Entertainment

With LA Weekly columnist Nikki Finke putting her popular Deadline Hollywood Daily blog on hiatus, 23/6 takes over where she left off with our regular, up-to-the-last-few-days-or-so writers' strike coverage.


BREAKING: Unnamed Agency Lets Go of Assistants, Assistants Exclaim "Thank God!"

More strike fallout. An insider tells us that a big Hollywood agency (HINT: It's usually referred to by its initials) has laid off a small army of assistants today, much to the relief of the assistants.

"Thanks, WGA," said Robert G., an assistant of a prominent literary agent, "Tomorrow morning I can wake up, and be reasonably sure that no one will hurl a cell phone at me for the rest of the day. I haven't been able to say that in three years."

Another assistant, Martha D., told us that she plans to spend her downtime volunteering, saying "I've always liked helping people less fortunate. You know, the kind who don't scream if their water's not at room temperature."

The assistants were given two weeks severance, and as many 8-week-old churros as they could carry.

LATEST: AMPTP Won't Return Until Reality, Marshmallow Sno-balls Are Off The Table

It's now been over 40 days since the AMPTP walked out on negotiations with the WGA, and now the "why" has become a bit clearer. Not only did they want reality jurisdiction off the table, but also some marshmallow Sno-balls that were part of the catered breakfast.

"Those things are gross," said the AMPTP's head Nick Counter. "They had this nice catered breakfast—croissants, elephant ears, a variety of jams—but then they had a package of Hostess Sno-balls. They look like wet mittens. I almost puked looking at them. Who eats those for breakfast?"

"I eat those for breakfast," replied WGA West President Patric Verrone via phone interview this a.m. "They were always part of the negotiations, and now Counter is using them as an excuse to not come back to the table and negotiate a fair deal. They are staying on the table. Now if you'll excuse me, I need a nap. I'm beginning to crash."

UPDATE: NBC's Zucker Greenlights New Reality Program, "So You Think You Can Be a Pussy Wearing a Red Shirt and Holding a Sign?"

NBC's quest to fill its writerless schedule has led head honcho Jeff Zucker to the front gates of his own studio. "So You Think You Can Be A Pussy Wearing a Red Shirt and Holding a Sign?" will feature cameras pointed at a line of striking writers, and the biggest pussy will be selected by Zucker himself. (SPOILER ALERT: Everyone wins!)

LATEST BREAKING UPDATE: In a brilliant move of network synergy, Zucker has decided to unleash a few of his popular "American Gladiators" on the "Pussy" contestants, armed with clubs and bike chains.