The Democrats Could Learn A Lot From Larry Craig's Balls

As we all know, Senator Larry Craig is an anti-gay, right-wing zealot and fantastically gifted hypocrite who was arrested while allegedly attempting to solicit gay sex in an airport men's room; he was booked on charges and nationally disgraced.

Despite all of that, Senator Craig has brazenly defied his party and has returned to the senate to help filibuster and obstruct every important piece of legislation the Democrats introduce.

Meanwhile, the Democrats, who we specifically elected to end the occupation of Iraq and, to a lesser extent, check the power of the president, allowed the Republicans to filibuster, 1) an amendment that would've restored habeas corpus, one of our most cherished constitutional rights; and 2) an amendment that would've supported the troops by giving them more family time between tours.

Prior to this embarrassing week of events on the Hill, the Democratic majority has acquiesced on war funding and have fallen over themselves backpedaling as fast as their trembling legs could carry them in the face of everything President Loser and the Republicans have farted in their general direction.

It's clear that the Democrats could learn a lot from Senator Craig's comparatively mighty balls.

(And I hasten to note that there is a dozen or so senate Democrats -- Senators Webb, Dodd, Leahy, Feingold, etc... -- who are most definitely not indicative of their party's recent castrata status.)

Unlike the era prior to the 2006 midterms, suddenly 51 votes -- or 56 votes -- aren't good enough. Somehow, the Democrats have allowed the White House and GOP to obstruct so vigorously that attaining 60 senate votes is the only way to bring a piece of legislation to a vote in the first place. 60 votes, plus or minus a Lieberman. But other than in the blogosphere, we're not hearing protests of obstructionism. We're not hearing vocal demands all across the media spectrum for an up-or-down-vote. Instead we get the idling hum of Senator Reid's voice and a distraction from MoveOn, bless them.

And the president, in his special needs press conference* this week, continued to bully the Democrats as if he's still performing his Vincent Chase from Entourage strut in that flight suit (one of the early indications of the president's move towards, as Keith Olbermann called it Thursday night, a military junta) waving his giant stuffed cod piece with more vigor than Britney's saddlebags at the VMAs.

There is no reason whatsoever why the Democrats need to even acknowledge the existence of the president and his childish disciples in Congress. "Who's that talking? Cornyn? 'The hell's a Cornyn?" After all, the American people want everything the Democrats say they stand for: a rapid end to the war, a restoration of the Constitution, universal health care, clean energy, less outsourcing, and all the rest.

So why, given the choice, do the Democrats, at the expense of their voters, continue to flinch when confronted by the unpopular and widely disgraced Republican Party?

It's because they're locked into bad habits established prior to the invasion and occupation of Iraq. I call it the Dreaded Lieberman-Gephardt-Stockholm Syndrome.

They somehow continue to believe that if they fall too far to the left -- if they take too bold of a fuck you posture -- Karl Rove and Roger Ailes will cold cock them with a rubber bullet -- a massive legal (and illegal) propaganda campaign labeling them as "with the terrorists" or "too French" or whatever lowest common denominator bullshit they yank from their white asses in order to jazz up their ignoramus base.

Restore habeas rights? With the terrorists! Give the troops more time off? The Democrats hate the troops!

This week, for instance, the Democrats should've carpet bombed the media with quotes including the phrase "obstructionist Republicans". The big ticket amendments this week should've been unofficially nicknamed "The Military Families Amendment" or the "Save The Constitution Amendment".

This way, they could saturate the media with quotes like, "Why is Senator McCain against saving the Constitution?" or, "Why is Republican Senator Lieberman against military families?" For fuck's sake, I at least hope the DNC is saving some of the floor debate video for next year. An entire campaign's worth of TV buys could be produced from yesterday's White House and senate floor performances.

But instead of a bold and aggressive Democratic Party empowered by the support of legions of Americans as well as a disgraced and unpopular GOP, we get this bungled and botched week of wet-bread politics. I know we're not supposed to eat our own, but screw that. The Democrats embarrassed, disappointed and pissed me off this week. Have I made myself clear on that yet?

