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Ann Brenoff

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Are Homeowners More Attractive Than Renters?

Posted: 06/25/2012 5:51 am

There's a couple in my community where the 6-foot-2-inch woman, a former model, towers over her 5-foot-4-inch businessman husband. As a less-than-kind observer noted: The husband may appear much taller when he stands on his stacks of money.

(I did say less-than-kind, right?)

But as someone who has written about real estate for much of my career, I do have this unscientific observation to make: When midlifers are dating, they would prefer to date a home owner than a renter. Why? Again unscientifically, they associate homeownership with stability and security.

I get why they feel that way -- on face value. But scratch below the surface of their logic, especially in these economic times, and all you get is dirt under your fingernails. Almost 30 percent of homeowners are upsidedown on their mortgage. That means their homes are worth less than what they owe on them. And more homeowners than ever are in some stage of foreclosure -- heading for losing their home altogether and damaging their credit for the foreseeable future.

Renters, on the other hand, are currently thought of as the smart people.

Trulia.com did a study recently that looked at how housing situations intersect with our search for mates. Obviously we can dispense with the idea that we think it's OK for a 50+ man to still be living with his mother in her house, but we may give him some bonus points if he's moved Mom into his. What about dating someone whose adult children have moved back home? While it's more common, it's also more complicated.

According to the Trulia survey, only 5 percent of unmarried U.S. adults would prefer to date someone who has a roommate of any stripes. Living alone means no distractions and more privacy.

A majority -- 63 percent -- of unmarried U.S. adults said it didn't matter whether their significant other owned their own home or rented. That said, there were more than a few picky daters out there who do care. Women in particular were more likely than men to prefer dating a homeowner versus a renter -- 36 percent vs. 19 percent.

Which gets us back to the why. Let's face it ladies, the fact that someone owns their own home isn't likely to make them less likely to cheat or lie or more certain to call when they said they would. But it's a lesson that post 50s have apparently heeded: While 44 percent of millenials (18 to 34 year olds) felt that homeownership does equal commitment, only 26 percent of Baby Boomers swallowed the Kool-Aid on this one.

What's your view? Is it sexier to own or rent?

EARLIER ON HUFF/POST50: 12 Retirement Homes For Under $89,000

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  • Palm Desert, CA $295,000

    We found two hot-weather hotties in Palm Desert, California, which offers activities such as golf and tennis; performances at the McCallum Theater; and more than 150 works of art in its <a href="http://www.palm-desert.org/arts-culture/public-art" target="_hplink">Art In Public Places Program</a>, along with shopping and dining. Both of these homes have pools (a necessity in the desert), were built in the mid-1990s and have two bedrooms. The first, <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/78614-Blooming-Ct_Palm-Desert_CA_92211_M23439-49113" target="_hplink">on Blooming Court</a>, is located at the end of a cul de sac, around the corner from the community clubhouse.

  • Palm Desert, CA

    The Blooming Court home has a gated front courtyard, double door entry and architectural foyer. It offers 1,800 square feet of living space. The pebble tech pool seen here has a cascading waterfall.

  • Palm Desert, CA

    The patio is trimmed in flagstone and surrounded by desert landscaping.

  • Palm Desert, CA

    Floor-to-ceiling windows flood the living room with light, and ten-foot ceilings enhance the spacious feel.

  • Palm Desert, CA

  • Palm Desert, CA $299,000

    The second home, <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/78723-Platinum-Dr_Palm-Desert_CA_92211_M14822-70399" target="_hplink">on Platinum Drive</a>, offers 1,600 square feet of living space including an office/den area.

  • Palm Desert, CA

    We like the private spa of this slightly smaller unit.

  • Palm Desert, CA

  • Palm Desert, CA

    Bright and open kitchen in the Platinum Drive home.

  • Palm Desert, CA

  • Simpsonville, SC $199,900

    South Carolina has been the "in" place to retire for a number of years. You can't beat the pretty, wide beaches there -- although friends tell us the summers can be steamy and there are those pesky hurricanes. But homes are more affordable and the complexes newer. Two for your consideration: First, this one-level charmer with three bedrooms and two baths <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/8-Fudora-Cir_Simpsonville_SC_29681_M58256-86605?source=web" target="_hplink">on Fudora Circle,</a> located in a 55+ community. Built in 2008, the home was recently reduced by $30,000. The development offers a heated pool, fitness facility, and clubhouse with pool table and fireplace -- even a small putting green to entertain friends and family.

