Communists in Charleston, WV!

Charleston, WV -- It might surprise you to learn that Charleston, West Virginia, is a hotbed of communist activity and that the leader of the Marxist cell here is the editor of the Charleston Gazette, James A. Haught. But the source is certainly reliable -- Massey Coal Company CEO Don Blankenship. Blankenship seems to be in a bad mood these days. (His stock price is down from over ninety dollars to the teens since July.)

So at a speech at the Tug Valley Mining Institute, he lashed out with these remarkable musings:

"It is as great a pleasure for me to be criticized by the communists and the atheists of the Charleston Gazette as to be applauded by my best friends," he said. "Because I know they are wrong. People are cowering away from being criticized by people that are our enemies. Would we be upset if Osama Bin Laden was critical of us?"

He went on to criticize environmental organizations, Al Gore, Nancy Pelosi, and Harry Reid with the following terms, which he said were the only ones the general public could understand:

"Totally wrong. Nonsense. Absolutely crazy."

"When we talk about it in more articulate ways, the American public doesn't get it."

Blankenship went on to dismiss the idea that protecting the environment should be anyone's concern:

"They can say what they want about climate change. But the only thing melting in this country that matters is our financial system and our economy."

He also explained where the real risk of a Communist take over of the U.S. comes from -- it all begins with energy efficiency:

"Jimmy Carter understood that there was a risk if we increased our dependence on foreign oil. But did it not sound similar to Obama? Turn down your thermostats? Buy a smaller car? Conserve? I have spent quite a bit of time in Russia and China, and that's the first stage. You go from having your own car to carpooling to riding the bus to mass transit. You eventually get to where you're walking. You go from your own apartment and bathroom to sharing kitchens with four families. That's what socialism and the elimination of capitalism and free enterprise is all about."

And finally he offered his solution -- better spin:

"Massey is working hard to come up with soundbites or what sort of messages might resonant publicly. Unless we get people to think positively about coal, we are in trouble not only as an industry, but also as a country."

If you'd like to offer your soundbites, you can go to the Sierra Club's "Clean Coal Is Not the Answer" website and enter your best ideas. We'll put a billboard with the winning entry on a truck and drive it to where Mr. Blankenship will be sure to see it.