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Obama: Don't Ask, Don't Tell How I Feel About Public Option

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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - President Barack Obama told reporters today that when it comes to supporting the so-called "public option," he is in favor of a "don't ask, don't tell" policy.

"Don't ask me if I support it, because I won't tell you," the president said.

As the negotiations over health care reform reach a crucial stage, Mr. Obama said that for his own part he was in favor of "the silent option."

Elsewhere, New York Yankees slugger A-Rod and actress Kate Hudson informed the press that now that they are a couple, they would like to be referred to jointly as K-Rudson. More here.