NBC Launches To Catch a Senator

Dateline, the NBC newsmagazine which has scored big ratings for its To Catch a Predator investigations, announced today that it would introduce a new investigative series this fall, entitled To Catch a Senator.

At a press conference in New York, NBC News president Steve Capus said that To Catch a Senator would focus the Dateline investigation team's energies on "the number one menace in America today: pervy Republican senators."

While he indicated that plans for the program are still being developed, Mr. Capus said that To Catch a Senator would use an airport bathroom as the nerve center for its sting operation.

Specifically, he said that the program would deploy Predator host Chris Hansen as a decoy to lure depraved senators into lewd contact.

"Chris will be waiting in one of the bathroom stalls, and when the senator taps on the wall, Chris will kind of pop out of the stall and start grilling him," Mr. Capus said. "We'll nail that bastard faster than he can say 'I'm not gay.'"

But even as NBC trumpeted its latest Dateline spin-off, industry insiders wondered whether there would be an adequate supply of sex-crazed senators to keep the program going for more than a few episodes.

For his part, Mr. Capus brushed off such concerns, telling reporters, "As long as there are Republican senators out there who oppose gay marriage, there will always be plenty of pervs."

Elsewhere, President Bush praised Pakistan's General Pervez Musharraf for agreeing to stand for election, saying, "If free and fair elections work in Pakistan, we may eventually try them here."

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

Comments

[JimHinCO]

Out of curiosity, why not just post a uniformed cop in the bathroom? That would deter men from having sex in the restroom.

Or post a sign: "This bathroom is patrolled by undercover policeman."

Or this: "Please don't have sex in here!" :)

[seawolf77]

Watching Republicans contest for who can provide the lewdest and most disgusting conduct is truly hilarious. But getting it on film : priceless.

[hiprogloho]

If there's a joke in all this, it's on he who denies his identity, not sexual orientation itself. Those who might label vice stings that catch pervert politicos as gay bashing miss the point.

Our greatest President, Abe Lincoln, was said to be gay or bi. The issue here is not gayness. That's a matter of God given biological genetics.

Rather the beef is against elected officials who are supposed to be held to higher social standards committing lewd acts in public.

These same shady figureheads who lie and live a double life all too often betray the public trust and vote for party line legislation of a PC agenda that hurts their fellow man.

Gay or straight, DC is turning into a modern day Sodom & Gomorrah. If the hedonism can be tied to pages, madams and public restrooms, then it must be widely prevalent everywhere Congressmen do the government's dirty work.

Pun intended.

[drblack]

With all the un-Constitutional entrapment that cops indulge in to catch guys trying to have sex with hookers or buy a little weed I would LOVE to see those entrapment techniques used on Federal politicians.
In India a journalist does that with great effect.

[ExposingCommunists]

If only NBC and the MSM would only spend time, with the help of their Party, "To Catch a Terrorist" INSTEAD OF CHEERING FOR THEM!

And then they complain about Faux's FAIR AND BALANCED?

[anastasiabeaverhousen]

A great idea. The first episode could compare the gop response to David Vitter and the DC Madamn (no calls to resign on that one) with the hipocracy of the faux outrage over Craig.

Because one involves.....gasp.....homosexual sex and the other doesn't????

Or, more likely because Louisiana has a Democratic Governor who would probably replace Vitter with a Democrat.

Could that be the difference?????? You bet your tapping shoes.

[Zyzzygowski]

Nope. The difference is Sen 'Wide Stance' from the great state of Idaho was charged with and plead guilty to a crime. Sen Vitter did not. At least that's the hook everyone is hanging their hats on.

And, yes it is a pretty weak hook because the crime is a misdemeanor. Going 65 mph in a 55 mph zone is also a misdemeanor.

[argentino]

actually, not a bad idea...years ago a local new york television station set up a sting where an individual went up to 20 police officers on the street claiming to have found a wallet with a couple of hundred dollars in it, out of 20 police officers 19 turned the wallet in at their precinct with the money intact...then the same was done with 20 cab drivers and the results were the exact opposite, 19 out of 20 did not turn the wallet in...imagine a dateline type show offering bribes to congressmen/senators?...it would at least keep the congress on their toes...

[speakswithforkedtongue]

Follow a certain Senator from South Carolina around with the initials "L.G."
I think there's a story there.

[alkamm]

A little hypocrisy goes a long way, but Republican hypocrisy seems to be on a schedule a few stops farther than most of us get off.

The uses of hypocrisy should include trying to inculcate respect for your children's elders even if you have little respect for some of them, or had little respect for your own elders. A healthy hypocrisy learns the benefits of not admitting to your children all your drunken binges, casual sex, or experimentation with drugs. At least until they are old enough to have made up their own minds about the subjects you so conveniently forgotten. That might be called healthy hypocrisy.
If, as a Senator or Vice-President, you support the right of your daughter to be a lesbian, you should probably bite the bullet and vote for public policy as liberal as that which you extend in your own family policy. Such honesty would be a courageous form of leadership, but it is a commodity much more finite than the infinite hypocrisy of Republican moralists.
Of course, they also vote like oil was in infinite supply.

[adzeman]

This could present a major constitutional crisis. After one season it would be likely that quorom would be unreachable. Unless there was a provision to hold sessions in the GOP wing of a federal prison or change the law so Moral repugs could teleconference from their cells and assorted public bathrooms, we could see the legislature come(pardon the pun) to a grinding(pardon the pun) halt.

[JimR]

Brilliant! Chris Hansen will also grill the nabbed Senators about their "stance."

[gala1]

MOTHERS FOR ANSWERS
TUCKERMANIA

What, so life experience is choppped pate?

Here you have Mullah Tucker, proven catnip, out in the trenches (well,stalls,actually). There he is, keeping the world safe for nepotistic,kewpie-faced, uninformed yet highly opinionated, dead-airtime neocon bores,and you choose to go with Chris Hansen ,a guy who has yet to admit ever throwing a punch to score a cheap rating point?

Who wouldn't tune in to watch all that Brooks Brothers brawn doing what he does best to some hapless cruiser without so much as getting his cute little bowtie out of joint?


gala

[zizyphus]

Hilarious article!

To Catch a Senator is sure to have many episodes. Unless the Republican Senators get wind of the sting, then they may choose to avoid public toilets altogether, and borrow some of Senator David VitterÊ"s diapers.

[SILVERAD0]

very funny.

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