Written by Cody Coombs for Babble.com
For some reason, my wife, Casey, and I have always been on different weight fluctuation schedules. She zigs while I zag. I zag while she zigs.
Just before we first got married, Casey went on a strict diet and strenuous exercise regimen hoping to hit a goal weight for the wedding. Meanwhile, I was in the middle of gaining noticeable weight. Casey pointed out that I no longer looked like the slim guy I was in high school and I took that as a challenge. I just wish I had better understood the change in metabolism that my body was undergoing at that time. My nightly jogging trips, interrupted by quick stops to the McDonald's for two Big Macs per visit, didn't seem to do the trick like they used to.
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6 months into our marriage, I was up to the heaviest weight that I've ever been in my life. The only real wake-up call that things were getting out of control was when I played basketball. I used to be able to cut around people without much problem, but I started to realize that I was no longer cutting around people. Instead, people were jumping out of the way hoping not to get plowed by the oversized train that was coming at them full steam ahead.
After some serious diet and exercise, I dropped down to my high school weight. Meanwhile, Casey gained quite a bit of weight while on an unnecessary medication. Several years later, Casey ironically dropped the weight while pregnant with Addie and I, you guessed it, gained weight.
And on and on and on the cycle went.
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Last year, I started dropping serious weight again while following a strict diet and exercise routine. Casey, on the other hand, believes she has gone up on the scale. Consequently, Casey has decided to begin a diet that will reduce her caloric intake and change the types of foods she eats. The rest of us in our family of four will continue to eat the foods that we've been eating.
Needless to say, Casey's change in eating habits will end up affecting the entire family. There's just no avoiding it and at some point, our Addie's going to ask why it is that her mom is always eating different things than the rest of us. She may even ask why it is that her mom is crying because she just wants that damn ice cream bar sooo, sooo bad.
Casey and I discussed how this would affect the family and we decided that while my wife is on this diet, we will be telling Addie that Casey is eating different foods to make her body healthier than it was before. We will not mention weight or looks or the size of our pants, and that's how it will be long after Casey ends this upcoming diet. And that's how it will remain until Addie is grown and off living on her own.
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Casey can do what she wants. She's a grown woman and she can make decisions that she feels are best for her body. If she wants to diet, I'll support her. If she wants to go on a nothing but ice cream for a week diet, I'll support her -- I may even join her on that one. However, Addie doesn't need to know Casey's true reasons for being on whatever diet she's on.
My 7-year-old daughter doesn't need to grow up wondering if she needs to go on a diet because her mom went on a diet. I want Addie to grow up understanding that everybody's body is different. We were all born differently with different traits and different strengths and there's nothing wrong with that.
I want Addie to feel comfortable with other people's differences and I want her to feel comfortable with her own differences. Self-comfort leads to self-confidence, and self-confidence opens doors that lead to success and happiness in life.
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It's been pretty easy to have the family's eating to my eating. We all eat healthy food. It's about portion control and exercise. There are no awkward questions regarding what I'm eating because we all eat the same food. I simply don't let my kids eat junk at home. On the rare exception of a night out at a restaurant, we all get something different, anyway, so what difference does it make that I get the Southwest Chicken Salad and unsweetened tea, while my son gets the double cheese burger and fries with his chocolate milk?
However, my daughter raved how much better her friend's mom cooked. The mom was Korean, I figured Oriental food was just better.
When I met the woman later, I found out all of her food was take out or frozen meals, LOL!
I have been on Weight Watchers more times than I care to admit. They no longer advocate not eating certain foods (they refer to them as "red light" foods). Instead, they say allow yourself a treat once in a while. If you cannot have a container of ice cream in the house without eating the whole thing, then go out and have a cup of ice cream (without all of the extra junk on it) or a cone, but not everyday.
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That sounds interesting. How did she eat, and how did you eat before you started eating like her?
Like I tell them, you have to move it to lose it. And replacing your morning bacon, egg, and cheese with a banana or yogurt wouldn't hurt either.
Why isn't your wife making meals for the whole family so no one needs to diet?
The woman cries because she wants ice cream? What kind of family do you have???
Please don't push the stereotype of the wife being responsible for feeding the family. That's just irritating!
But I agree with your point - why not just a healthier 'diet' for the whole family?
Another thing; Don't take a tv with you to watch your soap operas and munch cheetos all day.