In a spiraling gaffe that many supporters feared showed his age, Senator McCain included Napoleon Bonaparte in a flurry of name dropping during Friday night's debate. "Senator Obama doesn't understand what it takes to forge ties with foreign regimes like I do," McCain said, with increasing agitation. "I've been to France! I've sat at the negotiating table with Napoleon Bonaparte. I split a goddamned croissant with him for Christ's sake!" McCain continued, as his staffers bit their fists in despair. "Did you split a croissant with Napoleon freaking Bonaparte, Senator Obama? I didn't think so. Have you even eaten a croissant before?" he continued, cutting off a visibly uncomfortable Jim Lehrer.

McCain went on to explain his close relationship with the French General in even greater detail. "I was the one who warned my fellow maverick not to enter Leipzig in 1813 because I had the foresight to know that his Grand Army was no match for Germany's Sixth Coalition," he barked, as Obama unsuccessfully suppressed the giant grin from overcoming his face. "That's the kind of judgment we need in the oval office today," McCain continued, "or we put our nation at risk of a musket siege of even greater magnitude than my dear friend Napoleon and his brave troops endured."

With that, McCain seemed to finally drop the topic, but was heard muttering "croissant" several times throughout the remainder of the debate.