If you believe the Mayans, 2012 heralds the end of the world. So we might as well enjoy every bit of it.
I guess I had my pregnancy test-run. I know the lay of the land now. I am ready for the next time, if it is meant to be.
The truth is everyone has stuff from childhood. In fact the perfect parents do not exist - if they did you would never leave home. Also we ALL develop systems and coping mechanisms that come from past experiences or traumas.
I'm 38 and have lived the other side of the world, worked for News Corp, trekked round South America, yet the idea of an empty house at night makes me feel like a five-year-old who is afraid of the dark.
I now realize I needed the miscarriage to work through some of these feelings before it happens again. I just wasn't ready. The big question now is when will I be ready?