Sarah Six-pack Needs To Put Country First by Stepping Down
Mike Judge, the creator of King of the Hill and Beavis & Butthead, once told a story on Letterman about how, one day, his Joe Six-pack next-door neighbor was inexplicably removing the back windshield from a 1978 Chevy Nova. So Judge walked out to the parking lot of his apartment building and asked the neighbor, "What are you doing?" And the neighbor gleefully answered, "Huh-huh-huh! Huh-huh! Now it's like a truck!"
In the freakishly hamfisted world of Sarah Palin, Mike Judge's neighbor is qualified to be vice president of the United States.
Yesterday, Palin said the following to talk radio wingnut Hugh Hewitt:
"Oh, I think they're just not used to someone coming in from the outside saying you know what? It's time that a normal Joe Six-pack American is finally represented in the position of vice presidency, and I think that that's kind of taken some people off guard, and they're out of sorts, and they're ticked off about it."
There's so much awfulness in this quote, it's difficult to know where to begin. Out of sorts? Ticked off? Oh you betcha.
For the last eight dark years we've had a president who continues to be framed as a Joe Six-pack type. And it's been a disaster. No-one, at this point, is disputing the toxicity of the Bush presidency.
Here's the difference, though, between President Bush's Joe Six-pack persona and Sarah Palin's. For better or worse, George Bush -- and I can't believe I'm writing this -- had attained a respectable level of schooling while also coming from a family deeply rooted in American politics. In other words, be it the fake Crawford "ranch" and his cowboy drag, George W. Bush is mostly pretending. He's "Joe Six-pack" insofar as he's running away from his silver-spooned, cheerleading, Skull & Bones background. That doesn't mean he's any less ignorant. He's still a disconnected, incompetent nothing. But at least he possesses something resembling the heft required of the office. And it's worth noting for the sake of context that he initially ran for president as the "guy you want to have a beer with" in 1999 and 2000 -- a time of relative peace and prosperity. Bored Americans figured, Whatever. Might as well.
Sarah Palin, on the other hand, is, by all indications, a bonafide hooplehead -- so dangerously out of her depth and so delusional -- perhaps blinded by ambition -- that she is in total denial about the real-world ramifications of her ineptitude. Instead, she's excusing her embarrassing television interviews and farcical candidacy as an historical breakthrough for "normal Joe Six-pack Americans."
Of course this is great news for the 27 percent who think Bushie is still doing a heckuva job. And I guess it's good news for anyone who wants to be president but doesn't want to go through all of that hard work and fancy book-learnin' to get there. But if there's one thing the history of this decade has taught us, it's that for the foreseeable future we should vigorously ignore the 27-percent-Bushies at all hazards -- or at least we shouldn't be encouraging them, as the McCain-Palin ticket appears to be doing.
Normal Joe Six-pack Americans, she says.
We learned the other night that Sarah Palin reads every periodical in existence. "All of 'em," she said. So she must know that we're engaged in two wars, while a third war is heating up with nuclear Pakistan, and a fourth with a potentially nuclear Iran. We're drowning in one of the worst financial meltdowns since the Great Depression. We have an energy crisis. A climate crisis. A Medicare crisis. A healthcare crisis. Crumbling infrastructure. Increasingly frequent natural disasters. And what about that guy who apparently rears his head over Alaska all the time like that weird Sunshine baby on the Teletubbies -- President Bush calls him Pooty Poot. What about him?
Compound all of this with the fact that Senator McCain is 72-years-old and then ask anyone who will listen: Do we really want a "normal Joe Six-pack American" sitting in the Oval Office in January tasked with managing these problems?
No wonder everyone is ticked off. And Senator McCain, knowing all of this (as well as the average heights of Koreans apparently), acquiesced to the far-right by selecting Sarah Palin anyway, just prior to launching a general election campaign centered on the ridiculously incongruous theme of "Country First."
If John McCain was really interested in putting country first, he would ask Sarah Palin to step off.
Palin herself appears to be, as I said, too ambitious to voluntarily step off, so it really comes down to McCain. What'll it be, Senator? For the good of the country as well as its increasingly buffoonish reputation, you have to do this. Of course you won't, but it's worth a shot. Just putting country first here. By the way, I bet with this economic meltdown, Mitt's looking awfully good about now, eh?