And if that wasn't bad enough, on the campaign front, we have a Democratic presidential frontrunner who released a health care plan this week that's nothing more than a veiled GOP health care plan -- with an extra step or two between your tax dollars and gigantically profitable insurance companies. I'm sure if you asked a policy staffer (in private) why the plan is so fucking awful, they might admit to something like, This is a plan that will actually pass (because of lobbyist support and more bipartisan votes).

It's a plan that smacks of lobbyists and preemptively bipartisan cooperation, when, in fact, Americans are starved for something a thousand times more courageous.

Bill Maher told Wolf Blitzer this week that Senator Craig might bring the whole party down with him. I wish that were true. The truth is that Senator Craig only reinforces the reasons why the Republicans won the week and why the Democrats and, in turn, the American people lost.

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* President Bush in Thursday's press conference: "I heard somebody say, 'Where's Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead because Saddam Hussein killed all the Mandelas." First, huh what? Second, Mandela is still alive.
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Help save John From Cincinnati here. Bill Jacks would do the same for you, ya' mope.

Comments

[dragonswizardz]

Nice headline~~­~~~~~~~~~~­~~~~~~~ assume no pun intended.

[hiprogloho]

The CraigsLust fiasco was a waterclose­t---excuse me---watershed event in American politics. Larry is not holding out because he has balls. On the contrary. He's doing so because like his Club GOPed Congressional colleagues he is a political predator without conscience. Beltway spin has been that his downfall is due to gay bashing when in truth it is an outcry against public perverts who screw the American public in private with unConstitutional laws.

If we have arrived at an Orwellian juncture in our history where polite pundits make it a hate crime to call out the identity of criminals in our midst to save the republic, we are not merely suffering from lack of cojones. We are slowly dying of political correctness. From Hollywood to DC, the Neros and Caligulas of the fall of Western Rome are getting away with murder because it isn't politically prudent to call a spade a spade or a GOP perv a perv. Wake up, Dems!

[situationcritical]

Bob, I understand where you're coming from, but in the long run there is really nothing to gain from taking the low road.

[OckhamsElectricRazor]

Right on! It should be made clear to candidates of BOTH parties that failure to act on behalf of the people will be a 'third rail' issue in their current and future campaigns.

The Incumbant Party needs to spin off it subsiduaries into separate and distinct Democratic and Republican entities.

[JackNasty]

Sen. Craig is a pathetic, cowardly closet case. Using Sen. Craig as a standard for courage is truly lowering the bar. That said, the bar truly needs lowering to describe the cowering, so-called Democratic leadership in Congress today.

Good lord those people are as disgusting. They are as disgusting for their refusal to stand up to the Repugs as the Repugs are for their lying and bullying. I think the polls that show Congress with an 11% approval rating are grossly inflated. I can't imagine approval is that high.

[nellyol'son]

my grandmother has more balls than the congressional democrats.

and she's dead, btw.

since 1986.

seriously, tho, i'm beginning to wonder whose camp the democrats are really in. is it a matter of balls or allegiance? have the republicans burrowed themselves so deeply into the structure of government they're actually deep within the democratic party as well?

[FDRbyGodDemocrat]

Excellent piece.

And extremely well-timed given the email that the DSCC sent out today under James Carville's signature. In effect it said that "George Bush ain't the decider. We're the decider."

That in itself took balls, given the Senate's cowardly performance lately. I wrote back (not that anyone will read it):

We're the deciders??? With all due respect, Mr. Carville: Bullshit.

If we were the deciders we would stop the war. We would have control of the Senate. But that requires much more resolve and courage than the current Democratic senators are able to muster.

[dwillisno1]

When you plead guilty with no attorney and with 6 weeks to think about it you have only one choice. Do something so bold and ballsy that people will think he must be innocent or he wouldn't do this. Craig is working not only on possibly staying in the Senate but also enhancing his employability if he has to resign. Shame is dead and extreme partisan willingness to overlook is the reason.

