Michele Bachmann Could Use a Good Sex Clinic

03/18/2010 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Why is Michele Bachmann obsessed with sex clinics? The Republican representative from Minnesota is so infatuated with the subject of sex clinics, she can't stop talking about them. And if that's not weird enough, Bachmann actually has taken a lot of time to make up elaborate untruths about the proposed health care bill to support her sex clinic fetish. It's surprising, because usually someone has to down at least three Cosmopolitans at a hotel bar before reaching this level of lie about sex.

Ms. Bachmann recently has brought her sex clinic obsession to Capitol Hill. For the second time in two weeks, Bachmann spoke on the House floor insisting that the Democratic health care legislation would set up school-based clinics encouraging promiscuous sexual behavior. She should know that America doesn't need to create school-based clinics to promote student sex. Horny teachers are doing that job just fine. Bachmann then read a letter from a 14-year-old female who found herself taking morning-after pills, abusing birth control, lying to her parents and skipping class to go to a clinic -- or as many women call that, high school.

Curious about Ms. Bachmann's fixation, I quickly scanned over the transcript from her September 30th speech on the House floor and discovered that Bachmann mentioned "sex clinics" 10 times, "sexually transmitted diseases" 3 times and "sexual activity" one time. I admit I got a little moist. With language like this, no wonder all those old republican politicians are dropping their pants and choosing beauty contestants as their running mates.

If this highly uptight, sex clinic rhetoric continues, may I suggest that Michele Bachmann do us all a favor, put down her book of extremist, paranoid propaganda and pick up a vibrator. Then all of us will be satisfied.