  • Simpsonville, SC

    Open floor plans and high ceilings offer a spacious feel.

  • Simpsonville, SC

    We love the palladian window and fireplace.

  • Simpsonville, SC

  • Greenville, SC $199,900

    While it has a little less curb appeal, this brick home <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/204-Sandpiper-Way_Greenville_SC_29605_M59378-70758" target="_hplink">on Sandpiper Way in nearby Greenville</a> features a large entrance foyer, open living/dining room with fireplace and sunroom with lots of windows. The listing makes note of the proximity to the general hospital. (P.S. to marketing department: Maybe emphasize the pool instead?)

  • Greenville, SC

    Entrance foyer

  • Greenville, SC

    The home has an open living/dining room and wood flooring throughout.

  • Greenville, SC

    Sunny sitting area

  • Greenville, SC

  • Bluffton, SC $289,000

    Of course if you are moving to South Carolina, the place to be is Sun City Hilton Head, described by one resident as "a playground for people in their 60s." Yes, still affordable -- if you don't insist on being on the golf course. This <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/146-Argent-Way_Bluffton_SC_29909_M65279-93220?mlslid=313169" target="_hplink">two-bed, two-bath home</a>, on a private wooded lot, was built in 1998.

  • Bluffton, SC

    This expanded 2,042-square-foot home has a windowed Carolina room.

  • Bluffton, SC

  • Bluffton, SC

    The home offers an unusually large, 220-square-foot den.

  • Bluffton, SC

    Dining room has high ceilings and charming wainscoting.

  • Bluffton, SC

    The kitchen includes a breakfast nook surrounded by large windows.

  • Bluffton, SC

    Split bedrooms and baths provide added privacy for guests.

  • Bluffton, SC

    The outdoor patio in rear looks out onto woods.

  • Boca Raton, FL $309,000

    Florida invented retirement, didn't it? Snowbirds from the northeast, especially New York, long ago began migrating there in the winter. Eventually, they bought condos which tumbled in the housing market crash. Today, it's a bargain-hunter's paradise, although sales volume and prices are ticking up, so you might want to hustle on down there if Florida is in your future plans. The mother lode is of course Boca Raton (pronounced "tone" for those of you living west of the Hudson), where the median home price is now $409,000. We did find this unit <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/17031-Boca-Club-Blvd-Apt-81b_Boca-Raton_FL_33487_M54620-26034?mlslid=R3216507" target="_hplink">on Boca Club Boulevard</a> for sale at $309,000 </a>and regardless of whether the complex is exclusively for retirees, you can't walk down a Boca street without hitting one.

  • Boca Raton, FL

    Lobby of the six-story condominium; the property is on a golf course and has water views.

  • Boca Raton

    This 2,047-square-foot condominium has two bedrooms and three baths; the kitchen measures 18 x 9.

  • Boca Raton, FL

    The living room is an ample 25 x 15 and the dining room is 15 x 13.

  • Boca Raton

    Sitting area off the living room

  • Boca Raton, FL

    The community recreation facility

  • Port Charlotte, FL $279,000

    If you prefer something a little less glamorous than Boca, there's Port Charlotte, located along Florida's Southwest Gulf Coast, between Sarasota and Naples, in an area known as Charlotte Harbor & the Gulf Islands. Here retirees can explore one of the world's largest protected marine estuaries; stroll miles of beaches; visit more than 70 parks and preserves; and enjoy fishing, paddling and sailing. The area is home to 16 golf courses and numerous annual sporting events and recreational facilities, as well as theater, dance, music and spas, according to charlotteharbortravel.com. This home <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/13308-Golf-Pointe-Dr_Port-Charlotte_FL_33953_M61785-53047" target="_hplink">on Golf Pointe Drive</a> is nearly 2,100 square feet with three bedrooms and two baths.

  • Port Charlotte, FL

    The kitchen and breakfast nook include wood cabinets, stone counter tops, tile back splash and built-in desk.

  • Port Charlotte, FL

  • Port Charlotte, FL

    The home has a private heated pool and spa.

  • Port Charlotte, FL

    This gated community has a golf course, club house, tennis courts and fitness area.

