo?" foldout section with WMDs.
  • Bush says the biggest disappointment of his eight years in office was learning there was no Santa Claus
  • The book's appendix includes a series of connect-the-dot drawings Bush was unable to complete
  • Bush on the unfinished business of his Presidency: "I never did learn how that neat story about the goat ended."
  • Bush's memoir is a quick read, since 95% of it has been redacted by Dick Cheney
  • Six months after the book's publication there will be an English-language version

In other news, former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin blasted President Obama for meeting with Indians: "This isn't Thanksgiving." Continue reading here.

The Los Angeles Times says Andy Borowitz has "one of the funniest Twitter feeds around." Follow Andy on Twitter here.