Manhattan Minnie: My Chihuahua Turns 6 On New Year's Day And Why It's Cause For Celebration

Mojitos may cost $2 in Vietnam and you can get a shirt copied for $15 but they also munch on Minnie's, Toto's, Lassie's and all sorts of dog, in fact anything that moves or breathes or walks and has a tail or fur. So how could I ever like that country when the love of my life weighs 6 pounds and wears a pink sweatshirt with "Princess" written in gold letters? Maybe I don't.

In fact, I don't get the place at all and wonder why we bombed that country or sent fine young people over there to die fighting for it. What were we thinking?

My visions of lushness and history were replaced by fumes from their highly dangerous new moped society and brassy Chinatown-like faux Perfumed Pagodas and altars piled high with Choco-puff cookies (the Vietnamese version of the Mallomar) and dongs (their currency) - I couldn't help wondering if the Monks snuck out from behind the curtains at night and ate all those cookies while watching TV - which by the way is the one item you see in every roadside hut and pagoda attached to wires so dangerously strung that one jolt and you're history.

And just where was the history or the culture or the gorgeous scenery? Well other than the Hanoi Hilton, where John McCain was imprisoned (Guantanamo Bay is Club Med compared to this hole) and which seems to be the highlight of every Hanoi visit, and the megatomb of Ho Chi Minh - whom we took to calling Pickled Ho because he is indeed pickled and brined within the tomb - I can't remember feeling the mojo and vibes of the country. It's basically a country devoid of a past - thanks to us and others.

While I complained my way through the dust and heat of India last Christmas, I at least got the attraction and felt the history. But Vietnam is a country long fought in and over and while they're big into building golf courses and have some very glamorous beach resorts, my hyperbole prone itinerary forgot to mention that the rainy season doesn't know it's supposed to end on a certain date; our best purchases were the pastel colored rain pouches we bought for $1.

But what makes me want to celebrate my Minnie's birthday is the recognition that I so judge a country by its wildlife and and there isn't any. I never saw a monkey or squirrel or anything that wasn't going to be lunch. At least in India there is a reverence for the spirit in all creatures no matter how poor the humans are. In Vietnam, it's clear my Minnie wouldn't have a chance.

So Happy Birthday Minnie and thank goodness we live in a country where most of us can celebrate and even spoil you.