05/23/2005 10:00 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

I’ve Got Nothing Against Four-Hour Erections, But…

Viagra for rapists and child molesters? It’s your federal government at work! Look, I realize that this outrage is the result of some ludicrous loophole in the Medicaid system and that no elected official ever sat down and thought, “ can we make it possible for perverts to enjoy the benefits of a four-hour erection on the taxpayer’s dime?” But how come these geniuses in Washington never “accidentally” create legislative loopholes that make it easier for working mothers to afford childcare or sick kids to see a medical specialist or wounded war vets to call their loved ones without being stuck with the long distance bill? How come it’s always big corporations or the owners of gas-guzzling SUVs -- or impotent rapists -- who seem to catch a break?

Update: Proving, once again, the truth of the adage that "sunshine is the best disinfectant," the AP reports: "A federal agency began notifying states Monday that they do not have to pay for Viagra for convicted rapists and other high-risk sex offenders."