In a greater sense, Sarah Palin, in her ungainly scramble to justify her total lack of quality, is inadvertently revealing a startling lack of patriotism. The vice presidency is chiefly about being ready and able to take over the office of the presidency. Subsequently, the presidency is a position of enormous historical and national importance, requiring the very best America has to offer -- especially now. Idealistically, it's a position of merit and a title of great honor. Not necessarily the grandiose, kingly role envisioned by founders like John Adams and Alexander Hamilton, but heretofore an office of significant prestige. So by suggesting that just any "normal Joe Six-pack American" can do it not only insults and diminishes the office, but it also insults and diminishes Sarah Palin.
Of course Sarah Palin probably doesn't realize that by implying that just any ignorant hoople can be vice president, she's not only suggesting that she herself is an ignorant hoople but, most importantly, that she can be easily replaced by any ignorant hoople plucked by the mullet out of any random monster truck rally. In other words, it's a frivolous position open to anyone who can read a teleprompter without choking on his or her own tongue.
I mean, is she seriously advocating for equal job opportunities for Joe Six-pack? It's about time, she seems to have said, that normal Joe Six-pack Americans were in control of our most important and most complicated jobs. Joe Six-pack presidents. Joe Six-pack astronauts. Joe Six-pack police detectives. Joe Six-pack surgeons.
Imagine being wheeled into surgery for a triple bypass and just before they push the anesthesia, you see Sarah Palin walk into the operating theater with a hatchet. A nurse offers her some sterile gloves and she blurts out, "Thanks, but no thanks! Oh I love doin' amputations!"
Scary. But it's about time, right?
The presidency, as we've learned the hard way, matters. An incompetent chief executive, no matter how he or she has been packaged, tends to breed disaster. There was a time when we could rest assured knowing that, even if the president wasn't all there, he was surrounded by competent people who could grab the wheel if he blacked out. But those who are supporting the Republican ticket based on superficial appeal need to ask themselves: since when has the word "competent" been used to describe the current batch of operatives surrounding John McCain and Sarah Palin? These are the same handlers who came up with the laughable "Alaska is right next to Russia" line. Put it another way, the man who first coined that line was Steve Doocy.
In the real world -- a world in which America needs serious people making our most serious decisions -- Alaska's proximity to Russia has less to do with national security experience than a '78 Nova without its back windshield has to do with a truck. It's just not. Likewise, Joe Six-pack, while qualified for many decent jobs (governor of Alaska, too, I guess), is simply not qualified for our highest national office. Sorry, Joe! And sorry, Sarah. You're just not up for this, regardless of what you've tricked yourself into believing.
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Like Casca, I suspect, I also think that Repubs are illegitimately congratulating themselves over Palin's “performan
"No-one, at this point, is disputing the toxicity of the Bush presidency. "
Umm. I can probably name a few but I won't to protect their own safety and to save myself from humiliation.
The funny thing is, I remember when Mike Judge said that, and it's always seemed to me the crystallization of Dumb America. Bob, using it in the context of this election and this particular candidate is dead on.
Joe six pack ...what a joke.....I can't even afford a 24 ounce can let alone a six pack....lo
Try looking for work.
So, Bush got voted in because folks would like to have a beer with him... So with Sarah it's a six-pack?
What is this phrasology from Gov. Palin. I was insulted and continue to be insulted by her
Phrase “Joe Six-Pack. You know the middle class is not a bunch of beer drinking low lifes. I have a family and we live in New England and I don’t know what men do in Alaska, but I don’t drink and neither does my son or son in law. This weekend we are going to watch some sports, drink Coke and eat munchies and on Sunday we are going to church and after church the guys are taking all the kids apple picking. No beer drinking on our schedule and we are all three families middle class, making under $75,000 per year.
I do not like her body language and words that she uses to try to get close to the middle class. Maybe it worked it Alaska, but not in New England.
I couldn't agree more. My sister and I were just saying today that this nasty and dopey woman, Palin, has a lot of nerve ruining the reputation of working people. We grew up in rural and small town America and never heard anyone going around using the term "Joe Six-Pack" or any of her other supposedly down home expressions. Our male friends and relatives worked hard, spent time with their families, encouraged us to do well in school and be useful citizens. No grown men had time to sit around drinking beer--six-pack or otherwise. Palin is a fraud and only someone with the poor judgment of John McCain would think otherwise. Please do not further her odious cause by elevating her insulting language into general discussion. Instead, consult Joe Biden or Tim Russert's family on what working families are like.
