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Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW

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The No. 1 Cheapest Solution To Stress

Posted: 04/27/2012 7:40 am

We all know that one of the best ways to manage stress is exercise. Of course, we could also include massages, vacations, and healthy food as effective stress managers. But all these solutions require special circumstances that cost us money and time -- money and time that we often don't have in sufficient quantities.

So what's a stressed person on a shoestring budget or full tilt schedule to do? The absolute cheapest, bargain basement stress management tool is right in your own mind -- the practice of gratitude.

Gratitude is the antidote to our most stressful thoughts. In an environment of gratitude, negative emotions cannot thrive. Dr. Robert Emmons, a positive psychologist, has shown how practicing gratitude can raise your "happiness level." Neuroscientist Rick Hanson, Ph.D., promotes the practice of "taking in the good" because it deactivates our bodies' stress response and counteracts anxiety and depressive moods.

Focusing our stressed minds on the things that we're grateful for is like dousing a fire with cool water. Gratitude is habit-forming. With some practice, we can develop the habit of turning our attention to the plethora of blessings in our lives. Gratitude is not about ignoring the hard things in life; it is about honoring the gifts.

Whenever you practice gratitude, let yourself really notice the good feelings and allow the sensations and emotions to soak into your body and your memory. Inspired by my book Shortcuts to Inner Peace, the following simple exercises can be woven through your day to create a fabric of happiness and gratitude.

"Good Morning Sunshine" -- When you first wake up in the morning, lie in bed with one hand on your upper chest and one hand on your lower belly. Think of three things in your life that make you smile. Breathe in gratitude and let it fill you.

"See Food" -- As you eat your first bite of a meal or a snack, look at the food you put into your mouth and give thanks. Try to "see" where it came from and all the steps that were required to have it arrive on your plate. Imagine farmers, factories, truckers and chefs, each step an integral part of the journey to your mouth.

"Job Fair" -- Just before you begin your work for the day, think of three things about your job that you really appreciate. Even if you're not thrilled with your job, look to see if you enjoy your co-workers, certain customer interactions, or simply the fact that you get a paycheck that allows you to pay your rent or mortgage.

"At Your Service" -- When you're paying your bills (as you write the check or send the money online), think about the service you have and be grateful. Aren't you happy to have a cell phone? Wouldn't life without electricity be tough? Doesn't the medical bill reflect your own access to Western medicine? Notice the tension recede when you face your bills with gratitude instead of resistance.

"Home Sweet Home" -- As you open the door to your home, reflect on a few qualities of this particular house, this unique home, this constellation of dwellers that improves your life. Most people take their home for granted. Here is an opportunity to be aware of your home as a gift. Let the feelings of comfort, safety and ease trigger a smile.

"Rest in Peace" -- As you lay your head on the pillow at night, reflect on your day and observe 3 things for which you are thankful. They could be simple pleasures or large successes from the day. As you recall them, try to re-experience and savor them anew, expanding the feelings within your body and absorbing the memory into your mind.

Don't let stressful circumstances ruin your days. Once you start to see the details in your life through the lens of gratitude, you will find yourself happier and less stressed. No extra time or fancy equipment needed -- gratitude is yours for free!

For more by Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW, click here.

For more on stress, click here.

 
 
 

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We all know that one of the best ways to manage stress is exercise. Of course, we could also include massages, vacations, and healthy food as effective stress managers. But all these solutions requi...
We all know that one of the best ways to manage stress is exercise. Of course, we could also include massages, vacations, and healthy food as effective stress managers. But all these solutions requi...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
OhMaryOO
it spite of everything, yes, let's!
11:34 PM on 05/01/2012
Oh my gosh! There was very similar advice from "The Secret" which I took to heart for about a year... That was the single most productive year of my life (so far as I'm only 23)... And once I stopped that practice I really lost grip of my life in all seriousness.

I've just started up with the morning & night routine about two months ago and I'm already feeling/seeing the difference. This is a practice we should all (at the very least) try. What's the harm in being grateful... after all it could be worse!

