Barack Obama

Barack Obama already (further) tarnishing Bush legacy

January 22, 2009 - Why, Barack Obama, aren't you just the sassiest! On his very first day in office the new president is already breaking some of his predecessor's long-standing rules. President Obama was spotted behind his Oval Office desk without wearing a jacket, a definite no-no in the Bush...

From The Room: Excerpts from My Obama/Lost Fan Fiction

January 22, 2009 - EXT - THE ISLAND - DAY BARACK OBAMA, HURLEY, and CLAIRE are running through the jungle. All are sweating, out of breath, and wide-eyed. Obama leads the group, determined. OBAMA: Come on! The group crashes through the trees and brush, frantic. Finally, we see what is chasing them: the smoke mon...

From The Room: Day One, A.B. (After Bush)

January 22, 2009 - New eras don't usually start right away. The Pleistocene Era didn't get going for at least 40,000 years, and the Sixties didn't really start until 1964. But the Obama Era kicked into gear right away. I could barely keep track of Day One. Here's what...

Advice from a failure

January 21, 2009 - In the grand tradition of...uh, tradition, outgoing president George W. Bush left something for Barack Obama on the Oval Office desk. And no, it wasn't a steaming pile of excrement. It was note wishing the new president well and offering some advice on life in the White House...

From The Room: Fox News Doesn't Care About Black People

January 21, 2009 - At Fox News, inauguration day looked like the first afternoon a Negro used the local country club tennis courts following a legal settlement. While there were many forced smiles and obligatory discussions of this "historic" day, there was just as much complaining about the size of the event, the ex...

From The Room: Liveblogging the Inauguration

January 20, 2009 - 11:11 Dan Quayle is back!! 11:11 And he brought Al Gore!!! 11:14 I am so sick of hearing about George H. W. going sky diving 11:15 Bill doesn't look happy 11:15 Haha one Senator objected to Hillary's nomination 11:17 How is he...

The 23/6 "Pretend You Were At The Inauguration-o-Tron"

January 20, 2009 - Hey, were you at President Barack Obama's inauguration? Really, you were? No, you weren't, you rotten liar. But don't worry. We'll totally vouch for you, because we're lying to all our friends too. We weren't there, either...nope, we were cheering the ceremonies while...

23/6 Op-Ed: It's 12:13 PM, President Obama... where is my job?

January 20, 2009 - Dear Mr. President You have been commander-in-chief for seven minutes now, and we have one question for you: Where is our job? You promised to provide 3 million jobs and yet here we are, still drunk, unemployed and wearing Saturday night's pajamas. We have used this time...

Confirmation hearing floor photographers: A love story

January 16, 2009 - [The following is a fictitious imagining of what might have taken place during this week's Senate cabinet confirmation hearings, had anything interesting been allowed to occur] Andy thought he knew the drill. Day after day of sitting Indian style on the floor, some guy's knee drilling int...

Okay, Obama, we get it...you love everyone

January 15, 2009 - Not only is Barack Obama about to become the next president of the United States, but he's also a better father than you. Parade magazine has posted an open letter Obama wrote t...

Boring cabinet confirmation hearings no one cares about ROUNDUP!!!

January 15, 2009 - Everyone's wringing their hands over Eric Holder and Tim Geithner. But what about the other nominees? The ones who are sailing right through their confirmation hearings? The ones who pay their taxes and don't pardon guys who illegally trade with Iran? It's time to take a look...

Can Obama save a business just by showing up? If yes, can he stop by later?

January 14, 2009 - The Times reports that DC is expected to experience a restaurant resurgence simply because Barack Obama is going to be eating food there. Apparently, all Obama has to do is show up at a restaurant and it will be "on the map" and do...

From The Room: White House Damage Check

January 14, 2009 - It was wise of Obama to bring all of those former Presidents together, if for no other reason, to do a walk through of the White House, so that he doesn't get blamed for any damage already done. I've never...

Great moments in presidential athletics

January 14, 2009 - Barack Obama loves his basketball, so much so that he's already taken heat for daring to suggest that the White House replace the Nixon-era bowling alley with a new basketball court. As it stands, the only place to shoot hoops at the White House is a small, poorly...

From The Room: Biden Pushing for Inaugural Moon Bounce

January 13, 2009 - Washington, D.C. -- For several days now, Vice President-elect Joe Biden has been lobbying members of the Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies to include as part of the official swearing-in ceremony a moon bounce, an inflatable structure that people can enter and bo...