Poll: Americans With Pants on Ground Offended By Hit Song

MINNESOTA (The Borowitz Report) - The song "Pants on the Ground" has become a huge hit since being performed on "American Idol," but a new poll suggests it has not found favor with one key group of Americans: people who wear their pants on the ground.

According to the University of Minnesota's Davis Logsdon, who has been conducting a yearlong survey of the attitudes of people who wear their trousers in a droopy manner, the song is "no laughing matter to the millions of Americans who have made a choice to wear their pants on the ground."

The poll asked respondents the question, "As someone who wears his or her pants on the ground, do you think the song 'Pants on the Ground' reinforces a negative stereotype?"

Professor Logsdon indicated that even some of the song's lyrics that do not deal directly with the "pants on the ground" issue have offended low-pants-wearing individuals.

"Many people who wear their pants on the ground do not wear their hats turned sideways," he said. "They strongly believe that there should be entirely separate song about that." More here.