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7 Solid Reasons to Smile

Posted: 02/19/11 12:02 PM ET

Why smile? Because you can. I do not mean to be flippant. The better question might be, "Why would you want to smile?" -- especially if you are feeling sad, angry or frustrated. I will come to that. Read on.

This week saw the publication of Drs Ron and Mary Hulnick's latest book, "Loyalty To Your Soul." I listened to an inspiring interview with them on Hay House Radio. Among other topics, they spoke about the freedom and benefits to be gained from exercising personal accountability. Personal responsibility -- our ability to respond -- opens the "I can" conversation.

In his new book, "Workarounds That Work," Russell Bishop illustrates the freedom of choice we each have in situations that seem to block us. We have choices. We can.

Philosopher Rene Descartes famously said, "I think, therefore I am."

These days, I would say, "I am, therefore I can."

Celebrity Smilers

Actors Colin Firth, Dame Judi Dench, Julia Roberts, and Leigh Taylor Young have award winning smiles. Even when Dame Judi is playing a serious role, I can always detect a sparkle of humour in her eyes. A smile could break through at any moment.

If you are feeling down and dispirited, you may well have every viable reason for suffering a bad mood. Forcing a smile could be denial of what is so for you in that moment, and stressful. Have you ever "had" to smile to a number of people on a formal occasion, and found yourself suffering from an aching jaw as a result?

There is plenty to cause desperation and distress in our presently crazy and apparently confused world. You would have to be a robot not to be challenged by it from time to time. This is why we need counter measures -- not only to survive in the chaos, but also eventually to thrive, in spite of it.

If you are feeling out of sorts, it is better to take a moment to acknowledge that to yourself inwardly. Then take a deep breath. Let it go. Do not dwell in a heavy mood longer than is necessary. Sometimes, bad feelings are there to catch your attention. Awareness of them gives you choices. You can stay, or you can go. Let go, relax, be patient. Sooner or later, everything changes. Smile.

In my recent post, "Seven Rules For Getting Unstuck," I identified smiling as a key strategy for getting free of a particularly heavy frame of mind and emotions. It amazed me how something so simple and doable could make such a profound difference in my ability to function effectively again.

Here are seven reasons to consider why you might want to smile more:

  1. Smiling for Your Health. In his article, "Smile, Laugh, Connect: The Key to Increased Morale," Dale L. Anderson, M.D. writes about smiling releasing the endorphins which help to reduce pain, relax muscles and enhance the immune system.
  2. Smiling to Be More Resourceful in a Challenging Situation. If you have an important interview, or a conflict to resolve, take a deep breath and smile to yourself. Smiling will help you to feel more in charge and able to deal with whatever takes place.
  3. Smiling for a Better Night's Sleep. When your day has been stressful, smile as you lie down. Recall happy memories. Relaxing with a smile will assist you to let go of the day and enter a more peaceful rest.
  4. Smiling for Opening Doors to More of the Good in Your Life. If necessary, "fake it until you make it." Even if at this moment you do not feel you have anything to smile about, smile anyway. When you do this enough, you will soon find that you have plenty to smile about.
  5. Smiling to Lift Your Spirits: It Is Free and Does Not Put on Weight. Foods like chocolate and ice cream can help you to feel good, but the side-effect can be inches on the waistline. When you smile, it is like opening a door to the joy within you. You can smile when no one else is around, and you will feel less alone. Smiling will make you look younger.
  6. Smiling to Connect With Others. When you smile, you communicate openness and become more attractive. People will warm to you. Smiling as you speak on the phone will enrich your conversation. A smile indicates a certain trust and confidence that no matter what is going on, you are in touch with the goodness of life. You have something to smile about.
  7. Smiling to Serve . You never know the comfort a smile may offer to a person immersed in their troubles. A miserable wet day is a great time to smile, as you dodge by others huddled under umbrellas on the street.

Which memories make you smile? Whose smile most warms you? I would love to hear from you. Keep smiling!

***

Please feel free to leave a comment below or contact me at anne@annenaylor.com
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Why smile? Because you can. I do not mean to be flippant. The better question might be, "Why would you want to smile?" -- especially if you are feeling sad, angry or frustrated. I will come to that. R...
Why smile? Because you can. I do not mean to be flippant. The better question might be, "Why would you want to smile?" -- especially if you are feeling sad, angry or frustrated. I will come to that. R...
 
 
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07:20 AM on 02/21/2011
Hi =)
Another amazing article!
It's true, honest it is.
Thank you for this!
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
10:27 AM on 02/21/2011
Thank you, lola 0907.

