Obama Proposes Gas-bag Holiday

After a week in which a chorus of television pundits talked about the Rev. Wright controversy ad nauseam, Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama introduced a proposal today to silence such repetitious discussions.

"I am proposing a gas-bag holiday," Sen. Obama told a capacity crowd in Indianapolis. "Under my plan, all gas-bags would go on vacation until the second week of November."

Some observers called the Illinois senator's plan a shrewd one since, in addition to the pundits, it seemed guaranteed to sideline the Rev. Wright himself for the next four months.

But within minutes of floating the idea of the gas-bag holiday, Sen. Obama came under fire from several prominent gas-bags, including MSNBC's Chris Matthews.

"This whole gas-bag holiday thing raises two important questions: how much has the Rev. Wright controversy hurt Barack Obama?" he said. "Also, how much has the Rev. Wright controversy hurt Barack Obama?"

CNN's senior gas-bag, Lou Dobbs, said that Sen. Obama's proposal of a gas-bag holiday should make Americans "question his patriotism."

"The right to be a TV blowhard is as American as wearing a flag pin on your lapel," he said. "By the way, isn't Hussein a Mexican name?"

Elsewhere, Iran "definitely has an active nuclear program," said new White House spokesperson Paula Abdul.

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com. He is the host of "Countdown to '08" at the 92nd Street Y on Tuesday, May 13 at 8 PM with his special guests Calvin Trillin (The New Yorker), Susie Essman (HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm) and Jonathan Alter (Newsweek, MSNBC). For tickets, go to 92y.org.