08/04/2010 02:28 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Bristol's Baby Daddy's Another Baby's Daddy!

First it was true teenage love, and then an unwed pregnancy and an imminent gunshot kiddie wedding. Then it was a sensational tabloid split, with Baby Daddy trashing his famous almost-in-laws. Then poor Grandma was horrified as these two crazy attention-starved, money-grubbing kids got back together, disingenuously avowing their love on the cover of People as Baby Daddy confessed to having lied about Granny's many warts. Then the unthinkable happened: Baby Daddy lied yet again, telling his Baby Mama he was headed to California for a hunting trip but instead visiting his other baby...the one his almost-soon-to-be-teen-bride didn't know about. And once again Baby Daddy, the nightmare who may finally go away for Granny, abruptly got kicked to the cold, Alaskan curb.

Welcome to the Palin family, where good old fashioned conservative family values are about as foreign as the Russian skyline.....ya know, the one Mamma Grizzly can see from her Wasilla window. While daughter Bristol and Baby Daddy Levi Johnston are the gossip gifts that keep on giving to Democrats, they've given Mama G nothing but fire-breathing heartburn. How can Ms. Death Panel possibly spin this PR fiasco? Remember during the 2008 campaign how she claimed Bristol's situation demonstrated true family grit? Yeah, maybe for The Adams Family.

And now with Palin on the campaign trail once again, with self-righteous, morality-police guns ablaze, it's comic relief listening to her Tea Party drivel about family values and "taking back America" to the way our Founding Fathers would want it. But ya know what would really make the Founding Fathers heads spin? The Palin family's media-whorish, amoral behavior. You betchya!

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