It's 2009. I know this because of the many lists circulating around the internet: the best so-and-so of 2008 and the worst. In a Venn diagram version of these lists, I have one thing that falls directly in the middle, the Fox News version of Obama. 



I don't know what...

We elected a black guy! Pretty sweet.

When I turned on the news after Barack Obama won the election, I saw white people tripping over each other to declare that racism was over. 

Nothing makes me happier than seeing rich white pundits shed a bit of their white guilt in their...

"I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately." -G.C.

Watching stand-up on TV today you would think the quote was "I think the duty of the comedian is to find the line, then run from that line as...

After one term of George Bush, everyone was saying there was no way he could win a second term. They said anyone could beat this asshole, so Democrats put that theory to the test when they picked John Kerry to run against him.

And then, like Americans were those...

Based on her speeches, here is how I assume Hillary might handle everyday life events:

1. The Grocery Store

CLERK - Mrs. Clinton, that will be 20 dollars.

CLINTON - 10 dollars it is.

CLERK - Uh...20.

CLINTON - 10 dollars. You got it!

CLERK...

Now that Marc Penn is no longer working for Hillary Clinton there are only so many jobs this union busting back door dealing Blackwater PR man can do. Some suggestions

1. Guy who takes peoples parking spots

2. Baby puncher.

3. Guy who sits at the back of...

Debates are coming up again, which means we will finally return to my favorite pastime: The Great American Sad-Off!

This is where the candidates try to out-sad each other by telling horrifically heartbreaking stories about themselves, or people they met on the campaign trail, instead of dealing with the...

More information could come out, but it seems as of now that Eliot Spitzer had sex with some prostitutes. When a headline reads "New York Governor Involved in Prostitution Ring," it makes it sound a little intense. So intense, that my little brother Nick called me saying "fucking...

When a race is summed up as Old School vs Change, you would think the best option for the old school candidate is to try to embody change. Be new, happy, exciting. But instead, Hillary Clinton has decided to become cartoonishly villainous by mocking Obama's call for hope. Watch upcoming...

People say Ralph Nader is running on ego. Really? What kind of fucked up masochistic ego do you need to enjoy the kind of attention he gets.

Every time I watch the news he gets verbally raped and pillaged like an Iraqi village being invaded by Blackwater (here I...