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Facebook to Launch New Mandatory Social Security Number Section on Profile

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In technology news, Facebook has once again redefined the line of online privacy this week by launching a new mandatory "social security number" section on user's profiles. Users will now be forced to enter in their social security number right between their favorite movies and personal quotes, an addition that has caused quite a stir in the Facebook community.

"When I logged in yesterday, Facebook wouldn't let me look at my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's pictures unless I entered in my social security number first," said 24 year-old, Cindy Ballintine. "I really wanted to see what that fucking skank looked like and why he choose her over me, so I didn't really have a choice in the matter."

While users like Cindy are weary of the new security measure taken by Facebook, and aren't pleased with sharing their social security number with literally billions of dangerous people across the globe, the mere idea of not being able to write "happy birthday!" on that person's wall you were sort of friends with 7 years ago, or the inability to add Iron Man 2 to your favorite movies, or even not creating that trite and completely unoriginal Spring Break picture album, is something Facebook users just couldn't stand to live without.

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