[freedomis]

As Ian Welsh has stated in another blog,betrayus lied and all those senators who backed him were backing a liar.Anoth­er thing,since when does a military uniform trump the Constitution?I did 20 in the AF and went to Vietnam.I even voted for nixon,so you can see that I drank the koolaid.Do­nt regret because I learned that war for anything but defense is leagal murder.Not something that I wish to pass on. Tony

[NoContest]

I agree Bob, I used to think that shrub was the National embarrassment. Now, it's the Democrats - especially the goofy leadership. Hairy Reed looks like a dumpy Deputy Dawg, jowls sagging, talking tough trash through a dour face that wouldn't scare a baby.

Durbin is like some kind of Rodney Dangerfield. Popping off at the mouth and nobody gives him any respect.

Now, on the the 67 year old "Glamour Gurl" Pelosi, she is more interested in modeling Armani and her droopy tits in the latest Victoria's Secret prop-em-up bra than fighting anybody. She barks a little with Reid and then heads bacl off to the cloakroom to work on her "biography" and her 7 Million Dollar advance with Harcourt Brace.

Then we have, Jolly Old W.C. Fields, John Murtha.

If you got within 5 feet of him I bet you could get drunk just off of his breath. He looks like one gigantic stale oak keg of brandy.

Damn, we are screwed. Why really, do we even care any more???

~!

[sdskelton03]

Bob

I love how you bemoan the republicans dirty tricks and then ecourage the democrats to do the exact same thing.

Why not introduce the " Ried Kennedy Kittens and Lollipops act of 2007?"

[OckhamsElectricRazor]

Yes, but just be very careful not to actually touch his balls.

[disgusted48]

Cesca, your piece was laugh out loud funny. And yet it is so sad. I always thought that the people in my party (the democrats)were smarter than the, for us or against us republicans, but apparently I was mistaken. The democrats are the dumb ones. How you can get voted in on the issues by a basically conservative American public, and still lose on the issues by way of strategy, is just way beyond me. I feel like we get outsmarted, out talked and out manuevered at every turn. The democrats are the stupid ones. I give up. I don't even think I can vote for these guys and gals anymore.

[wmfor]

Thank you for expressing my own exasperation with the timid pussy-footing of the Democrats.

I almost puked when I heard they passed a resolution to say criticizing the Surgin' General is un-American. Hell, why don't they just repeal the damn Constitution and pray Bush will stop accusing them of helping the terrists.

But not passing the Amendment to give soldiers time at home? Because Bush threatens a veto? Why not just say "Sign it or no money!" and stick to that. Balls indeed!

[liberalveteran]

The Democrats in voting against Moveon.org just insulted three million memebers of their base. It is also an organization that gives the Democrats large campaign contributions.

They apparently did it, so nobody on Fox News and Rightwing Talk Radio would say a bad word about them.

The tactic completely failed. Every member of the rightwing media is blasting them every second.

And every member of their base has been insulted and belittled.

Apparently, the way the Democratic Congress fights a war is by bombing their allies.

[JustADumbFireman]

MoveOn announced today that they received $500,000 more in contributions just as a result of that idiotic Senate vote. I just gave an additional $25. The Dems had better wake up and listen to what their base is saying and how they are voting with their money.

[nickyboy1]

Facist nation.

[KeysDan]

If Senator Reid cannot bury a non-binding amendment that is the antithesis of constitutionally protected political speech, he should hire some of Craig's or one of his Republican senatorial playmates to teach him the parliamentary ropes on obfuscation and delay. What was he thinking? He, like Craig, got caught with his pants down--but, at least Craig's transgression was a victimless crime.

[ReasonIsMyReligion]

Right on.

How can the majority party even allow crap like this to reach a full Senate vote?

Can't this sh*t be nipped in committees?