PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP, SARAH PALIN! SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU'RE NOT QUALIFIED TO RUN FOR THE PRESIDENCY, NOW, OR FOUR YEARS FROM NOW! YOU WERE A CAMPAIGN GIMMICK. A HAIL MARY PASS BY A LOSING QUARTERBACK! YOU KNOW NOTHING! YOU ARE TOO DUMB TO BE ON THE NATIONAL...

Some Republicans now praising Barack Obama's election as a wonderful milestone in our nation's history may actually be sincere. While others come off like the sneaky little shit who brings brass knuckles to a fistfight and beats the other guy senseless until his victim's enormous big brother shows up and...

Between the plumber heralding an Obama victory as "the death of Israel," and the twit of a talk show hostess prattling on about the evils of Socialism, the Straight Talk Express has morphed into some sort of GOP clown car, with one geek after another piling out of it. Yet,...

In a revelation bound to send shock waves through the already battered, bruised, and flailing McCain campaign, Joe Six Pack and Joe the Plumber have confided to friends that they have fallen in love and intend to marry. The two Republican campaign symbols met at a recent rally and confessed...

One of the rituals of politically-oriented talk shows is the occasional appearance of someone from the other side, either to explore another dimension of an important issue, or to present the illusion of impartiality. One such appearance tonight was that of former Bush speechwriter David Frum on Rachel...

Like many Democrats and other educated-Americans, my soul has ached during the 8-year rule of the boy king. 8 years of an intellectually and morally challenged president and his cadres of misanthropes, underachievers, dirty tricksters, and other assorted villains, thieves and scoundrels. So perhaps the single aspect of the McCain/Palin...

For Republicans to celebrate with the rallying cry: "She didn't fuck up!" is more than a little sad. Last night was the Senator from Delaware vs. the Governor from Stepford. She grinned like an idiot. Trotted out the folksy, aw shucks bullshit. It was all false and contrived. From her...

There's an old joke about a guy's wife walking in on him in bed with another woman. When confronted, the guy denies it, saying: "who are you going to believe, me or your lyin' eyes?" It's with the same degree of reality-denying hubris that Sarah Palin strides into tonight's debate,...

Sarah Palin's recent gaffe-fest proved two things: one; it's hard out there for a simp. And two:

SHE'S NOT QUALIFIED TO BE VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES!

Still, it seems Mr. and Mrs. Maverick ain't gonna blink. Instead, she's been whisked off into...

Bye, Sarah. After the latest Katie Couric interview/non-sequitur festival, Ms. Squawking Points has officially outed herself as way too much of an imbecile to keep on the ticket. Even with those furtive glances down at her cheat sheets, she still couldn't cobble together a coherent response to any...