Happiness and joy to you!
Anne
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Dr. Judith Rich
Rx For The Soul: www.judithrich.com
01:44 AM on 02/21/2011
Dear Anne,

This morning while out walking the dog, I passed a man and he smiled at me. He didn't look like the kind of person who would smile easily. I'd "sized him up" prior to the smile, and I was completely wrong! While he looked to be quite the grumpy type, he flashed a sweet smile at me and it made me light up! His smile was outside my expectations. But maybe smiling at strangers always lands that way. I wonder........ anyway, it was a sweet little moment that touched something in me today.

And then I came home and read your post on smiling and thought, yes! A smile is like a little kiss from God. Sublime!

Thank you so much for this post. I loved it!

Blessings,
Judith
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
10:26 AM on 02/21/2011
Hello Dearest Judith,

Thank you so much for that most wonderful cameo from your morning. I begin to see how wondrous this 70th year of yours is unfolding.­..

I had not thought of a smile as being a little kiss from God. I love that!

Here's to many more Kisses coming your way.

With much love and appreciati­on to and for you,
Anne
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Dr. Judith Rich
Rx For The Soul: www.judithrich.com
11:45 AM on 02/22/2011
And an abundance of kisses to you as well!
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MerrieWay
11:16 PM on 02/20/2011
I love the saying, "A smile is the shortest distance between friends." I'd add a hug too. Being a comedy actress...I was paid to giggle and have fun. It spilled over into my life...being more lighthearted. It is a choice, both tears and laughter heal. And a smile is a definite precursor to a giggle. Find the things that make you smile, and guaranteed you'll get a lot of smiles back. Big Hugs, to you Anne...You have a smiling heart...Merrie Lynn.
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
10:22 AM on 02/21/2011
Dear Merrie Lynn,

So good to see you here again! Yes, I too add hugs when it comes to closing the distance. Thank you for your loving and lovely kind words

What joy to have been paid to giggle and have fun. Now that's what I call a wonderful vocation.

Big hugs right back to you,
Anne
09:19 PM on 02/20/2011
Remember - the best smile is really in the eyes.
I have an old photo. Its the most remarkable example of the subtleties of the human face. The photo is of a young, very pretty, anonymous peasant girl somewhere in the Middle East. If you take a finger and cover her eyes her expression could be quite bland and emotionless. Move your finger down and cover her mouth and her eyes are smiling from ear to ear; like she's thinking "...are you taking my picture?" Its really a cool picture!
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
01:00 AM on 02/21/2011
Thank you, okornot . I so agree with you - it is the eyes that smile. The picture you describe sounds wonderful.

Happiness to you!
Anne
12:04 PM on 02/20/2011
Nice article!
10:43 AM on 02/20/2011
Thank you Anne, i agree 100% with your article and certain comments. i've been living in the exciting and wonderful (albeit chaotic and crowded) city of New York for ten years and the power of a smile is limitless! Please enjoy my beautiful friend's (clara lofaro via youtube) music video regarding the same, "Just Smile." i guarantee you a genuine heartfelt smile in seconds :-)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyRgt527oL4
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:58 AM on 02/21/2011
Dear flocolorado

Thank you for your comment and the link - I love it! One of these days, I plan to come to New York to experience for myself some of that exciting and wonderful city of New York. A far cry from my quiet Mediterranean shores!

Wishing you a joyous week ahead!
Anne
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07:02 AM on 02/20/2011
I smiled when I read this article ; ). I know people who are just so miserable and with their lives that they are not able to crack a smile. I had a co-worker who literally would get angry at the sound of laughter. It is very sad when you think about just unhappy some people are.
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
09:55 AM on 02/20/2011
Dear prettybutterflies

What a great name you have! I agree it is sad to see someone who seems committed to being miserable.

My understanding is that what we think about, we tend to get more of. So if smiling becomes a focus, we probably have more of it. I smiled a lot when I was writing the article!

Happy blessings to you,
Anne
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12:50 PM on 02/20/2011
Thank you Anne! I just wanted to add a quick true story. When I was in high school I smiled all of the time, and to everyone I came in contact with. Well one day a guy approached me and said hi in a way that we were old friends. He said, "you don't even remember me do you". I said, well no I am sorry. He said, well you smile at me all of the time, and he said there have been days were I was sad or depressed about something and the smile from you made me happy!!! That just made my day and we are still friends now and I am 31.
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
04:50 AM on 02/20/2011
Anne,

In the last few years I have tried smiling at people more in those passing situations where so often only a glance is offered, or it seems eyes are averted to avoid contact and at times, there may be good reasons to do so, but most often there are not.