  • Sun City West, AZ $259,900

    The funny thing about Arizona politics is that they make you either want to move there tomorrow or forever stay away. Little middle ground when it comes to Arizona. But regardless of your view on the state's attitude toward gays, immigrants or guns, for retirees, there is great bang to be had in the retirement dollar buck. A <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/13746-W-Summerstar-Dr_Sun-City-West_AZ_85375_M10993-81274" target="_hplink">2,500-square-foot home on a golf course</a> location with an asking price of $260,000? The Phoenix area may be Boca Raton West.

  • Sun City West, AZ

    The home, built in 1985, has tile floors throughout and vaulted ceilings in the great room.

  • Sun City West, AZ

    The kitchen measures 11 x 11.

  • Sun City West, AZ

    The unit overlooks one of the seven golf courses in the Sun City West, a master-planned community designed for people 55+.

  • Sun City West, AZ

    Relax in the evening on the exterior back patio.

  • Mililani, HI $230,000

    Upon getting their first whiff of aloha spirit, many people have to be dragged to their returning flights home. It's not pretty, trust me. And the reality is, for many, Hawaii is a great vacation spot but a harder retirement location. You are a plane ride away from friends and family and the medical care on some smaller islands isn't what you would find near a major medical teaching hospital. That said, there's <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/951050-Makaikai-St-Unit-16e_Mililani_HI_96789_M80658-53743" target="_hplink">this charming little condo in our price range</a> and we're feeling the tropical breezes already.

  • Mililani, HI

    This two-bed, 1.5 bath condo is a compact 872 square feet.

  • Mililani, HI

  • Mililani, HI

    The common space includes a community garden.

  • Mililani, HI

    The condo includes a small patio/deck and space for an outdoor grill.

  • Seal Beach, CA $259,000

    The grand poobah of retirement communities is of course LeisureWorld. There are LeisureWorlds in many locations, but we are partial to the one in Seal Beach, California, where the rules are reportedly iron-fisted, but the property highly regarded. There's a <a href="http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/13220-Nassau-Dr-209a_Seal-Beach_CA_90740_M14235-39578?mlslid=P779729" target="_hplink">tidy corner home with greenbelt views</a> and 1,100 square feet for $259,000.

  • Seal Beach, CA

    Walls are freshly painted in neutral tones with white trim.

  • Seal Beach, CA

    One of two bedrooms

 

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There's a couple in my community where the 6-foot-2-inch woman, a former model, towers over her 5-foot-4-inch businessman husband. As a less-than-kind observer noted: The husband may appear much talle...
There's a couple in my community where the 6-foot-2-inch woman, a former model, towers over her 5-foot-4-inch businessman husband. As a less-than-kind observer noted: The husband may appear much talle...
 
 
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09:53 PM on 06/26/2012
I dont know if I should be admitting this or not, but most of the women I have been dating wouldnt look twice at a guy renting unless he had a really good reason (or was renting the Taj Mahal). Maybe I need to find a better class of women.
09:23 PM on 06/26/2012
Stupid writing. Find someone that you love and admire for who they are.
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DismayedRepub
300Mm/s Not just common sense, it’s the law
02:29 AM on 06/26/2012
I’m smart enough of a person to know not to date someone so shallow that they prefer a home owner over a renter. I look marvelous.
12:00 AM on 06/26/2012
Owning outright or underwater noose with bank logo around your neck does need to be clarified.
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DismayedRepub
300Mm/s Not just common sense, it’s the law
02:30 AM on 06/26/2012
There are homowners and homebuyers. The bank is the homeower for the later.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
joyz41
Standing for Fairness for All
10:08 PM on 06/25/2012
A person who looks for a property owner to marry is misguided and shallow. The renter is better off alone.
10:00 PM on 06/25/2012
Are these divorced or widows or widowers looking for new spouses? Most young couples start off as renters, don't they? Oops, I just noticed this was in the Post 50 section. Never mind.
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danny saunders
ma nishtana?
09:58 PM on 06/25/2012
You can keep your house! Give me freedom and my rental anytime!
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DismayedRepub
300Mm/s Not just common sense, it’s the law
02:33 AM on 06/26/2012
My house is paid for. My rent is only $1800 a year in the form of property tax. I'd guess you pay that much in two months?
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danny saunders
ma nishtana?
09:22 AM on 06/26/2012
I stand by my original comment. : )
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Stephen a Fazekas
09:58 PM on 06/25/2012
LOL to homeowner ship, keep trying to re inflate the bubble Ann

