November 14, 2008

Bush has two regrets; We provide the other 37

Wish I'd been a little more awesome.

In an interview on Veterans Day, President Bush was asked to reflect on his regrets over his two terms in office. Bush said he regrets, "saying some things I shouldn't have said, like "dead or alive" and "bring em on." Bush also said he wishes he hadn't spoken in front of the "Mission Accomplished" banner to declare an end to major combat operations in Iraq in 2003.

Okay, that's two! Looks like he needs help with the others, so we threw together a brief list of some (thirty-seven) of the things Bush should probably be regretting right about now.

A Quick List Of Stuff George Bush Should Regret
(Off The Tops Of Our Heads)
  1. His existence
  2. His decision to go into politics
  3. Not learning how to better run oil companies so he wouldn't have to go into politics
  4. His decision to run for president
  5. His decision to run for a second term as president
  6. Every word spoken into a microphone since January 20th, 2001
  7. That time in 2001 when he shouted at Dick Cheney, "You know what, screw it. You run the country if you're so smart!"
  8. Ignoring the way Alberto Gonzales was always saying, "Geneva Convention, Schmeneva Schmonvention!"
  9. Those times when he let Donald Rumsfeld make decisions
  10. Revealing the identity of a covert CIA operative. Not cool!
  11. That time when he said "Osama, Saddam. What's the damn difference?"
  12. Letting the country fall into economic ruin
  13. Not getting Scooter Libby to take the fall for some more stuff
  14. That "wait for this to blow over" position on Katrina
  15. Not learning how to keep from smirking while addressing the nation about certain issues, such as Katrina
  16. Not figuring out how to control the weather to keep Katrina from happening
  17. Not giving more people hilarious nicknames, like "Turd Blossom"
  18. That "Iraq" kerfuffle
  19. Not giving more speeches in front of banners that read, "Danger: Under Construction" or "Not Finished" or "This Mission is going to take at least six or seven years, if we're lucky!"
  20. Saying, "all right Harriet, you've talked me into it."
  21. Never really savoring the good moments.
  22. Giving up alcohol
  23. Giving up coke
  24. Going back on coke
  25. Giving it up again
  26. Betting Cheney $1,000 they'd lose in 2004
  27. Not getting to know Terri Schiavo better
  28. Not constantly losing wars
  29. Beating Dad's "years in office" record.
  30. Thinking, what the heck, it's just a pretzel
  31. Not flipping the bird more often at Cindy Sheehan from behind the tinted windows of his passing limo
  32. Not taking it as a bad sign that Karl Rove has a forked tongue
  33. Responding to a report titled "Osama Bin Laden Determined to Strike Inside The United States" by repeating the title in a mocking, high-pitched voice that made Cheney laugh real hard
  34. Not saying, "Brownie, we should sit down for a performance review in the next week or so"
  35. Not calling it, "No Super-Gifted Child Left Behind"
  36. Those twenty or twenty-five times when he should have offered his resignation but decided to "wait it out"
  37. Not doing more to avoid the inevitable indictments sure to come next February once they start finding out about "the real bad stuff"
Did we miss any? Add your own to the comments section!
Posted by: 236.com staff      I’m a fan of 236.com staff
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Comments (30)
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gap
posted 4:03 pm on 11/19/2008
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Well, love him or hate him, the time is coming near to say goodbye to George W. Bush. I would like to extend an invitation to anyone who has something to say to this President to post an open letter to GW at http://goodbye.us . This is a project to essentially create a time capsule of feelings and thoughts about the outgoing administration. So please, check it out and share!

clementukes
posted 3:21 pm on 11/18/2008
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Looking like Bill and(or) Ted, on their excellent adventure, when he's around other statesmen. And, following through on that by using the word "awesome," entirely too often.

ChipW - 1 Reply
posted 6:42 am on 11/18/2008
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Believing that God was serious when He said "Go to Iraq."

replying to ChipW; posted 4:38 am on 11/21/2008
That might be one of the best comments I have ever read.
natteringnaybob
posted 12:18 pm on 11/17/2008
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Not speaking in front of a sign that says "Do not follow into work area."

imnoone
posted 1:52 am on 11/17/2008
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Appearing on Letterman every night.

treetracker
posted 12:00 am on 11/17/2008
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Raiding the US Treasury for his base, "the haves and the haves more."

Lynn57
posted 11:06 pm on 11/16/2008
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Not going to Vietnam so he could have some REAL military cred

DanaDANE
posted 8:45 pm on 11/16/2008
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The phrase I regret him saying the most: "I accept my party's nomination."

RegurgitatedGuts
posted 6:13 pm on 11/16/2008
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being too distracted by some murmuring doomsayer in a suit to enjoy the end of "My Pet Goat"

billbig
posted 5:13 pm on 11/15/2008
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Being incompetent and uncaring for the common people who put him in office--these are the folks born into the party culture and never check to see who they vote for as long as its republican---example Western Michigan and the South--

sterculius
posted 2:09 pm on 11/15/2008
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Being unable to correctly pronounce the word "nuclear" and
having an uncanny resemblance to the Mad magazine character Alfred E Newman aka Melvin Coznowski.

shortandwide
posted 11:20 am on 11/15/2008
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Not obeying the U.S. Constitution. In all fainess I heard a second hand qoute of this, Calling the U.S. Constitution "Just a G.. Damned piece of paper"

mschlee
posted 10:46 am on 11/15/2008
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Try 'Em & Fry 'Em


FREE AMERICA

REVOLUTIONARY (DIRECT) DEMOCRACY

adzeman
posted 1:19 am on 11/15/2008
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Not telling on Cheney when he started locking him out of the Oval Office.

Dingoangst
posted 9:03 pm on 11/14/2008
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Having to get ready to burn in Hell for all of eternity.

addicted2purchase
posted 6:17 pm on 11/14/2008
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Giving up on that 4th grade McGuffey Reader

IonaTrailer
posted 5:37 pm on 11/14/2008
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Making the whales ears bleed!

IonaTrailer
posted 5:36 pm on 11/14/2008
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Accepting Jesus as a personal excuse for being a complete asshole.

IonaTrailer
posted 5:32 pm on 11/14/2008
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Making the whales ears bleed!

dmoudy3
posted 5:05 pm on 11/14/2008
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Not allowing that 'pretzel' to do its job!

utena
posted 4:50 pm on 11/14/2008
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Making everyone in the world hate the U.S.

Al
posted 4:20 pm on 11/14/2008
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Thinking all those "signing statements" would only be noticed by the deaf reporters.

clamattina
posted 4:19 pm on 11/14/2008
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Not teaching John McCain how to effectively use Joe-the-Plumber the way he used Jessica Lynch and Pat Tillman...

Sans
posted 2:46 pm on 11/14/2008
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Not having a good grasp on the English language.

larry278
posted 2:45 pm on 11/14/2008
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Being born into the Bush family

jan4insight
posted 1:34 pm on 11/14/2008
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Not sticking his head under a running faucet with a cloth over his mouth, so he wouldn't be agreeing with those who said "waterboarding isn't torture."

newportjoey
posted 11:57 am on 11/14/2008
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Not gracefully giving Laura a divorce 9 years ago.

Milhouse
posted 11:15 am on 11/14/2008
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Not joining his exiled brother Neil in the wilderness (what ever happened to that guy anyway?)

distractionsilike
posted 9:56 am on 11/14/2008
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Not endorsing Obama, like every other self respecting neocon did

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