What I have noticed is that people are not only willing (I generally receive a smile in return), but they seem pleased, and at times relieved to drop the patina of protection, false as it is, that avoidance allows... to make contact, to be seen, to be recognized as real.

The seven reasons are all important and beneficial. However, I would put increased emphasis on 4-7 in that they bolster the interpersonal connections so many are concerned about.

There may be value in texting emoticons, and
certainly there is benefit in a happy face on a written note.
But, a face-to-face smile is still priceless,
because a face-to-face connection is too.

After reading your article, I cannot get the "Bye Bye Birdie" song, "Put on a Happy Face" out or my head... truth be known, I don't want to. You are right, smiles are “simple and doable”, and I would add that they are also contagious.

Wonderful article and great advice, and oh yeah... :o)
Lawson Meadows
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
09:52 AM on 02/20/2011
Hello Lawson

Thank you for your joyful words! Yes, nothing quite beats the face-to-face smile, and the connection it offers.

I agree with you - people seem to want to smile and sometimes need the invitation of a beckoning smile to do so.

As another person commented about smiling and peace, a contagious, smiling, peaceful world - wow, that would be very nice! I was thinking about that this morning.

Happiness and joy to you,
Anne
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DiogenesOfAlaska
Mitt Romney for president - of the Cayman islands!
01:55 AM on 02/20/2011
I was about to add solid reason no 8: smiling to prove to folks that you don't care that your incisors are missing.

But then I realized that it's already covered by reasons no 1 to 7.

There should be a key combination to express that. Any suggestions out there for the toothless smile in the face of destiny?

:-)
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
09:45 AM on 02/20/2011
Hello DoA,

What an important point you raise here! Yet, I have know some very wonderful toothless smiles. There remains joy always beyond the incisors, or lack of them.

Something about the smile that speaks of a state of mind that pays less regard to outer appearances.
I suppose that is freedom.

Always good to hear from you! Thank you.

Happiness and joy to you,
Anne
12:48 AM on 02/20/2011
What a great reminder! Remembering when my son was a toddler...each day when he would hear my car in the driveway, his screaming, "mommy" and taking a giant leap into my arms, his arms around my neck the moment I walked through the door. Now my dog starts running toward the door in a frenzy when he hears my car, and would like me to catch him in my arms! The smile of my son warms my heart the most. In this fast paced world, the smiles of the stranger out in the world particularly warm the heart.
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
09:40 AM on 02/20/2011
Dear Kelley,

Your comment made me smile! What wonderful images you have described. Very heartwarming.

Thank you!

Warmest good wishes to you,
Anne
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Eli Davidson
Award Winning Women's Small Business Coach,
06:19 PM on 02/19/2011
Yes! I just did an interview with Melissa Rivers after the TV show we did. Smiling is one of the tips she shared for other women business owners. Smiling puts others at ease and allows you to move your agenda forwards.

Thank you for such a great post!
Eli
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:55 AM on 02/20/2011
Hi Eli,

Great to see you here and thanks for your addition to the discussion. Smiling is enlightened self-interest when it comes to moving forward. Love this!

Loving and joy to you,
Anne
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KathleenQYD
www.QuintessentialYouDesign.com
05:39 PM on 02/19/2011
My niece, Olivia makes me smile....each and every time I am in her company! Such unabashed and unedited life!
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:52 AM on 02/20/2011
Kathleen, I love your phrase: Such unabashed and unedited life!

It is inspiring to me. Thank you!

Joy to you,
Anne
05:05 PM on 02/19/2011
Excellent advice. Peace starts with a smile.
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:51 AM on 02/20/2011
Thank you, MochaLite -

Right now I feel like placing a smile over all those countries and people who are presently in conflict. May we find many ways to grow the peace.

Gratefully,
Anne
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Ed and Deb Shapiro
04:03 PM on 02/19/2011
You don't have to have a reason to smile.

All you need to do is stretch the muscles of your face and prepare to feel wonderful.

Which memories make you smile? seeing the face of our godchild Maya

Whose smile most warms you? Deb

BTW Anne - you have a sweet smile :-))

Ed
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:47 AM on 02/20/2011
Hello Lovely Ed,

Thank you!

I love this:
ll you need to do is stretch the muscles of your face and prepare to feel wonderful.

Yes!

Here's to growing a more smiling and peaceful world....

Big hugs to you,
Anne
03:47 PM on 02/19/2011
I haven't been feeling too well for a little more than a year now so I really appreciate you sharing this knowledge. Nothing is more important than a person's happiness.
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Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
12:45 AM on 02/20/2011
Hello Guy,

I am sorry to hear you have not been feeling too well for more than a year. I hope that you will soon be feeling much much better.

With joy and love for your happiness and well-being,
Anne