Let Bush Be Reagan

New Rule: For the next 18 months, let Bush be Reagan. A completely dissociative personality who lets the real work of the nation go on elsewhere, while he sits behind his desk and hums. I don't think the problem is that Bush lives in a bubble. I say make the bubble thicker. Use the armor we can't get to the troops. For example, on this whole "bomb Iran" thing. Let's not, and just tell him we did.

Who's going to tell him the truth? Rove? Gonzales? Rummy? Scooter? Harriet Miers? It's like a haunted house. The douchebag cupboard is bare.

According to the Times of London, the Air Force has drawn up plans for massive strikes against 1,200 targets in Iran. The plan doesn't just call for eliminating Iran's nuclear program, but for taking out its entire military in one blow. Can Bush destroy another country's whole army? Why not? He did it to ours.

We'll get Condi to slip him a note. "Mr. President, Iran is free!" And he'll scribble some garbled bullshit on it, like "let freedom Purple Rain" and that will be that.

Mission Accomplished. Oh, and the astronauts you sent to Mars just called. They said to say "hi."

He'll never know. According to a classified report on White House crowd management, protesters are not only kept out of Bush's sight at rallies, they must be kept where he can't see them from his car. Frat boys are recruited to chant "USA! USA!" over hecklers. Bush has also been told that your approval rating is like your golf score, and the asshole with the lowest one wins.

He won't even mind. The only way they got him to Iraq this week was by promising he was going to Australia. It's like getting the dog in the car for his shots.

I'm telling you, we can totally get away with this Iran thing. It's not like he's one of those presidents who reads the paper.

Bill Maher is the host of HBO's "Real Time with Bill Maher" which airs every Friday at 11PM.

Comments

[goddam]

If anyone thinks things are a little too" far right with Mr. George W. Bush as President of the United States, you can thank your fifty stares he's not the guy that paints the yellow passing strips on the highway's.

[albalovescholo]

"Let Bush BE Reagan":

do you mean reagan, circa 1987, or circa 2007?

[Knowbetter]

Priceless!

[Oldekirk]

or better yet, impeach the son of a bitch already and all his time will be taking up defending himself.

[PatriciainManhattan]

Bill,

Great blog, as always! FOR TONIGHT: You've got to look into nuclear warheads being flown from north to south US last week by "accident"! That we even heard this is a military leak. The coverup is that it was an accident. The military leaker WANTS us to know that the nuclear warheads are headed for Iran, that never, never, is a nuclear warhead mounted accidentally, that there are just toooo many security steps involved for that to happen. No wonder our ground troops aren't going to be needed to conduct yet another illegal war; there won't be any Iran left! We've got to stop this horror NOW.

[fritzers]

A great post Bill! Thanks.

Americans wake up!
Don’t let W’s lies fool you.

Here's why W wants to Bomb Iran:

Iranians are a friendly and peace loving people and they love the American people and love the American democratic ideals. But their government is run by some thugs and thieves just like our own US government.

The reason W wants to attack Iran is to stop the flow of the oil from Iran, which has the 3rd largest oil reserves in the world, and then cause an astronomical increase in the price of the gas!
The war against Iran has nothing to do with any nuclear issue crap.

W took over the US by theft in '2000, then he attacked Iraq and intentionally shut down the oil supplies from Iraq (Mission accomplished was true) and since then the gas price which was about $1.50 a gallon in ‘2000, has gone up to around $3.50 a gallon.

Iran’s gas supplies are so very critical to the whole world, and when Iran is bombed, the Iranian oil exports will be stopped and the price of the gas will immediately shoot up like a rocket, ....possib­ly to 5 times the $3.50 a gallon or about $17.50 a gallon or more!

That's what W has done with the Iraq war and that’s what W wants to do with Iran war too:

constrict the flow of oil supplies so the oil companies can loot the public by raising their prices astronomically and start making $trillions a year, instead of $billions a year!

America is very sick, it is simply controlled by a group of thugs and swindlers who control all the 3 branches of our government and also......­..all the main-strea­m-pro-thug­s media too.

