Odds that...

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, whose constitutional referendum was just narrowly rejected by voters, just knows Russian President Vladimir Putin is making fun of him: 12-7

Gillian Gibbons, the British teacher pardoned by Sudan's president for letting her students name a teddy bear Muhammad, celebrates with a nice pork chop and a huge glass of alcohol: 8-5

Karith Foster, the black woman sidekick joining Don Imus back on the airwaves, grits her teeth when a production assistant brings her Popeye's for breakfast: 2-1

At tonight's premiere of "Juno," Jennifer Garner pretends to be humble, Michael Cera masks his anxiety with deadpan improv, and Jason Bateman is pleasantly surprised he's still acting: 6-4

The staff of the new reality show "Who Wants to Marry a U.S. Citizen" is delighted when they get an application from Nicolas Sarkozy: 1-1