Slowest. Election. Day. Ever.

If the 2004 election day were a movie it would be reviewed by local stations as "a high octane thrill ride," "an edge of your seat adventure," and featuring a "a surprise ending guaranteed to shock."

We're halfway through the 2008 election day and the blurb is more apt for an arthouse indie film or documentary: "thought provoking," "a deep meditation on life in America," or "a nuanced look at modern life." Where are the hysterical twin shrieks of voter fraud and voter suppression? Where are the Drudge sirens proclaiming the exit poll results like Moses bringing the Ten Commandments from the mountaintop? At this time in 2004, we had crazy news stories about machines in Philadelphia running up Kerry votes before the polls opened, wild speculation about turnout going one way or the other, not to mention the reverberations of the Bin Laden videotape being dissected every which way. Now we have nothing but a bunch of fawning op-ed pieces already debating the first 100 days of the Obama administration. Can't we gin up at least a little Tuesday mayhem before we get to the fawning write-ups of the campaign?

Lamest. Election. Day. Ever.

Comments

[metalpipe]

I am doing nothing but feeling dread about the technicians 'fixing' the voting machine 'issues' that mysteriously popped up today. As an electronics tech myself, I know simulated failures can be easily programmed into a machine's firmware, and vote counting can be just as easily be controlle/ changed internally without anyone knowing the better. Will there be a 'coincidental breakdown' at the end of the day so they can undo their software fix? Keep your eyes open.

[Geekboy]

I've noticed a relationship between the closeness of an election and accusations of fraud on both sides. Not that election fraud doesn't exist, but it's fairly powerless in the face of a clear majority.

[naeblisone]

There isn't less fraud going on, it's just that the perpetrators have gotten better at it. Now these college students and senior citizens won't even know that their votes aren't being counted. They'll just smile and put on their sticker thinking that they just performed their civic duty while the Rove-o-trons put their ballots in the shredder.

[thepalinator]

I would LOVE for this to be a "lame", boring election day. I'm nervous about some stories I've seen, though, about voting problems, not enough machines, etc. Hope you're right!

[AshleyMarie]

Why would you wish for anything other than peace and quiet??

Should we produce some painful and destructive mayhem and chaos just to entertain you?

I, for one, am grateful...

[StuartJoshua]

I think the silence is an indication that the repuglickins are losing, and thus are not trumpeting nuttin about exit polls; and are just hanging their heads and preparing for defeat.

This silence is infinitely better than the alternative, which would indicate strong repuke exit polling, and a mounting offensive to challenge dem votes, cause mayhem, etc, because they think they can win.

No, the silence is much better. Think of the silence as the sound of the repukelickins crashing and burning and submitting.

[weatherwaxx]

Problems in Virginia

In Philadelphia, a straight Democratic vote CANCELS OUT A VOTE FOR OBAMA (no vote-rigging on these machines, eh?)

GOP trying to disqualify students in Iowa

Florida areas with minority populations getting 1 machine each

Reports coming in from various sites about vote-flipping

How about this? http://www.wishtv.com/dpp/news/politics/Rep_poll_monitors_credentials_revoked
A republican "judge" was intimidating Democrat voters and got his credentials yanked.

There's more, but I figure you really need something to do besides pick your nose.

Mr Sarlin, a reporter is supposed to go out and FIND THE NEWS, not sit on his duff and wait for the teevee to tell him what's happening. Do your job or find another. Maybe sports -- there's more blood in it. THIS IS THE FUTURE OF OUR COUNTRY, NOT A GODDAMNED WRESTLING MATCH!

I worked two years on a high-school paper, and I could do your job better than you're doing it.

[ShawnMichel]

I'm in complete and total agreement. Well said.

[ohioan73]

Some drive-by Obama supporters just came by and put a flier on my house. LOL! Loves it!

[phoenics]

One word for you: Virginia.

[BSERIUS]

incidents like Black Panthers (black supremecists if you will) brandishing night sticks in Phille,, Hillary electioneering in NY,, Republican poll judges being kicked out in Pa

[owlsocks]

Agreed. And Seconded.

As an American presently living abroad, the television and online silence is deafening.

D_E_A_F_E_­N_I_N_G!!!

News please.

[biding4brilliance]

You want incidents like disenfranchisement and voter fraud? Because that's the only way you're going to get the crazy stories. I'm grateful that everything is going smoothly, more or less. We don't need mayhem.

[RebelAlliance]

Better. Than. The alternative.

[c64audio]

And we're grateful for it :)