If you can rent the same property for a less payment then the purchase price, Why on earth would you buy? That right there shows many properties are still over inflated in price and still needs to come down
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sibil
Fringe Left is no better then Fringe Right
10:14 PM on 06/25/2012
Except MY house has a LOWER mortgage then any 2 bedroom apartment in ANY have way decent neighborhood in Seattle/King County. $883 a month...

and I have a REAL garage, REAL trees that I own, and nice neighbors with NOBODY above or below me banging away if I get to loud @ night.

NO screaming rug rats in the apartment next door either...

So renters.. enjoy your "freedom"...

LMAO!!!
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Stephen a Fazekas
06:36 PM on 06/26/2012
both have their pros and cons, watch your town goes broke and decides to double the property taxes
09:55 PM on 06/25/2012
Is this article related to the National Realtor's Association's recent ad. campaign propagandizing the benefits of home ownership. (Not that it's a bad thing, but the ads are ridiculous).
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
orcinous
Close Guantanamo, pass a jobs bill, end the drones
09:51 PM on 06/25/2012
Homeownership is over rated. Most people move within 7 years making owning and selling and buying nd selling a home again and again a pain and major expense. Better to rent until you retire or you can buy a house cash. People in this economy are probably moving a lot more from job to job, plus income security is not as good in this economy.
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10:22 PM on 06/25/2012
If I had it to do over again, we would rent. We're not upside-down on the mortgage or anything like that, but we also can't take advantage of job opportunities the way more mobile people can.
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Qntino
Succinctly Southern, Very Progressive
10:23 PM on 06/25/2012
I'll never buy again. Too much of a hassle with taxes, repairs and oh yeah, I am currently underwater and cannot refinance. Once the market comes back, I'm selling. As unsteady as the economy has become, I need the flexibility to move around.
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pilchsum
All my good comments don't make it past the mods.
09:42 PM on 06/25/2012
Has anyone here seen "The Money Pit" with Tom Hanks and Shelley Long?
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derzahlaludba
Go Miskatonic Squids!
09:41 PM on 06/25/2012
Back in my day we used to call that a golddigger. Now they call it "financial security." They had it right the first time. I'd rather be dead than tied down to a wife and mortgage.
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belladio
Not in the mood to suffer fools
09:32 PM on 06/25/2012
People are really that shallow to have "homeowner" on some financial checklist when dating?

No wonder the divorce rate is so high.
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sweetpatriot
28,woman,healthcareworker,polyglot,bisexual.
12:43 PM on 06/26/2012
Some do.
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09:27 PM on 06/25/2012
When I started out many many years ago I did the homeowner route. However after awhile I started to think that I was making the home my savings. Instead I ditched home ownership putting what I would have been spending into mutual funds etc. Result was that I was almost ready to retire at 50 with $3M in the bank. I say almost because I ended up getting sick at 42 and even as a C level officer with a platinum health package I went bankrupt trying to pay the medical bills not covered by the insurance. Now, 25 years later I still have not recovered. Today if I would have owned a home I don't think anything would be different as I more than likely would be one of those underwater. Both paths are correct and as an individual it is up to each of us to decide what works for us. And if an individual does not appreciate someone because they chose a different path that is their loss and their problem.
reciprocat
On November 6, 2012...God blessed America
12:47 PM on 07/19/2012
Just out of curiosity; would universal healthcare have helped your situatioN?
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twitch1956
09:22 PM on 06/25/2012
I have rented in ALaska for twenty years. I recently bought a cargo van (I call it my serial killer van) and am turning it into a camper for the summer months. This fall I plan on selling anything and everything without sentimental or intrinsic value and putting what is left into said van and heading out for the open road. you can't do that if you are waiting for someone to buy your house.

Look out lower 48... here I come.
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DismayedRepub
300Mm/s Not just common sense, it’s the law
02:38 AM on 06/26/2012
I hope you break down someplace in B.C.
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twitch1956
02:19 PM on 06/26/2012
I am not traveling thru Canada. But thanks for all the negative karma sent by you to me. Guess what... Karma is a funny thing. You should expect mechanical problems with you vehicles very soon.

Couldn't happen to a nicer Republican.