U.S. Intelligence sources have confirmed several of Al Qaida leader Ayman al-Zawahiri's claims that Barack Obama is responsible for the current fighting in Gaza due to his inaction. Al-Zawahiri's first complaint centered around the President-elects inability to veto congressional legislation supporting Israel. This, al-Zawahiri argued, was yet another...

As the Washington Times has pointed out, the price of oil is now lower than when Mr. Bush first took presidency, thus invalidating the bumper sticker "When Bush took office, gas was $1.46." Furthermore, the article claims, this will help the oil legacy Bush will leave behind. True,...

Controversy is still raging over whether or not George W. Bush was constitutionally justified in revoking a pardon for Isaac Toussie who is in jail for mail fraud and lying to investigators. Mr. Toussie was 1 out of 19 pardoned. While it is customary to choose criminals who deserve special...

This Christmas, America learned that while it takes only one cell phone to ruin a movie, it takes only one .380-caliber handgun to fix a movie. This very special cinema lesson came from James Joseph Cialella Jr. of Southern Philadelphia, who is accused of temporarily enhancing the viewing...

A panic has overtaken California since Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger announced that California may be headed towards a "financial armageddon" if current budget gridlock continues. Political analysts worry Gov. Schwarzenegger does not have the appropriate qualifications to stave off this armageddon. In fact, records show that Gov. Schwarzenegger has...

While rummaging through the garbage of rival publications, I found a nostalgic Letter to the Editor which, unfortunately, was never printed. In the interest of free speech, as well as an underlying wish to rationalize why I have been looking in trash cans, I shall now reveal snippets of this...

In a recent press conference in New York Federal Hall National Memorial, nearly-ex-President George Bush revealed that free market capitalism "is far more than economic theory." Free Market Capitalism is a friend. A best friend.

President Bush defended Free Market Capitalism, saying it wasn't perfect, but it was...

Among the many world leaders congratulating President Obama, none were as heartfelt as that from Prime Minister Vladimir Putin. His spokesperson and current President, Dmitry Medvedev, delivered the letter personally. Obama's staff released a snippets from the correspondence as translated by a 20-year-old Jew from California:

President Obama,

In a surprise move, former Russia president Vladmir Putin endorsed Senator John McCain for President citing McCain's "socialist policies" as his motivation. Most analysts believed Putin would be hesitant to endorse a ticket which includes a voyeur situated a mere 55 miles from the nearest Russian shore. Others worried that...

A recent measurement in Western Pennsylvania confirms America's worst fears about racism: there isn't enough of it. Even after John Murtha tried reassuring voters that Western Pennsylvania was a steadfastly anti-black society, crowds have started to worry that pure American prejudice won't be able to determine this election. The force...