Thank you for this article! It's supplied me with more situations in which I should give thanks.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
09:34 AM on 05/02/2012
You're welcome! Thanks for sharing your positive experience with a gratitude practice. Once you get going, even the smallest things become miracles (running water, electricity, transportation, grocery stores!) If you've got this down at age 23, I predict that your entire life will be more gratifying, no matter what your circumstances. Cheers, Ashley
07:23 PM on 05/01/2012
Best article of the day!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
09:35 AM on 05/02/2012
Many thanks! Ashley
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jf12
Esta vez saldré como las otras y me escaparé.
03:05 PM on 05/01/2012
The opposite of stressed is desserts.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Kellybelle22
Medicine. Marriage. Motherhood.
03:15 PM on 05/01/2012
Love that!! Will remember it for the rest of my days, and I hope I have your permission to use it freely. I have never heard it, either.
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jf12
Esta vez saldré como las otras y me escaparé.
03:59 PM on 05/01/2012
Sure. Is from my wife, maybe from facebook.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
04:14 PM on 05/01/2012
Very clever . . . . just, in moderation! (otherwise will lead to more stress)
03:33 PM on 04/30/2012
For many people, gratitude as a technique can actually work, at least for awhile. Eventually, even for them, it can become tedious to try to generate gratitude when stress seems to be our underlying reality.

The reason is that we erroneously identify the result (gratitude) as the cause of freedom from stress. Instead of seeing that gratitude emerges spontaneously from eliminating stress, we try to start with the result as a technique. It's popular (a favorite method of Oprah Winfrey), but the wrong direction of understanding.

Instead, practice a technique that actually dissolves stress: the unique, deeply restful practice of transcending. See other articles here that discuss Transcendental Meditation (TM) and Natural Stress Relief (NSR), two readily available instruction systems for learning transcending. By following a thought to the source of all thoughts, pure awareness, the nervous system spontaneously dissolves the internal stresses that generate most of our problems in response to external challenges.

Spontaneously and automatically, our stresses dissolve, starting perhaps with today's stresses, but eventually eliminating all the accumulated stress of a lifetime. In just a few minutes. And, effortlessly.

What happens then? Gratitude, love, acceptance, living in the Now, and strength all flow spontaneously from within, instead of having to be forced as techniques.

David Spector
President,
Natural Stress Relief/USA
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:08 PM on 05/01/2012
Hello David and thank you for your perspective and for sharing your effective techniques for dissolving stress. I'm a big fan of all types of meditation, including mindfulness and TM. Certainly stilling the mind and stimulating the parasympathetic nervous systems are terrific ways to prep the heart for gratitude. Cheers, Ashley
01:57 PM on 04/30/2012
I am very grateful for this article; I know that the author is correct.as I practice this every day. To the cynics and naysayers: try it. To those who support the author and have offered personal examples, I am grateful to have known you through your positive comments.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
04:08 PM on 05/01/2012
Thank you!!
01:40 PM on 04/30/2012
I live with nearly stress on a 24 hour basis. I think I'll give this a try. I once practiced gratitude, in all my prayers. Thanks for posting. I appreciate the time and effort that was spent to provide us with some time tested practices.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
04:09 PM on 05/01/2012
Good luck with the practice and I hope you find it helps to shift your experience with your stress. I appreciate your thoughtful words. Cheers, Ashley
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
kyosaku
Nothis non carborundum
12:24 PM on 04/29/2012
Attitude is not an accident that happens to us, It is a choice. When I was 16, I was depressed and dangerously suicidal. Now, past 60, I know that I have been blessed with such wonders that include that darkness, and a great deal of light.

Groucho Marks said it, ""I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
polyform76
07:28 AM on 04/30/2012
Thanks for that quote. I really enjoyed it. I read it a couple of times so I could remember it.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
04:11 PM on 05/01/2012
Exactly! Certainly you are an example of surviving depression and working wtih your mind. Congratulations! Ashley
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
ken derow
06:05 AM on 04/29/2012
This posting asserts that,"The absolute cheapest, bargain basement stress management tool is right in your own mind -- the practice of gratitude." Well being grateful for what we have in our lives is a great and wonderful tool to reduce stress and promote well-being, but, there is an even better tool. This tool is to create compassion for ourselves and for those we care for and care about. Compassion is free, it is abundant, it is self-reinforcing, the more you create and practice compassionate intent, ther easier it becomes to do so again and again in the future.

Compassion is the love, care, concern and attention we show ourselves and those we love and care for. It is all good, it has no negative unintended consequences. A compassionate individual is happier, more content, more physically and emotionally healthy and a more compassionate society, promotes a more peaceful and less violent world for all of us to live-in.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ashley Davis Bush
04:14 PM on 05/01/2012
Yes, three cheers for compassion. I agree. However, often people struggle with offering compassion for themselves. Truly, it is a difficult leap for many. I suggest feeling compassion for a loved one and gradually shining that light of compassion toward the self. Thanks for bringing up this topic. Cheers, Ashley
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
catmagnet
Independent thinker
08:30 PM on 04/28/2012
Actually, exercise can be FREE if you choose (I dance in my living room listening to a playlist I created on Spotify, which is a free music provider). Yes, there is the time expenditure, but do you really need to watch those extra hours of TV when you can do something beneficial for your body, mind and soul?