I'm from Oklahoma, one of the reddest states in the nation. But I bleed blue and am a big supporter of Obama/Biden. I'm sure we are nationally perceived as a state that is chock full of "Joe Six Packs". (honestly, I hate that term used to describe working people as well) I found her attempt at folksiness so "gosh darn" patronizing. I think that when they prepped her for the debate, she was told to use a "heckuva" lot of down home expressions to appeal to the working class voter. Some people here are hurting economically but they will keep voting for the people who appear to be talking like them. To me it is talking down to them and working them to get them to vote against their economic interest. I am a working mom, and if you want to appeal to me, you better give me some straight talk about how you want to fix health care and address global warming and the economy and improve education and even consider responsible sex education so that i don't have to plan a wedding for my daughter while she is still a teenager. I also want some straight talk on improving our energy and quit giving BS about how you come from a energy producing state. I come from one, too and do I think we need some straight answers? You betcha (wink, wink)!
When Bob Cesca mentioned in his column that perhaps Sarah Palin
was "blinded by ambition", I believe that he was really thinking of Hillary
Clinton, who is, in my opinion, far more sinisterly dangerous to these
United States than some backwoods pioneer from Alaska. Mrs. Palin
may be a rank beginner and have some rather wild beliefs, but she does
have the essential basic integrity (most important), honesty, and character to learn almost any job and perform it with enthusiasm and
selflessness. This is not often found in professional politicians. I am,
of course, voting for Mr. Obama. hipo
Great post - Couldn't have said it better myself. Does anyone know an Interventionist of some sort in Atlanta, GA area who can help w/ family members who watch too much FoxNews? I know there have to be plenty others in the area with the same problem.
Love it. I couldn't have expressed this any better. I've been fumbling around with my own ideas about what exactly she's about as a person and as a politician, but you've done a great job nailing the two key points: (1) McCain picked her to win an election, not because he thought she was really qualified (if he did, then he's dumber than I thought) and (2) her own lack of self-awareness of her own limitations means that she's absolutely not qualified.
On the second point, I found it interesting when she didn't answer the question from Gwen about her Achille's heel (among the rest of the many questions she chose to avoid) while Biden stepped up to the plate and talked about his own faults.
kimeronhar
McCain needs to step down to VP slot and let Palin take the Prez position. This might really energize the base!
"...she's not only suggesting that she herself is an ignorant hoople but, most importantly, that she can be easily replaced by any ignorant hoople plucked by the mullet out of any random monster truck rally."
That's one of the funniest things I've ever read in my entire life. And, unlike Palin, I really do read quite a bit!
Watch here for Sarah Palin doing a post debate analysis of her performance!
http://www
Joe Frickin Six-Pack..
man...plea
JOE SIXPACKS FOR OBAMA.
Hey, anyone can drink beer!
I want to get off too, but I think the conductor is busy sending a text message...
heh, heh
i could've lived with john mccain as president. not happily, but hey, at least he's not a bush.
but this woman ... running the country from the bunker during the next terrorist attack on U.S. soil? or anywhere near any nuclear warhead triggers should the unthinkable happen?
the mind reels.
i wish i didn't know in my heart that the majority of people who vote for mccain will be basing their votes on those stylish kawasaki eyeglasses.
The sound of Palin's whiny, cloying voice was enough to send me scrambling for the TIVO remote to fast-forward.
Let's get a grownup in the White House!
Obama & Biden!!!!
"That doesn't mean he's any less ignorant. He's still a disconnected, incompetent nothing. But at least he possesses something resembling the heft required of the office."
It still amazes me that people think Bush is an incompetent idiot. George Bush knows exactly what he is doing. For the people and institutions he represents, corporate America and millionair
This latest new debt he wants us to take on fulfills both agendas. He helps the already wealthy remain that way and he plunges the country into an even deeper debt. The NEOCONS want to get this country so far in depth that we either have to cancel social programs because we can no longer afford them because of our debt service or drastically reduce them.
You can't fight something unless you know exactly what it is. Calling Bush incompetent is irresponsible. Give it it's proper name and that is class warfare. Guess what? They are winning precisely because we don't call them out on what they are dong. We just say they are stupid and incompetent. No they aren't. They are succeeding beyond their wildest dreams and this silly name calling by the media is helping them.
Yep, and this bailout package was the Icing on top, the champaigne flutes will be held high this Christmas in Kennebunkport!
MCCAIN IS PUTTING AMERICAN AT RISK BY HIS VP CHOICE. TO KNOWINGLY DO THIS IS TREASON AND UNPATRIOTIC.
THE QUESTION IS WHERE ARE THE REAL PATRIOTIC GOP AND WHY ARE THEY MUTED????.
They're at church being cleansed of witchcraft and demons.
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