Ok, John McCain. Ok, Barack Obama. I've had it. One of you people is lying and really ought to fess up. McCain just announced his VP. And how did he announce her? "The next Vice President of the United States." And how does Obama talk about Joe Biden? He calls him "The next Vice President of the United States." Well that doesn't work, guys, OK? That doesn't follow. They can't both be the goddamn next Vice President of the United States because we only get one at a time. That's the rule. That's how it works.

So own up, got it? Cause America can see right through your god damn games. Neither one of you said, "Might be", both of you said "will be", and will be is a statement of fact. Don't you be fucking with my heart. If I hear, "This is the next Vice President" I need to start getting attached. And I do. I heard Biden, and I didn't like the guy, but you told me he was the next Vice President and I believed you. But now McCain is saying this lady is going to be the next Vice President...I just don't know what to do anymore. Stop fucking with my head!

God damn it, if one of you doesn't say who's the liar, I'm holding you both responsible.