I found that since I started exercising 60-90 minutes daily, my stress level has plummeted. I do it first thing in the morning (5AM), and it puts me in the right frame for the rest of the day.

Don't get me wrong, I also practice gratitude, but I found that the combination of gratitude and exercise have made a HUGE difference vs. gratitude alone.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Judster
10:02 AM on 04/29/2012
Whenever I am feeling a little blue, I sit at my desk and write an electronic journal outlining all of the things that I should be PROFOUNDLY grateful for, and usually the list is fairly long, thankfully. I, too, find that gratitude and exercise work very well for me, and nothing beats an early morning exercise to set the right frame of mind for the day.

Fav'd.
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:15 PM on 05/01/2012
Exercise is fantastic, no doubt. It's just a little harder to pull off (for some of us!) Cheers, Ashley
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
realitytrumpsbull
Two 'alves of coconut!
04:41 PM on 04/28/2012
When we assume that everything will be as it always was, take it all for granted, that's when the door's open for calamity. The only constant is change, savor the flavor, because there are no guarantees in life.
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:16 PM on 05/01/2012
True . . . thanks for your comment, Ashley
01:15 PM on 04/28/2012
Gratitude is more powerful in transmuting negative energy and situations to positive. A free ebook gives examples of how the magical "Two Words' changed crisis' to blessings, how "thank you' brought healing, turned around financial ruin, brought a fatal diagnosis in a newborn to total recovery. The next step of counting your blessings, is being thankful for the challenges, while going through the challenges. Offered for free, "Two Words that Change Everything". only offered at:
www.GratitudeCreatesMiracles.com
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:17 PM on 05/01/2012
Excellent -- thanks for sharing this resource. Cheers, Ashley
12:47 PM on 04/28/2012
Gratitude is a great uplift. I agree.

One thing I did when the kids were teens and things could be stressful was keep an album with baby and little kid pictures. When I'd start to get stressed, I'd open the album, look at those sweet pictures, and list all the things I was grateful for about them when they were little. Then, I could go on and list what I was grateful for in them as teens. It really helped me keep perspective. Now they're adults, and I still look at their pictures on the wall and give thanks.
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:19 PM on 05/01/2012
What a fantastic idea! Thanks for sharing. Photographs speak volumes and help us keep everything in perspective. Cheers, Ashley
11:49 AM on 04/28/2012
Good article.. Look for good and you are sure to find it. Look for bad and you will find that as well. The one you feed thrives.......
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:20 PM on 05/01/2012
Exactly right!
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Luketalks
Insane? Vote for Repubs OR Dems expecting change
07:13 AM on 04/28/2012
I really like this article but laughed out loud with "Good Morning Sunshine". I live in Seattle and its usually, "Good morning 42 degree rainy day" :))
10:37 AM on 04/30/2012
Oh yes, I know...I visited your beautiful, CLEAN city last year and loved it. Also, the people were so so warm and friendly. I think of "sunshine" as an attitude, not a weather condition. I feel YOU are a sunny, precious person who loves life....no matter where you are and what ANY situation is around you. Enjoy. It beats the heck out of 100+ wet weather we have here in Florida in August!!
SharonB
I am alive.
07:42 PM on 04/30/2012
Luketalks, I live in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. In the summer we can have 100 days of sunshine with over 100 degree temps. Your rainy climate sounds like heaven to me. Haha!
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
themightyabealrd
screw the real world-I'm an artist!
04:45 AM on 04/28/2012
For roughly three years now, I've made a habit of 'counting my blessings' (enumerating things for which I am grateful specific to that day) at least twice daily. Not unlike your 'Rest In Peace' step! The list can contain mundane and profound items: my kids and grandkids being safe and well, great service from a barista or shop clerk, finding a new book by a favorite author, beautiful weather.
I used to have such a negative outlook, but now I find myself in a positive frame of mind more often than not. it's not a Pollyanna, ignore the bad things mindset, just a way to help me be more mindful of the totality of life.
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Ashley Davis Bush
04:24 PM on 05/01/2012
Yes, congratulations on turning your experience of life around with the simple, elegant, and profound practice of gratitude. Thanks for sharing, Ashley