W does not give a damn what happens to the whole world as long as his family and his friends can loot America and the rest of the entire world.

Americans wake up!
Don’t let W’s lies swindle you, your country, your children, your grand children and......t­he entire world!

Thanks Bill.

[dotmafia]

You rock Bill -- Keep it up!
_

[ClaireVoyance]

Reagan said,"government is the problem." He was wrong! Bushkins has come to within a hair's breath during his presidency, gifted and stolen, of making Reagan right, far right.

[Mariel]

Bible prophecies have come true and could again.

The Bible, however, shows examples of how some guys repented and got off the hook.

For instance, Jonah told Ninevah they had forty days before doomsday. But they fooled him. They repented. God forgave them. Jonah went and sulked under a shrub.

Maybe if we repented, like the Bible says...Arm­agedon would not come true either.

Maybe the best intelligence is in the Bible, if you really read it, not just go on hearsay. Notwithstanding "prosperity for tithing"-preachers like Rev. Hagee.

[markusmarkus]

That's it! We'll rush a new version of the bible into production and give GWB the first (and only copy). The new bible will have a "newly discovered" chapter entitled "Numbers 1967." Whe GWN reads the new chapter, he will see the errors of his ways, and become a peaceloving human being.

The new chapter will talk about loving your neighbor, being a peacemaker, turning the other cheek, helping the poor and the downtrodden, and other such nice things.

Wait a minute - the bible already talks of such things and yet GWB is still a warmonger.
Peace! GWB - WPE - WCE
Mark

[justice4juveniles]

Bush smokes a different Bible.

[SmokeyC4]

Police State is right around the corner.

[mamacat]

How about comparing him to Nixon?

"We Won!! Now let's get the heck out of here!!"

[marysandra]

I wonder if the producers of the bubble for the John Travolta movie, still have the bubble.Con­gress could put him in it for his"own protection" {and ours} I mean, obviously Cheney has one somewhere that he must live in, and only comes out on the days he knows which branch of gov't he works for, oh and when he has heart attacks..w­hich begs the question,What Heart?

[AOoftheOPALS]

After reading the number of cogent intelligent comments, with detailed Knowledge of the last 30 years of history & republican spin. It makes me wonder, what the hell happened to the mass of marching morons that vote Bush, Cheney & the Emperors spinmiester, Rove into office. I do hope you people vote as well as blog. May hope rise again.

[Maxiesid]

I agree, except who are we to vote FOR? We have the Republicans, and the Republican lites running for President - and the news refuses to give us any information at all about anyone else that might be running and a news blackout is a virtual guarantee that those candidates have no chance. We are allowed to know all about Hillary.. and sometimes about Obama. If Edwards name is mentioned it is just in passing and usually is just some sort of sliming being done by our propaganda corp. That same propaganda corp that keeps telling us that Hillary is the 'front runner' The reason I bring this up is that like so many others, I won't be voting for Hillary this time. So, when the people that brought us the last eight years of absolute disgrace tell us that we can pick between Hillary and whoever they pick on the GOP side, who are we to vote for? I don't understand why the democrats are refusing to believe all of us that say we wont vote for Hillary -for some reason they think we will change our minds when it is down to a choice between the reigning evil empire and Hillary. It isn't going to happen, so they have already chosen to split the vote and lose the election. I can't help but wonder why that is?

[LizM]

And you think Condi would slip him that note...why­...because she thinks the idea of bombing Iran into submissiveness isn't such a brilliant one? Please. Let’s not give any credit where no credit is due - there’s plenty enough of that going on around here already.

[JAG]

Now! Now! Don't be too hard Bill, 48% of our fellow Americans are just as brain dead. If you are going to pull the wool over dipshit's head, make sure you drag the viewers of "Hoax News" with him.

Otherwise a GREAT commentary!

BRAVO!

[esky]

It would hilarious if it wasn't so true. This thing of ours can't moved by reality, reason, facts. He only believes. Can't fight that. Reason has flown. The center cannot hold. This boy is capable of anything. He will wish us into thew corn field (see Twilight Zone) if we disagree. He is sick and so are the people who enable him. Impeach Bush and Cheney!!!!!