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"No, you can't"- telling your kid that he's not going to be the next Obama
Kids, "that one" is a genius. You aren't.
Did Barack Obama's win make your dumb kid think he can be president? Even though he can't find a map of the world on a map of the world? Obama's success means the rest of us have to have "the talk" with our children, in which we'll explain that there is no f*cking way their retarded asses are going to be President of the United States so please do not say that's why you can't clean your room, you lazy sacks of shit. What? Mom loves you!
How did we break down the news to our little ones? We broke it down by percentages.
Why You Can't Be President
*You're stupid. 4%
*You're white. On both sides. 18%
*You're gay. Yes, we know. And sorry, but it's gonna be awhile. 22%
*We're the Heaths of Wasilla, and you're our daughter, Sarah. .01%
*Whenever you have a math test, you like to "suspend your campaign." 16%
*You're our dog. Now get off the goddamn couch or we're giving you to the Obamas. 7%
Filed under: Barack Obama, Barack obama president, barack obama anyone can be president, barack obama historic presidency, pie chart, voting pie chart, first black president, obama first black president
posted 12:01 am on 11/12/2008
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posted 1:38 pm on 11/10/2008
You're now a Fan of politicoprincess.